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“What do you mean,not now? Did you blame yourself before?”
“Of course I did, I couldn't help it. I thought maybe I’d let my guard down too much or maybe I’d been too flirty. Maybe he felt like I was leading him on.”
“How could you think that? Even if youwereflirting, it doesn’t…it doesn’t mean…”
His voice rose on a surge of anger as it pulsed through his body like a poison, and she squeezed his hand.
“Fitzwilliam, stop. Look at me.” His eyes met hers. “I know now that feeling responsible is normal. But I don't feel that way anymore. I was a victim, and I was taken advantage of in the worst possible way by a predator. Iknowit wasn't my fault. I did nothing wrong.”
“If I ever see him again, I swear, I'll—”
“Youwon'tsee him again. He's gone. Hopefully for good. He was only in our lives for a short time, but being angry and feeling guiltykeepshim here. We have to let those feelings go so we can move on.”
He took a deep breath and looked,reallylooked, at his sister. She was so serene, so calm. Part of the reason he hadn't been able to talk to her until now was because, in his eyes, she was still a child he was trying to protect. But that child was long gone.
“You need to stop being angry,” she said quietly. “I have. I can't change what happened, but I won't let it rule the rest of my life. I know I need more time to heal, and I'm going to take it, but I know it won't be forever.”
“I want you to do whatever you need to do. Take all the time you want. And I think this is the perfect place for you to be.”
“I think so too. It’s so peaceful. They say salt water heals the soul, and it’s true. It's amazing how the sound of the ocean can be so comforting. I love it.”
Hearing her say that made him think of Elizabeth, and his thoughts drifted to their earlier conversation. He stared ahead blankly, lost in his thoughts, until Georgiana nudged him with her knee.
“Did you fix it? With Elizabeth?”
He shrugged. “I hope so. I'll call her later, and I'll see her tomorrow.”
“Why were you upset with her?”
“She just caught me off guard. I felt ambushed. And I don’t want to talk about the bad stuff with her, you know?”
“It's not always going to be ice cream and sunsets with you two. It’s not the way life works.”
“But that doesn't mean I can'ttryto make it ice cream and sunsets, right?”
“Of course you can try, but don’t be so hard on yourself when things aren’t perfect. Lizzy doesn't seem like someone who would only want the good parts. If she did, she wouldn't have made the effort to talk to you. She wouldn't have sat with me, talked with me, and let me cry on her shoulder.”
“You're right.” He paused and swallowed heavily. “I think I'm falling in love with her.”
His heart pounded rapidly in his chest. He’d thought it enough, but saying it was entirely different.
Georgiana smiled. “You're just realizing this now? It's so obvious.”
“You told me you thought I had a crush.”
“Oh, please. That was a month ago.”
“But what if itisjust a crush?”
She shrugged. “Does it matter? You care about her, and she cares about you. She's got her own crush going on, believe me.”
“How do you know? What did she say to you?”
She rolled her eyes. “What is this, seventh grade? Why don't you pass her a note and find out for yourself?”
“Very funny.”
She leaned against him and rested her head on his shoulder, and they discussed his upcoming trip to California. Later that evening they ordered takeout, and enjoyed dinner on the deck, talking sometimes, but mostly enjoying the sound of the ocean and the cries of the shore birds.
Even though Will was exhausted, a tremendous weight had been lifted from his shoulders, and he felt better than he had in a very long time.
