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MILA
Friday. I’ve been back a whole week, and Mom hasn’t called. Not even once. But I can see from her social media that she’s been making the rounds, showing off her baby belly. Well, lack of one, since it’s too early.
I’m lucky that Cadence and Sadie took pity on me. They’ve been driving me home every day after school so I don’t have to wait around for Grady. He’s still giving me a lift in the mornings, but he gets home way later than Jace at night. Yeah…I’ve been spying out my bedroom window.
One thing’s for sure—Jace, Hunter, and Roman haven’t spoken to me once since the whole Asher thing. I told Cadence and Sadie who Asher is to me, that I’m pretty sure my dad will marry his mom. They think it’s funny that I haven’t told the guys. But what’s it to them? They chose to believe the worst because of what Jace saw. That’s on them.
Just one class left for the day, and I’m free for the weekend. Madison and I are going to the movies tomorrow. We’re having dinner at their place tonight, and I’m curious to see their home. Dad said they have a hot tub. Not that it’s hot tub weather…not yet, anyway.
I groan when I get to the locker room and see Britney and Summer. Why am I taking P.E. again? To torture myself?
Since I’m a great runner, I thought I might try out for track. I’m also kinda lazy, so maybe not.
“Sluts aren’t welcome here,” Britney sneers. Summer laughs like the comment was actually funny. These girls have no idea how to be mean girls. Hell, my school back in New York was full of them, and they were scary. These two are harmless imitations.
“Then, why are you here, Britney?”
She sputters. “You wish you had Jace, but he’s mine. I see the way you look at him. If you get too close, I’ll hurt you.”
I sigh. Honestly, if they weren’t so pathetic, I’d play along with them longer. But it’s just too tragic to watch.
“Okay, Stink-ney.” That got a few curse words from the two of them.
Iget changed and stroll out to see the three of them are in class with me. Now that I’m closer to them, I notice that Roman has a black eye. He catches me looking and turns away. Fuck, is that from his dad? I want to ask Roman if he’s okay. I want to offer to let him stay at my place.
But he hasn’t spoken to me, even in class. Next week, we need to start class projects, and he’s my partner. So I need him to at least talk while we’re trying to work. He can go back to ignoring me, or whatever this silent shit is, after our project is complete.
Jace steps up to me, his arms crossed over his chest as he cocks his head. Wow, he wants to talk to me now? Okay then, I’ll bite.
“What?” I question, mirroring the same position, knowing my arms are only making my boobs look bigger. He looks down at them, and I can see his intake of breath as he licks his lower lip. Fuck, having him look at me that way has my tummy flipping. It’s a heated look, one I don’t think he realizes he’s doing.
“Who was first?” he whispers, his eyes now burning holes into mine.
I raise my brows. Are we still on this? This line of questioning is getting old, especially after he accused me of sleeping with a King on Tuesday and ignored me all week.
“Who did I kiss first?” I ask.
Britney chooses that moment to slide into his side, catching onto what Jace just asked me. “Yeah, I know it wasn’t Jace. He would never want to kiss you.”
I laugh. Is she serious? “Dang, you’re a little slow, Britney.”
She puffs up her chest and holds Jace tight. “And what do you mean by that?”
I throw my hands up. This girl is unbelievable.
“I don’t know, the fact that your boyfriend is asking me which one of him and his friends I kissed first? He’s the one asking, Britney. Wanting to know if it was him.”
Her mouth pops open and closed again as her cheeks grow pink.
Jace’s jaw ticks. “It doesn’t matter,” he growls and moves to turn away.
I sigh. I fucked this up. It’s my fault I got myself into this mess in the first place. I hate this, the silence, the mean words. He deserves to know, they all do. But I could never hurt them with the truth.
“I get it, okay? I know I fucked up. I thought I was leaving forever, and I kissed you all. I was twelve, and I felt like leaving you was the end of the world. To me, you all were my first kiss, no matter the order it happened. The first kiss I had with each of you was my first with you. And I’m sorry if you can’t accept that answer, but it’s the only one I have to offer.”
The real answer would hurt two others, and I could never live with myself if they found out who my first was. I can’t hurt them again. I did this, I made my bed, and I had to be the one to apologize. I deserved the cold shoulders, the silent treatments. Everything they had done was understandable. I hurt them all.
Roman is walking away. Did he hear me? I hope he did. Hunter looks at me now, really looks at me. He nods and turns to follow Roman. My heart starts beating faster. I want him to understand and let me back in, I just miss them all so much. This past week has been hard.
