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I quickly pick up her limp and lifeless body into my arms and rush toward the door. Everyone makes space for me to pass and then the guys are rushing out ahead of me to get the car ready. Once we get to the garage, we split into two groups because we can’t all fit into one vehicle.
I hop into one of the SUVs with Royce jumping into the driver’s seat. Riley and Grayson tag along with us but I don’t say anything. I’m guessing they need to be here. We just need to hurry. Gray is already spiraling since he was the one to find her and well, I wouldn’t expect less from Riley, seeing as it’s her best friend.
Royce speeds out onto the road and everyone is silent as we make our way to the emergency room. I cradle her close to my chest. Because I have some time to think now, what just happened is finally sinking in. She fucking tried to kill herself with the intention of never coming back and I don’t know why that thought makes pain slice through my chest.
We managed to ease the bleeding by wrapping her arms tightly and adding some medical tape to the bandages, so hopefully that helps her hold on a little longer. Thank God it didn’t look like she managed to get any of her veins, or she would’ve been dead by now. She’s definitely going to need stitches though. The hospital is twenty minutes away but sitting in the car not being able to do anything is making it feel longer.
“Drive faster!” I tell Royce when I feel for her pulse again and it’s weaker than before. He doesn’t hesitate to floor it. I’m thankful that no one else is on the road at this hour and also glad that the road isn’t covered in snow or ice or that would’ve taken longer since the roads here can get pretty bad.
I can already feel her slipping away in my arms and my fucking heart hurts at the thought of her not being here anymore. I really am a fucking prick!
I let out a sigh and do something I haven’t done in a while. I pray she makes it because as much as I hate her, I don’t know what I’d do if she wasn’t alive anymore. This is the moment when I really grasp that I could lose her for real and I’m not ready to face that possibility. This is also the moment where I make myself a promise. I promise myself that after today, I’ll just leave shit in the past and focus on not hurting her anymore. The thought of actually losing her is not one I can grasp, not now and not ever. She needs to be alive and be at my side.
“Please hold on a little longer, baby,” I beg her in a whisper as I place a kiss on her forehead. Yes, I’m aware that I’m a contradicting asshole. One minute, I hate her and want to punish her and the other, I’m praying that she makes it.
That’s how fucking tied up in knots she has me. I can’t even think straight anymore. In the next second, we come to a screeching halt in front of the ER, and I don’t even wait for the SUV to come to a full stop before I’m shoving my door open and getting out. I sprint forward to the doors of the ER with her still wrapped up in my arms.
“Help!” I scream at the top of my lungs and two nurses rush over to me. They give her a once-over before getting a stretcher.
“What happened to her?” one of them asks as Winter’s being placed on the stretcher.
“Sh-she tried to commit suicide. She took a bunch of pills and slit her wrists…” I say, trailing off because I get too choked up to speak. Saying it out loud brings the reality of how serious it is crashing down on me.
The nurse nods and rushes off with her through the door. A minute later, the others rush in, and I let them know she’s in the hands of the nurses right now. We all move to the waiting room and find a seat, none of us knowing what to say right now.
I can’t sit still so I pace the room. A few minutes later, I see Riley walking over to me and I know we’re about to have a showdown right here and right now from the look in her eyes.
“What the fuck did you do to her?” she demands when she’s right in front of me. She pushes me against the chest and when I don’t budge, she gets more pissed off and starts to pound my chest while letting out sobs.
“I- I…” that’s all I manage to say because I can’t find any more words right now.
“I told you she was barely holding on and you still went and fucked shit up! If she dies, this is on you!” she cries. I grab her and pull her closer to me, wrapping my arms around her as she sobs into my chest.
I don’t bother answering because what the hell else is there to say? She’s right as much as I hate to admit it. A minute later, Royce comes over and takes her away from me. He pulls her to sit on one of the chairs and he wraps his arms around her to comfort her.
Grayson sits on the floor with his back against the wall, knees up with his head in his hands. He’s still visibly upset so I walk over and stand in front of him.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
“If anything happens to her, I’ll hate you for the rest of our lives,” he says as he raises his head to look up at me. My throat closes up with emotion because I know he means every word he’s saying.
“When I went into the bathroom, she was still conscious. Do you want to know what she said to me?” he asks. I don’t say a word to interrupt him because I know he’ll continue, and he needs to get this off his chest. “She said I wasn’t her friend because I didn’t help her when she needed help. She said I just stood by and watched. The part that fucking kills me is when she said that it was okay… she fucking said it was okay…” he lets out a hollow laugh. “And then she really put the nail in, when she said for the first time in months, she finally felt peace. She even told me to make sure I take care of your dumbass right before she passed out,” he says, sobbing now. His words are like a punch to the gut. Even after all the shit I’ve done and her on the verge of dying, she was thinking about me.
“I don’t know how things got so fucked up and toxic between us,” I say, feeling lost for the first time in my life.
“I don’t know either, but you need to do something before you two kill each other! And from the looks of it, one of you is already on the verge of fucking dying! If she makes it through this, you better fucking fix this shit, or you’ll no longer have a brother!” he says through clenched teeth as tears continue to pour down his face. Wow! I know I’ve royally fucked up when Grayson is the one giving me ultimatums.
“She’ll pull through,” I say barely above a whisper. She just has to.
“And if she doesn’t?” he asks with a sneer. I deserve his treatment but he’s starting to piss me off.
“She will!” I snap at him. I’m saved from hearing his response when a doctor walks into the waiting room and focuses on us. About fucking time because the wait has been killing me. After the nurses took her, I filled out the necessary paperwork. I had to put myself down as her fiancé just to get things sorted.
It’s been an hour since we’ve been waiting here so I’m anxious and glad that the doctor is finally here, hopefully with some news.
“Is a Mason King here for Winter Crowne?” he asks, and I jump to my feet.
“Right here,” I say. “How is she, Doctor?”
