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Ella
SeeingOwen on this bridge is the last thing I expect. I don’t know whether I want to yell at him or jump him. The latter surprises me, but I don’t show it. Instead, I cross my arms and listen to him spew words I’m trying not to believe.
But the longer he talks and the closer he gets to me, the more I want to believe everything. I don’t want Owen to be just like every other guy I dated before him. Except, it doesn’t matter how much I want that. I can’t change who Owen is, and he showed me who that is both times I saw him with Natalie, along with the amount of shit he put up with from Jack.
At least, that’s what I think until Owen confesses that he quit working for that douchebag. That he’s walked away from everything he’d already told me he wanted merely because he wanted me more.
He’s saying everything I’ve always wished a man would say, but I don’t know if I can trust Owen. The risk is too great. I already know after only spending a few days with him that he’s the kind of man I could lose myself to.
I can’t ever be that vulnerable again. I can’t give him the power to hurt me.
“I’m going to jump with you, Ella,” Owen says, making me flinch when he returns from talking to the employees.
“You can’t do that,” I reply.
He already looks close to passing out. I can’t imagine what jumping will do to him. His skin is pale and pasty. His hands and arms are shaking, and there is a layer of sweat shining over his exposed skin.
“I can, Ella. I want you to know that no matter what, I’ll always jump with you. You don’t have to be afraid. Even if you’re not ready for anything serious, as long as you don’t send me away, I’m going to be right here, in whatever capacity you’ll have me.”
Mother shit. It’s like he can read my mind. It’s been that way since the first day at the hotel. He knew what I needed with Blake. He knew what I needed in his room. He’s known when to push and when not to this entire time.
All of those things I refused to see or accept when we’d been on the island, but being back at home, seeing him here now, I can’t deny that, somehow, in just a matter of days, Owen Porter has figured me out.
“Unless you’d rather do this on your own,” Owen adds when I don’t respond to his prolific words.
“No. I mean, only if you really want to. I’m not here to tell you what to do,” I reply, but I’ve lost the conviction in my voice from earlier.
“Ella, your wants and needs are just as important as anyone else’s. If jumping from this bridge on your own is what you need, then I’ll meet you at the bottom. If you just want me gone, then I’ll do that, too, regardless of how much it pains me to walk away from you. None of what I said means anything unless you believe me and want me here.”
Damn him for making me feel. Damn him for coming here and showing me the truth. Damn him for facing his fears and making me feel strong enough to do the same.
“I don’t want you to go, Owen. I don’t know what that means after we get to the bottom, but I know that having you at my side when I jump isn’t the worst thing that could happen today. I know that I’ve missed you even when I didn’t want to, that I’ve thought of you even when I tried otherwise. Craved you when I shouldn’t have, but I can’t promise I’m ready for anything more than what we had on the island. I need time.”
He steps forward and cups my cheeks with the biggest grin on his face. “Ella Danes, all you have to do is ask and I’ll give you whatever you want. Even if it’s time.”
I reach for his shirt and pull him closer. I need to feel his lips on mine and to taste him on my tongue before we jump. Waiting another minute longer isn’t possible after all our revelations.
Owen’s hands burrow into my braided hair, and I keep a tight hold on his shirt. Our tongues battle for dominance as if no time has passed since I last kissed him.
It’s only when one of the employees clears their throat that Owen pulls back. “I guess it’s time to strap up.”
His voice is sure, but he’s still shaking.
“You don’t have to do this,” I say.
He steps into the first of many straps that he’ll be hooked to. “Yes, I do. For many reasons. If I’m going to ask you to let go of your fears and trust me, then I need to do the same.”
“Okay,” I reply with a wink.
His eyes narrow at me and his lip curls, but he can’t get any closer to me while being secured to the bungee.
Letting Owen jump from the bridge with me and not telling him to leave isn’t what I thought would happen if I ever saw him again, but there is nothing about having him next to me that feels wrong. I wasn’t sure I could ever trust another man again, especially not one I’ve only just met, but I don’t want to ignore my gut or my heart. Both of which say Owen is worth keeping around.
“Alright, we’ll do one more check on both of your harnesses, and then we’re good to go,” the woman who previously strapped me in says.
She grins widely at me when I nod, and I’m surprised I don’t feel at all embarrassed that possibly one of the most impactful moments of my life unfolded in front of a handful of strangers.
Another guy pulls on the buckles around my chest, waist, and ankles before guiding me forward on the deck we’ll be jumping from. Owen is ghost white while he shuffles his way toward me.
