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The reverberations of last night are going to echo around the world if this gets out. Everything Brennan hopes to accomplish, everything he’s working so hard to achieve, will be gone.
I put my own desires ahead of everything, absolutely everything. Ahead of the nation and the world.
Who the fuck do I think I am?
I’m going to be sick.
I puke on the stairs, bile and dry heaves ripping out my insides. I’m surprised I don’t see blood. There’s enough agony inside me that something must be irreparably broken.
“Ellis to Theriot.”
Fuck. I’m six minutes past when I told Henry I’d be there. I wipe my mouth on my sleeve and force myself to my feet. “On my way.”
I burst out of the stairs on my floor and race to my room. In thirty seconds, I get the key in the door, tear a fresh suit from my closet, and turn on the taps. I take a prostitute’s bath, dragging a washcloth over my armpits and down my thighs and around my cock. I smell Brennan everywhere. He’s down deep in my skin, in my hands and my hair and lips.
I gargle with mouthwash as I run a razor over my face, spit, and then comb my hair while sliding into my new suit pants. Ten seconds later, I’m out the door again, buttoning up my shirt and shoving it into my pants as I run. Anyone who sees me will know. It’s obvious, plainly obvious, that I’m rushing out of a night spent in someone else’s bed.
Which is why, of course, Sheridan is who I run into at the stairwell.
He’s coming out as I’m going in, and we nearly collide. My tie is still undone, and my hair is damp from where I ran wet fingers through it. I still smell like another man. Like Brennan.
Sheridan steadies me. His eyes are too-wide, his face carefully blank. “Henry sent me. Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” I’m trying not to strangle myself with my tie. My hands are violently shaking. “Yeah, I’m good.”
He stares.
“Let’s go.” I clap him on the shoulder and brush past him. After a moment, I hear him follow. I wait one floor down, holding the door for him.
Sheridan doesn’t look at me.
* * *
I bailfrom the morning movements. I can’t face Brennan right now. Not after making love to him all night. Not in front of my detail. I give Henry the lead, put Sheridan at his right hand.
I’m at the UN instead, coordinating Brennan’s arrival amid the furious activity that buzzes behind the scenes. Everyone is already tense, on edge after the stunt the Russians pulled and the weight of today’s session. The air thrums like a plucked guitar string.
I avoid Brennan and the rest of the detail when they arrive, moving from the Security Council chambers to our mobile command center to overwatch and then back to the chambers. Even though I’m not at Brennan’s side, I’m watching his every move. Watching everyone else, too.
I thought I was protective before, when I was only the head of the president’s detail. Now I’ve made love to Brennan. Now I’m the president’s lover.
Now there’s a ferocity inside me that is overwhelming. Blinding. Agonizing.
I don’t slip into the Security Council chambers until everyone has taken their seats. Henry and Sheridan are holding post along the wall, and I join them as the session is called to order.
Henry eyes me. Sheridan still won’t look my way.
Brennan clears his throat. The entire world is watching him. He’s up there, in front of everybody, with my come in his body. I didn’t even use a condom. I fucked him—the president—raw.
My teeth scrape over my bottom lip. I can feel his body move against mine like a ghost stepping over my grave.
You are bad for Brennan Walker.
I fidget, tapping my hands against the wall. Henry shoots me glares, each one darker, until he jams his elbow into my side and leans over. “Fuck is your problem?” he hisses into my ear. “He’s about to speak.”
He begins—
“Ladies and gentlemen, members of the Security Council. My fellow heads of government and state. In our seventy-five-year history in this august body, a call for the leaders of this council to gather has only gone out seven times. In each, we addressed the most serious and significant threats that faced our world. Now, I am asking for this body and the global community to unite again.
