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She’d tricked him into this—just as she’d tricked him into going to that christening yesterday. And now he was paying the price.
She flinched as if he’d struck her. ‘Because I want more than that.’
‘There isn’t any more.’
‘Yes, there is. I love you.’
He heard the words, and felt panic strangle him as the great gaping wounds he’d kept closed for so long were ripped open. ‘Don’t worry, you’ll get over it.’
‘I don’t want to get over it,’ Issy stated, the sharp, searing pain at his dismissal ramming into her body like a blow. It had taken every last ounce of her courage to say the words. Only to have them thrown back at her with barely a moment’s hesitation.
How could he be so callous? This was worse than the last time—much worse.
‘Doesn’t it matter to you at all how I feel?’ she whispered.
‘I told you right from the start I’m not looking for…that.’ He couldn’t even bring himself to say the word. ‘You chose to misinterpret that. Not me.’
She felt numb. Anaesthetised against the pain by shock and disbelief. How could she have been so wrong about him? How could she have been so wrong about everything?
She crossed her arms over her chest, forced her mind to engage. ‘I see,’ she said dully, her voice on autopilot. ‘So this is all my own fault? Is that what you’re saying?’
Suddenly it seemed vitally important that she understand. Why had she made so many mistakes where he was concerned?
‘Issy, for God’s sake.’ He stepped close, tried to take her hand, but she pulled back. ‘I never meant to hurt you. I told you what I wanted—’
‘Why does it always have to be about what you want?’ she interrupted, allowing resentment through to quell the vicious pain. But as she looked at his handsome face, tense with annoyance, she suddenly understood what it was he had always lacked. And the reality of how he’d played her—of how she’d let him play her—became clear.
‘I never realised what a coward you are,’ she said softly.
He stiffened as if she had slapped him. ‘What the hell does that mean?’
She scrubbed the tears off her cheeks with an impatient fist. ‘You say all you want is sex, that relationships don’t matter to you, because you’re too scared to want more.’
‘That’s insane!’ he shouted. But his angry words couldn’t hurt her any more.
He’d never wanted what she had to offer—and that was something she would have to learn to live with. But he hadn’t needed to be so cruel.
They had been friends. She hadn’t imagined that. And maybe one day they could have had more—but he’d thrown it away because he didn’t have the guts to try. And she knew why.
‘Your parents hurt you, Gio. They treated you like a commodity and never gave you the love you deserved. You survived. But you’ll never be truly free until you stop letting what they did rule your life.’
‘This has nothing to do with them,’ he snapped, with the same closed-off expression on his face she had seen so many times before. He still didn’t get it—but, worse than that, she knew now he never would.
‘Doesn’t it?’ she said wearily as she walked past him towards the door.
‘Come back here, dammit.’
She didn’t turn at the shouted words. Didn’t have the strength to argue. What would be the point when she could never win?
‘I’m not going to come chasing after you, Issy, if that’s what all this is supposed to achieve.’
She carried on walking, her heart breaking all over again at the defiant tone.
She had never been the enemy. Why couldn’t he see that?
CHAPTER TEN
‘DO YOU think our new sponsor will want his company’s name on the cover page?’
