AllFreeNovel
Share Us
She’d waited and waited, and finally Carlo had returned. Unusually for him, he had apparently drunk too much.
She’d never seen him have more than an odd glass of wine, perhaps a Scotch at the end of the night. But that evening, he was obviously drunk, and furious.
He’d come home, returned to their room, and said: Marrying you was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done.
She remembered those words now as though he were speaking them into the room. Her heart cracked with fresh pain.
She had turned slowly, shock and pain mingling inside of her in what would become the preeminent emotions of her life. Did I honestly think you would adapt to this lifestyle? That you would be able to become a part of what I do?
Jane echoed her emotions on that painful night. She spun now, as she had then, towards the door. She could see him through the veils of time, as fresh as if he were standing there now. His tuxedo was dishevelled. His bow tie now draped around his neck, hanging in two black tails across his shoulders. His shirt was parted several buttons down, revealing not just the tanned column of his neck, but also the top of his muscular chest. But it was his face that had shocked her. He was furious. Angry. Outraged. Scathing.
It had been the end.
In desperately hoping that the sexually proprietorial regard he felt for her would eventually become love, Jane hadn’t realised that she was hurting him, too. It was not just her own heart and soul at stake. Carlo was hurting just as badly as she was; because he knew what she wanted and needed, and it was something he simply couldn’t give her.
He would never love her like she needed to be loved.
In a clarifying moment, Jane had made her decision. And that decision had released them both from a marriage that seemed only to breed discontent.
She had woken the next morning, after barely any sleep, and dressed in one of her favourite dresses. She ran her hands over her hips now, remembering the softness of the jersey against her skin. She had needed to feel untouchable. Every defence she could muster had been railed around her.
“Jane?” He’d said, when she’d walked stonily into his office. Something had flickered in his face, an emotion she couldn’t comprehend. Perhaps guilt? Regret? She ignored it.
“I’ve come to say goodbye.”
He’d frowned. Just a flicker of surprise. “Goodbye? You are going somewhere?”
Her voice had cracked slightly. “I’m leaving you, Carlo.” She had slid her wedding rings off her finger, and placed them silently onto the timber top of his desk. “Please don’t contact me again. I’ll let your lawyer know once I have a divorce attorney.”
And he had been silent. Surprised, obviously, but silent. He’d stared at her as though he was finally beginning to understand something about her.
“Why?” He’d said, eventually, as he’d s
tood.
“Because we’re going to end up hating each other if we don’t end it.” She’d smiled weakly. “And I don’t hate you. Yet.”
“I don’t hate you either,” he’d said thickly, his dark eyes ravaging her face from across the space of his desk.
“Not yet,” she’d shrugged, a lopsided smile on her cheek. “And I’m not sticking around until you do.”
“You are obfuscating my question. Why are you leaving? Why now?”
Jane had swallowed, and forced herself to meet his eyes. “If not now, when?”
He had made a sound of annoyance. “You are speaking in riddles.”
“What better way to speak about a marriage blessed by the mad hatter?” She shook her head. Grief had made her part deranged. “I saw you last night, Carlo. You were so angry.” She had closed her eyes a little lower. “And you were right. I don’t belong here.” She’d breathed in a gulp of air, to try to calm her nerves. “You should have married her you know. Alessandra would make a far better wife than I do.”
“Alesasandra? I have no idea what makes you think I am interested in Alessandra, but let me assure you, marrying her never entered my mind.”
“But sleeping with her was fine?” Jane demanded hotly, her young, hurt heart like paper in water. Disintegrating beyond all recognition.
Carlo’s dark eyes flashed with the depth of his emotion. “Who I was with before I met you has no bearing on our marriage. It has nothing to do with you.”
Jane had turned away from him, to hide the way his confirmation of Alessandra’s hurtful bragging had seared her core. “You’re wrong.” She took in a fortifying breath and prayed for her strength not to fail her. “It shows me the kind of man you are. That you could make someone love you like she does, and then just callously walk away. You are a horrible bastard. As for me…” Her voice trailed off, as she lifted a shaking hand to her neck. Beneath her fingertips, she could feel the frantic rushing of her pulse. “I don’t know why you married me. But I can honestly say that I wish I’d never met you. I was happy before. Damn it, I was happy.” She dipped her head forward, and closed her eyes. A single tear squeezed out and tilted to the floor. “And I’ll be happy again. As soon as I can forget this disaster ever happened.”
The whole walk out of the Villa, she’d been sure he’d follow her. When he didn’t, she knew ever more that her decision was the right one. Being married to someone who didn’t care enough to fight for you was a horrible fate.
