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He chuckles and I sneak a quick peek, greeted by his smile. It’s hard not to smile looking at his. “Well considering how trashed you got, I’m surprised you are up and moving.” Christ, how embarrassing. My face heats up and the cushion next to me dips from him sliding over. “Brooklyn, you are so damn cute when you blush like that.”
I close my eyes and let myself enjoy the attention I’ve always craved from Hank. Shit, Hank. “Fitz, you know we can only be friends right?” I ask, even though in my head I’m screaming for so much more.
“Brooklyn, I’m not pushing you to do anything. I know you’re with Hank, I get that. I can’t say I’m happy about it, but that’s because I think you deserve a hell of a lot more.” He wraps his a
rm around me and I rest my head on his chest. “Friends it is.” He doesn’t let go, in fact he tightens his hold. I don’t pull away, I sink into him and inhale his manly scent. It feels good, too good. I close my eyes and just for a second let myself pretend I belong here.
The door opens letting me know Poppy and Nate are back. I pull away from him so fast that I fall off the couch, landing on my ass. “Holy shit, Brooklyn, are you alright?” Fitz asks, jumping up to help me off the floor.
I don’t accept his help though, I pick myself up and shake my head. “I’m fine.” I start walking away and mumble, “Excuse me.”
Closing myself in the bedroom, I glance out the window at the bustling city around me. What the hell am I doing? Maybe I should just cut this trip short and go back to what I know, where I actually do belong. Being here for just one day, has my head all messed up. I’m thinking things I shouldn’t be, feeling things I definitely shouldn’t be and doing nothing but embarrassing myself in the process.
A light knock on the door makes my stomach drop. “Hey Brooklyn, it’s me,” Poppy says and I tell her to come in. She walks over to me and rests her head on my shoulder. “Want to talk about it?”
“Not really.” I say, keeping my focus outside.
She doesn’t push me, she simply nods her head. “You know I’d never push you to do anything right? Like if you aren’t comfortable with something, all you need to do is tell me.”
I move to the side and she straightens herself. I cross my arms and raise my eyebrows. “Oh really, because last night when I said I didn’t want to do that shot, you were just as bad as everyone else. You know I’m not used to this shit. I mean, my God, I’m sitting in your living room wrapped around a fucking rock star.”
“Oh my God, you guys were like cuddling?” she asks, getting a huge smile on her face.
My mouth falls open and I shoot her a glare. “Are you fucking kidding me? It’s not cute Poppy. Everything I’m feeling for Fitz is wrong. I have a boyfriend,” I moan out, sinking down onto the bed, covering my face with my hands. She once again doesn’t say anything, just sits next to me and after a few minutes I pull my hands away from my face. I turn my head to look at her and she looks down at me with sadness. “Why does it feel so good then?” I ask, the fight long gone.
“Oh Brooklyn,” she says and holds my hand. “Sweetie, maybe it feels so good because it’s what you really want. I know you’re with Hank and that you’ve got the perfect little life going on, but maybe deep down, you want more. Maybe Fitz is more.”
“He wants to take me somewhere and I told him yes. What the hell am I doing?” I ask, because maybe she’s right. Maybe I do want more.
“I think you need to stop beating yourself up. You are on vacation. Enjoy yourself and stop worrying so much. No one is going to think any less of you if you hang out with Fitz. Go out, have fun,” she says, getting up off the bed. “The guys need to get to the studio. Do you want to come along?”
I think about it for a minute before I sit up. “Yes, I’d love to go.” She smiles and starts walking to the door. I jump up and grab her arm, stopping her. “Do you think I’ll have time to stop by here before Fitz takes me out? I don’t exactly want to go looking like this?”
“Brooklyn, I think Fitz would wait all night for you.”
I nod my head and take a deep breath as I follow her back out. I need to stop looking like a damn fool in front of Fitz. Even though I know nothing will happen with him, I’ve made up my mind that I am going to enjoy this time in New York with him. While I’m here, I’m Brooklyn. I have the rest of my life to be Brooke.
I won’t lie, when Brooklyn pulled away from me like that, I was pissed. I have no idea where her head is, but fuck mine is consumed with her. Since last night, I’ve thought of nothing but her and I’m not used to having someone act this way around me. Even before Renegade, I never had to try very hard to get a girl’s attention. With Brooklyn, it’s like I have it one minute and lose it the next. It’s confusing and frustrating, but when she came back out of the bedroom and apologized, I simply accepted. Maybe I’m the fool here. Maybe I’m setting myself up for defeat, but when I look at her, I don’t give a shit.
We just got to the studio and as Poppy and Nate walk in, I hang back and wait for Brooklyn. She smiles at me and says, “You don’t need to wait for me.”
I wink at her and nudge her shoulder with mine. “I know I don’t need to, I want to.”
We walk into the spacious foyer and Brooklyn’s eyes pop. Her head swivels as she tries to take it all in. “Yeah, it’s a little extravagant, but we hang out here a lot. Let me show you around.”
I walk her past the black leather wrap-around sectional which sits surrounding a large eighty inch plasma TV. When we reach the small bar and kitchenette, she laughs.
“What’s so funny?” I ask as I lean an arm along the bar.
“This place is like some Rock-n-Roll hall of fame.”
I grin, nodding my head to the door leading into a hallway as I bring her to the sound booth. Obviously the recording studio is on the other side of the sound booth. We walk into the sound booth and everyone is there.
“Damn, nice of you guys to join us. Can we just listen to this and get the hell out of here? I have plans tonight,” Ethen says, giving me a pointed look.
“Don’t be an asshole,” I growl at him.
“Don’t leave me hanging for forty five minutes,” Ethen growls back, standing up. I’d kick his ass in a heartbeat, so I’m not sure where he’s getting the balls to come at me like this.
