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I jump, yelping slightly at Oliver’s voice. "Fuck."
He circles around the table so he’s in front of me, a mix of guilt and amusement on his face. “Sorry."
"I'm fine. It's fine." I blow out a breath and smooth my fair, trying to calm my racing heart.
"Right." He draws out the word.
I shrug. “I’m as fine as I can be in this situation."
"Have you heard back from anyone?" Oliver asks.
I shake my head and scowl at my computer. “No. I'm still waiting."
"Well, why don't you help me out for a bit?” He gestures back towards the main part of the library. “Maybe it'll take your mind off of everything."
I frown. “Help how?"
"Shelving books, checking them out, maybe a Storytime or game later?"
“Do you really think it's a good idea for me to interact with the public today?" I raise a skeptical brow.
He raises one right back. “Do you think you should hide instead?"
"Well, no, but..."
He interrupts. “I’ll stay close and look at it this way... not that many alphas come in here."
I groan, snickering a little. “That's actually more depressing."
He chuckles. “I know. But they have important things to do instead of something soft like reading. They have nails to chew and walls to punch."
I laugh, some of the stress finally pushed to the back of my mind for the time being.
Oliver sobers suddenly. “You don't think I'm a hypocrite, do you?"
I blink at him. “What?"
He grimaces. “Making fun of alphas, when I have one of my own? I'm not like you, bucking against the system, determined to stay bondless and free."
My heart hurts for him, for all omegas. “Wanna know a secret?"
He brightens a bit, his expression curious. “Always. I love secrets."
"I used to want a bond and a pack and even an alpha. I wanted that life of family and care and comfort."
"What changed?"
I look away from him, my eyes unfocused. “I stopped believing in fairy tales. The why doesn't matter, but I wasn't formed in the womb as a rebel. It's why I'm so fascinated with biology and anthropology. And why I believe the shit we're told is bullshit. My life experiences changed my desires. They affect what I do, what I want, what I believe. But I don't judge you or any omega who is able to find happiness inside a pack or with an alpha. Sometimes I envy all of you. And it doesn't make you a fucking hypocrite. You can still believe in and fight for omegas’ rights and agency without giving up on your relationship with an alpha. It doesn’t mean you have to only have relationships with betas or remain alone to be considered an integral part of the movement. Robin herself has three fucking alphas, no one treats her like a hypocrite."
He blinks rapidly, clearing the emotion from his eyes. “Thank you."
I reach out and squeeze his arm. “You have nothing to thank me for. It's the truth. Besides, this fight isn't just about getting rid of the OCP or helping omegas who are still unattached. This fight is for all omegas, whether they want the help or not. No matter how old they are or if they’re brainwashed, they still deserve the right to choose whatever life they want and they still deserve freedoms inside of those relationships."
Oliver gazes at me with awe on his face. “You're amazing."
I duck my head, cheeks heating. “Sorry. You really should have already learned not to start conversations like this because I don't know when to shut up."
He releases that husky chuckle that does things to my insides. “I like it when you get up on your soapbox. It's hot."
