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I laughed again, this time sounding a bit crazier than before.
Yeah, that might work. Let him know I was down-to-fuck, but suggest he look for someone with more childcare experience.
After all, I needed to find a job where I could take advantage of my degree, right?
I swallowed a large gulp of wine.
So, my options were to take a job as a glorified babysitter with a gorgeous complete stranger and his fucking adorable son, or stay in my current situation.
Slowly dying inside with each item I swiped over the scanner, watching my future slip away just like the item as it traveled down the conveyor belt.
Oh, and paying $300 a month more in rent with a paycheck that most definitely wasn’t increasing.
I thought about calling my parents, but I knew they’d do two things right off the bat.
First, they’d tell me I needed to be more serious about my job search.
Second, they’d immediately tell me to forget the nanny idea.
Honestly, I should have just forgotten about it, but I couldn’t get Hayden’s and Jack’s faces out of my head.
I didn’t want my parents telling me to forget it. I wanted them to tell me they were proud of me and I should do what makes me happy.
And would being a nanny make me happy?
I drained the rest of my wine.
Holding Jack had made me happy.
Looking at Hayden had made me happy.
If I took the job, I’d have to be professional and not hit on him.
Right?
He’d obviously not offered me the job as a pick-up line.
In actuality, Hayden had likely gotten home and completely rethought the whole situation. Poor guy had been so frazzled, he’d probably just blurted out the offer and was now at home with a sleeping Jack, regretting his impulsive stupidity.
If I was being fair to him, I’d call and cancel.
Opting to sleep on it, I cleaned up the mess from dinner, polished off the rest of the wine straight from the bottle, and collapsed into bed.
Maybe I’d call Marissa tomorrow and see what she thought.
Of course, my best friend was always encouraging me to live a little, so she maybe wasn’t the best to get a level, well-thought-out answer from.
Sleep came easily thanks to the wine.
However, the next morning, I woke up with images of Jack and Hayden in my head. I hadn’t been so infatuated in…well, probably in my entire life. I’d dated a few guys seriously, but none of them had held my attention. Truly, I’d spent more time daydreaming over Hayden in the short amount of time since I’d met him than I’d ever really spent thinking about any of the guys I’d actually dated.
I called Marissa.
She listened while I explained the situation.
Then she gave me a very non-Marissa type answer.
“Lex, you know I love you and I want the best for you. Part of me thinks this does sound crazy, especially for you, and I want to tell you you only live once. But another part of me thinks this is the most excited you’ve sounded in a long time. Even if the nanny thing doesn’t work out, I think this is a sign you need a change. Go to the meeting. Hear the specifics, answer his questions, find out the salary.”
