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Charlie curses under his breath. “It's ok. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push.”
I shake my head. “No, I just…”
His gaze traces the outline of my body, and he sighs. “You’re still in love with Luke.”
I don’t want to answer because the truth will hurt him. But I don’t have to. He turns around, gripping the back of his neck with both hands as he gazes over the open field and lets out a frustrated sigh. He drops his arms and faces me.
“I’ll got get our stuff.” He disappears around the corner without a backwards glance, and I let the tears flow.Shit. I don’t want to hurt Charlie, either. What a mess.
He appears and tosses stuff in the truck bed and hands me the camera case before opening my door for me. We’re both quiet the twenty minutes back to the farm. He parks the truck in the barn and sighs before turning to me. The cabin light turns off before he speaks.
“I’m sorry, Liv. I shouldn’t have let it get this far.”
I frown as his words echo my thoughts. “You did nothing wrong, Charlie. This is my fault.”
He shakes his head. “Just promise me you won’t hate me when this is all over.”
I frown. “I would never hate you.”
We stare at each other for a long moment. “I don’t know if I can stay away from you,” he says.
“We just need to slow things down.”
He sighs. “Ok. I can do that.” He takes my hand and kisses my knuckles and my heart twists as the memories of Luke assault me.
The cabin floods with light as he opens the door. He walks me to the porch and presses his lips to mine for a gentle kiss before he heads to his apartment.
I head to bed and lay staring out at the stars through my window for hours. After Luke dumped me, I never thought I’d want another man like I wanted him. Charlie is nothing like Luke. There was no time altering moment when we kissed for the first time. He didn’t make me forget the world existed. But he makes me feel wanted and safe.
I roll onto my back and close my eyes. I haven’t dreamt of Luke since that first time I kissed Charlie, but it doesn’t take long for him to appear. He sits on the edge of my bed, looking down at me. “Hey beautiful,” he whispers and leans down to place a gentle kiss on my lips. I ignore the buzz at our touch, but here in my dream world, I don't have to hide my feelings. Tears stream down my face.
He shifts to face me and wipes my tears away with his thumb. “Does he make you happy?” he whispers.
I didn’t know dream Luke had a memory. But if he’s a figment of my imagination, why wouldn’t he?
“Yes. He does. But…”
I sit up and lean against the headboard. He moves closer to me and I take his hand. “I want to move on with Charlie. But I’m scared I’ll never be able to let you go.”
He frowns and the pain I see hurts my heart. He doesn't speak so I continue.
“My parents are back together. Dad forgave her.”
“That’s great.”
“Is it? What if she breaks his heart again?”
“Sutton hearts are the strongest things on this planet. I’m convinced.”
Another tear slides down my cheek, but I smile. “Yea, we’re pretty badass.”
He chuckles. “The baddest of badasses.”
I sigh and take my hand back. “Even the strongest things on the planet have a breaking point.”
He puts his finger under my chin and stares into my soul. “I’m so sorry I hurt us. It’s my fault and I’ll forever pay the price for it. But if you let me, I’ll prove to you that I’ll never let you down again. I’ve been giving you space, hoping you’ll realize that you can’t move on from me because you’re not supposed to. I know you’re scared, baby. But you don’t have to be. Please, let me in again. I’m drowning without you.”
The pain in his gaze mirrors my own as a lump forms in my throat. He rests his forehead against mine and closes his eyes. “I was wrong for leaving you. You’re safest when you’re with me,” he whispers.Then he’s gone.
Garrett opens my door and I startle awake. Instead of moving on, he pauses. “You good?”
I glance at the clock. I forgot to set my alarm for our morning run.
“Yea.” He frowns, but leaves me be.
I loved every little thing about Luke. The way his eyes twinkled at a dirty joke. The way my hand fit in his. He let me into his world and gave me a family I didn’t know I needed.
Nobody could ever love me the way he can. But is it worth more potential heartache? My heart urges me to forgive him, buy my head tells me it would be another disaster. Which is interesting, because my heart took the brunt of the blow, and it’s willing to take another hit, proving dream Luke right.
I sigh in frustration and remind myself that real Luke didn’t say those words. He isn’t here trying to win me back. Meanwhile, a good man who’s never hurt me is interested in exploring more. Doesn’t he deserve a chance? I still don’t have an answer when I crawl out of bed to get dressed for our run.
