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ISLA
The drive home is fun; Bodie and Lochlan play I spy, and of course when Loch says he’s hungry again Bodie agrees so we can stop. What does he want to eat though? Ice cream of course, so we end up going to this cute little ice cream shop and sitting on the patio. When he and Bodie are done eating theirs, I go to put Lochlan in the car, when Bodie stops halfway to the car.
“Hey, I’ll be right there, Angel.”
“Okay. I’m just going to get him buckled in,” I call back while getting Lochlan settled in his seat and turning on one of the individual portable DVD players that magically appeared in my car overnight, complete with different character headphones for each kid. I don’t know if my grandmother or one of the guys did it, but neither would surprise me at this point. I’m settling into my seat and getting the music turned on when Bodie opens the door and slides in with a full cup holder with three more ice creams, and a snow cone.
“I’m guessing those aren’t for your brothers?” I ask, raising my eyebrow at him.
“Nope,” he smirks, popping the ‘p’. “I couldn’t get Lochlan some and not the other two. I got Vivi the unicorn cone, Arden the dirt and worms, your grandmother has a weakness for snow cones, and Odin is there waiting on me to take me to my truck and he likes hot fudge sundaes.”
“Y'all are going to make them spoiled. You don’t have to buy stuff for them to like y'all, you know,” I say hesitantly. I’m still not used to being able to actually speak my mind for any reason. It’s strange not worrying about getting hit for “talking back”.
He just smiles at me. “We know we don’t have to, Angel, but we want to spoil them, we want to make them happy. We aren’t trying to buy their love, or yours. We are just trying to show you four that y'all matter and are worth being loved. I know we are taking things slow and just being friends, but we are still going to show you how you should have been treated all these years. We want to show you all that you’re worth everything.”
Staring ahead at the road in front of me, I wipe tears from my eyes while trying to pay attention to driving. I open and close my mouth like a fish trying to decide how to respond to him, not knowing what to think about these men. They show up one day and turn our lives upside down, have been there for me and the kids more in a few days than their dad ever was, but they haven’t asked for anything in return.
“I can’t tell you how thankful I am for you and your brothers. I can’t promise anything, but I do want to get to know you, and them. Y'all were so amazing with everything that happened yesterday, and I have never had any help with the kids when they were sick or hurt. It was nice having that.”
He reaches over and squeezes my thigh. “Hopefully Angel, you’ll never have to worry about it again.”
I give him a smile. “We can hope.”
The rest of the drive is quiet. When we get back to my house Odin’s police car is there. Bodie grabs the ice cream while I get Lochlan out of the car, and as soon as I set him down he runs to the front door, meaning I have to rush after him to open it.
“MAW-MAW! ARDEN! VIVI!” Lochlan screeches.
“In the kitchen baby!” I hear Maw-Maw call back.
He goes running that way with me and Bodie following him. When we get to the kitchen, Lochlan is getting hugs from my grandmother and his siblings, after which he runs over to Odin and raises his arms to be picked up.
He smiles as he lifts Lochlan for a huge hug. “Hey buddy! I am so glad you're okay. How are you feeling?”
Wiggling his feet to be set down, my son replies, “Good! Mommy and Bodie got me ice cream! It was yummy in my tummy, and Bodie got some for y’all too!”
“We get ice cream too?” Arden asks excitedly.
“Yeah bud, I got ice cream for all of you. I got you worms in dirt,” he says, handing them out to everyone. “Vivi, I got you a unicorn cone, Ms. Emma, I got you a snow cone…”
I grab Odin’s sundae and pass it to him. “And an ice cream sundae for you,” I tell him, snatching the cherry off the top and popping it into my mouth.
He balks at me, “That’s my favorite part!”
Grinning cheekily at him, I reply, “Whoops! Sorry, not sorry!”
He lunges at me looking like he’s going to tickle me, but it doesn’t fully register to me that he’s not trying to hurt me, so I'm pulled into a flashback.
No! PUNCH.
This isn’t real.KICK.
He’s dead.
I keep reliving all the terrible things that happened to me over and over. My body is running on instinct and survival and I can’t pull myself out of the awful memories plaguing me.
“ISLA! Baby come on, come back to me.”
I know that voice. That’s not Corin’s voice, but… I can’t place it.
