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“Like a tribe,” Lewis said. “Tribes that go from town to town.”
Sam lifted Lewis to his shoulder for a better view. “Something like that. For the time being, this is our home.” Beau reached his arms for a turn and by the time they both had their fill, we were reaching waters too shallow to continue.
This boat was large enough for everyone, but we had to forage for what was available on the island and try to make a home on land. There was a lot of work ahead of us, but I would do it with Sam, and that made it all worth it. There was a smaller inflatable that we paddled to the shore after anchoring the boat. We could swim the distance, but everyone was half broken. Later we would search for a harbor or cover, but our getaway boat could bob out at sea for now.
Sam’s muscles bulged through his shirt as he paddled. Over the past few hours, I realized Sam and I were now free to be alone again as a couple. Luke was pushing along with his good arm, and Lori admired the view. BeLew reached their arms over the sides, skimming the water with their fingertips. When we made it to shore, we all pulled the boat onto the sand, careful to keep it out of the current.
Once settled, I saw the devastation this island had taken. Broken houses laid everywhere a few steps inland. Pieces of wood lay scattered across the grass and flattened trees. This used to be someone’s home. People got married here, raised their children here, and loved each other here. Splintered lumber and garbage were all that remained.
And broken wood.
My voice raised in a question as the memory returned. “BeLew is this what you saw? Is this the shore of broken wood?”
No answer as I scanned the devastation. “BeLew,” I repeated, but they were staring at the sand, at the shore. I looked down and saw the blood. It made spiderwebs of red on my still wet feet. It was coming from inside me, running down my leg.
The tears came easily this time. After holding them back for months, and the freedom I felt only a moment ago, they flowed down my cheeks at the horror of what I was seeing.
“Sam,” I whimpered, and he lifted me and carried me to a spot of grass. Lori found a blanket in the dingy and laid it out across the ground.
“It’s okay,” Sam whispered, moving me to the blanket.
“No, it isn’t okay. This is bad. I saw this, but it wasn’t like this. I never thought it would be this.”
“Shhh, baby.”
Luke cleared his throat and tapped Sam on the shoulder. They spoke for a minute and Sam returned.
“Luke has medical training. He delivered a few babies on Thalassa. Could you let him check you out?”
I nodded and swallowed the lump in my throat. Then I prayed this baby would survive. I prayed I could hold it and raise it with Sam and BeLew. I prayed for all the things I never allowed myself to want. Lori pulled the excess of the blanket over me and told the boys to sit by my head. Her sons stood far back, and she let them explore where we could see them.
Luke was gentle, but the pain still carried through my body. I didn’t know if it was from my hip or losing this baby, but my entire middle felt like someone had hit me with a baseball bat. More silence and he examined me, and when he was done, he told me to rest on my left side and try to relax. “It’s very possible this is bleeding from exertion. Lori said you crashed on a railing. The placenta could have shifted. I don’t think it’s placenta previa. The bleeding seems to have stopped. All we can do now is have you rest and wait.”
Luke took Lori by the hand, and they walked to the water to give us a moment. He may be common sense dumb, but he was a skilled nurse. I said another prayer.
“We should name her,” I said. “It’s good luck. My baby Samuel came back to me. His love, I think, is in you. It’s different, but the same, you know. That sounds crazy, right?”
“No, not crazy. And yes, I think we should name the baby. Are you so sure it’s a girl?”
“No,” I admitted. “But the name I want, it won’t matter.”
“Whatever you want.” His eyes were tearing. It scared him, the possibility that this could be it. We could lose her today, and that almost felt like our journey was for nothing. We loved her, and the thought of one more death, especially this one, might be too much for me.
“The name I give her, she will make it. We are having a healthy, beautiful baby. A perfect baby girl, I think.”
He chuckled and wiped his eyes. “You seem so set on a girl. What’s the name?”
I touched my hand to my stomach and smiled. BeLew brought their little hands to the side of my belly and did the same. I met their gaze and spoke to them so they knew everything would be okay.
“I’m naming her after my sister. I want to name her Morgan, boys. Do you know what the name Morgan means?”
The boys gave excited nods, rocking my belly slightly.
“Will you tell Sam?”
Beau cleared his throat, and Lewis looked at his brother with pride. Beau had grown braver and more confident each day. “It means ‘from the sea’.”
Sam clapped his hand on Beau’s shoulder. “The perfect name for her. It’s the most perfect gift your mother gave us. Her name and her spirit. Although, it still could be a boy. Either way, it’s perfect.”
“Oh, no,” Lewis interjected. “It’s a girl. We saw her. And yeah, she’s perfect. She has our mom’s eyes. I know you are upset about the blood, mamma, but everything will be fine. She cries a lot, but we are pretty excited. You cry a lot too when she’s born.”
Beau interrupted his brother, “But why are you in the way back of the island when she comes? Your legs get all cut up by the trees when you take the shortcut back home to have her.”
The thud as Sam fell over was enough to break the boy’s attention and giggle in his direction. My focus stayed on them. They were beyond perfect.
There was something about how clear their visions were. It was more than I could comprehend. I was leagues behind their capabilities. A flash came into my mind. It was the first time that happened when I was awake.
The image was of the boys holding Morgan wrapped in a blanket. They sat on a plywood floor with grins stretched across their faces. Their cheeks held less baby fat and just as much joy. She was curled up in their arms with heavy eyes.
She was blonde, sleepy, safe, and ours.
