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Kit and I were going to have a baby.
The process was going to be long—it wouldn’t be tomorrow, it wouldn’t be next week, hell, it might not even be this year. Still itwasgoing to happen.
My hand unconsciously floated to my stomach, caressing the flat firmness of it, my mind drifting, trying to imagine what it would be like slowly growing with a child inside.
I’d come to realize that the likeliness that it would ever happen was almost slim to none, but it didn’t upset me as much now as it would have a few weeks ago. Kit and I were still going to get the baby that we wanted, but it was just going to happen a little differently.
It wouldn’t change how much we loved it.
It wouldn’t change how we brought it up and the morals we taught it.
It wouldn’t change who it was.
It was still going to be a piece of us.
“So you don’t even get to see what they look like?” Tie asked with a frown on his face.
Harmony and I had been to the surrogacy clinic a few days ago and Lisa, the lady who was overseeing our surrogacy, had handed us a pile of folders to look over for potential women who we feel we might vibe with I guessed. Then information would be given to them and we hope that they see something they like too.
“Why does it matter what she looks like? They do health checks and all that, so we know they’re capable of carrying the baby,” I explain as I flick over a few that I know won’t work.
Some have huge careers and talk about not finishing work until well into the pregnancy. That won’t work for me—I want complete dedication. Maybe that makes me selfish, but fuck, it’s my child they’re going to be growing.
Tally scoffed from his seat on the sofa. “This chick is out.”
I frowned. “How come?”
He holds up the file. “She’s a vegan.”
I laughed, snatching the file from him and scanning over it. “That doesn’t make her a bad person.”
He shook his head. “I don’t want a woman who ain’t gonna sit down and eat a steak or a thick as fuck hamburger with all the fillings.”
Eyeing each of the boys who were crowded into my office, I decided I needed to make something completely clear. “Whoever we choose… they’re off limits.”
Mix and Rifle chuckled quietly but nodded their heads, while Tie rolled his eyes and continued flicking through the papers on his lap.
“Man, you’re no fun,” Tally joked. “This girl is gonna be around twenty-four-seven, and you’re putting a no touching order on her. Fuck, what if she’s gorgeous or fucking stunning. What if she’s Old Lady material?”
Leaning across my desk, I reached out and slapped my brother around the back of his head. “This person is gonna be growing my fucking child. Like I want the first thing it’s gonna see, to be your cock.”
The rest of my brothers’ laughter filled the room.
“Scar the fucking kid for life that would, before it’s even born!” Mix commented, holding his stomach as he laughed.
The room grew silent with the sounds of flipping paper the only noises in the air.
“You’re really doing this,” Tie said finally, and I looked up to see his eyes meeting mine across the desk.
I dropped the file I was holding and scratched at my unshaven face. “Yeah. We’ve lost too much already, man,” I said softly, the eyes of my men coming to me with looks of sympathy. “What if we tried again and this time, I lost them both?”
Mix nodded in understanding. “This is safe. You’re doing it the right way.”
I lifted my chin in thanks for his support. I knew my family would be behind me, even though some of them didn’t quite understand the process, or exactly why we’d chosen to do things this way.
At some point, I knew most of my brothers would want kids. It was like passing a piece of them down the line, not only to ensure the club’s future but maybe also to keep their memory alive. While we were out of the majority of illegal dealings that brought danger into the club, we were still outlaws—men who lived by our own rules and laws.
A lot of people didn’t like that. And along with the power we held in our hands, it put a target on our backs.
