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There’s nothing going on with Holden. I mean, sure, I kissed him, but he didn’t reciprocate, and I was tipsy, and it just seemed fun? I barely made the decision to do it; my body just reacted. It would never happen again, and just because itdidhappen once doesn’t mean it meant anything.
“You don’t like, I don’t know,” she says, biting her lip, “someone at school?”
“Just say what’s on your mind, Corrine.”
She bites her lip harder, and that’s when I notice how watery her eyes have gotten.Great.This conversation is about to end with no resolution, just to be brought up again, at another uncomfortable time.
I grab her shoulders, refusing to tiptoe around this anymore. “What’s wrong?”
A tear leaks out, but her mascara and eyeliner stay in place. The perfect visualization of Corrine Baker. Put together no matter what. “I’m sorry. I just don’t believe you.”
“You’re my best friend. I would tell you if I was having fuzzy feelings for someone.”
“Even if it was Holden?” She blinks her eyes dry. “I’m notmad if so. I guess I’ve just been... jealous?”
Despite the uptick in my heart rate, I tilt my head to the side, brushing her hair from her face. “Of what?”
“I barely see you these days and it’s because you’re with my ex-boyfriend. We don’t talk a lot anymore. It... plays games with my head. I’m happy with Logan, but he’s my boyfriend, not my best friend.”
“You know,you’realso superbusy.” Then I realize it sounds like I’m blaming her, and that’s the last thing I want to do, not when I kissed her ex-boyfriend, not when she’s felt like I abandoned her. “We just need to have some time together. Maybe a spa day?”
She sniffles. “You hate spa days.”
“Well, yeah, they’re invasive and kind of gross, but I’d do one for you.”
“Thank you.” She hugs me. “Does that include mani-pedis?”
“Don’t push it,” I grumble, rubbing her back.
“If you didn’t pick at your hangnails, they wouldn’t be so bloody every time.”
“Now is not the time for this lecture.”
“You’re right,” she says, straightening with a smile. “If you’re not interested in someone, then now is the time for you to hook up with that guy you don’t like as a power move.”
Shit.Something sinks in my gut. “No...” I look over my shoulder at Victor and find that he’s staring back at me. “I think that would be—”
“A great idea.” She crosses her arms. “When was the last time you had an orgasm?”
“Oh mygod, Corrine.” My cheeks heat and I try to play offthe conversation, but she stares me down. “I don’t know. I don’t keep track of that.” And if I did, I wouldn’t find this to be the time or place to discuss it.
“Clearly it hasn’t been recently, then. Don’t you masturbate?”
“What’s happening, pals?” Kayla slings her arms around Corrine and me.
“Corrine is forcing me to talk about my masturbation habits. Would you care to join?”
Corrine separates herself from us. “What we were actually talking about is how there’s a cute guy staring at Saine and she won’t go talk to him.” She jabs her thumb over her shoulder. “She’s not in a relationship, she’s not into anyone, there’s no reason not to.”
Kayla squeezes me tight against her, protective. “If she doesn’t want to, what’s it matter?”
“I’m in a relationship now. I have to live vicariously through you for weird party hookup stories.”
“Why don’tyoujust have a weird party hookup?” Kayla asks, nearly slopping her drink on me as someone pushes by us.
“It’s not the same if it’s with your boyfriend, and I’m not a cheater.”
“Fine, fine. I’ll take one for the team,” I lie like a lying liar. She says she’s fine, she says it’s okay, but I feel like she’s pushing pushing pushing me to prove that I do or do not like Holden. The problem is... The problem is that I don’t know. I’m scared to look too closely to find out.
