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Chapter 36
After helping Lily onto the post coach with a bandage around her head and enough money to get her back to Italy—and a bodyguard in Ames who would assure Giulia through writing that her mother had made it on the boat and sailed away—Giulia returned to Halstead with the distinct feeling that she had aged about fourteen years.
Any future potential of a relationship with her mother was now at a complete end, and while there was a sense of catharsis to that farewell, it was bittersweet as well. It was only natural to mourn the loss of one’s mother in one’s life, even if she had never been present to begin with.
Giulia wished she had not ruined the ball for Nick, but he had been immensely supportive through the entire ordeal. Most of the guests hadn’t realized he’d gone missing at all when he arrived back with Giulia on his arm—after Giulia’s hair was braided again, of course, her silk gown changed into a plain green evening gown Madame Chastain had managed to deliver with the ball gown, and her mother safely deposited in one guarded room, and Jack in another.
Jack had been sent to the magistrate first thing the following morning and taken into custody, unlikely to come away from the confines of prison again. His dark eyes haunted her, the jealousy and greed lurking within them forever searing her mind. She mourned the loss of Nick’s friend but praised heaven he’d been apprehended before he could do any real harm. Aside from Nick’s shoulder, of course, which had almost healed to perfection.
“All packed?” Giulia asked Tilly as she moved into her room, removing her bonnet and swinging it onto the bed.
“Yes,” the maid answered. “Thank you again for taking me with you, Miss Pepper. I promise I won’t let you down.” Tilly gushed and Giulia could not help the smile that spread over her face.
“Lord Hart insisted, Tilly, and I am glad he did. I could not survive without you.”
“You are too kind, miss.”
Giulia reached forward and grasped Tilly’s hand. “I am not being kind, Tilly. You earned the job as lady’s maid when you helped me into that gown and fixed my hair for the ball. Madame Chastain will not make me gowns I can fasten myself. I need you, and I am thrilled you accepted the position.”
Tilly beamed and Giulia pulled her in for a hug. The maid covered a suspicious sniffle and Giulia turned away to afford her privacy.
The earl had taken her departure with a blank face and tone of voice void of feeling. She’d felt hurt for a moment, but the man was covering his emotions as well as he hid his face with an overgrown beard and bushy eyebrows. The strides they’d made since her arrival were considerable progress, and she was only going to be a few miles away at Mabel’s home. Their relationship did not have to be at an end yet.
Nick, on the other hand, was taking the transition far too well. She had the sense he knew why she was leaving, the independence she needed to exercise. She let out a breath. And regardless, the more formal of a relationship she had with Nick, the sooner she would be able to move on.
Wells appeared in the doorway. “Miss Sheffield to see you.”
“Wonderful! Thank you, Wells,” Giulia said as she followed him into the corridor and down to the parlor. Mabel sat in the chair near the window and stood upon Giulia’s entrance.
“Are you ready?” Mabel asked.
“I am,” Giulia said softly as she stepped toward her friend. “Are you certain this is not an inconvenience?”
A grin spread over Mabel’s face as she looked down to Giulia, pure kindness written in her expression. “Do not back out on me now,” Mabel said in mock seriousness. “I am looking forward to your company far too much. My grandmother is near deaf and my sister is a tiny rascal. I could use a force of reason to keep me sane.”
Fully gratified, Giulia nodded. She watched the footmen carry her trunk and valise to the carriage outside, as well as the three additional boxes Madame Chastain had delivered the day before. The earl was anonymously adding more gowns to her after-mourning wardrobe—she was not supposed to know but Madame Chastain had told her—and she was delighted by the colors which had been added back into her daily wear. At the moment she donned a butter yellow walking dress and a matching— “Oh, Mabel, I left my bonnet upstairs. Would you mind waiting while I run up to retrieve it?”
“Not at all.”
With quick feet Giulia rushed toward her room, considering the cold stone walls and massive tapestries that had somehow began to feel warm and comforting over the course of her time at Halstead. They had begun to feel like home. She passed the corridor that would lead her to her father’s tower and turned away regrettably.
It was not her last time in the castle, she reminded herself. She would be back.
Giulia turned toward her bedchamber and came up short when she found Nick sitting on the edge of her bed, the yellow ribbon trimmed bonnet swinging from his fingers. He glanced up and gave her a halfhearted smile that hardly touched his lips at all.
“This is not goodbye, Nick,” she said as she hovered in the doorway. She felt the unmistakable pull that linked them, and would always link them, or so she assumed. But stepping any closer was dangerous if she was to remember that they were to remain friends. She laughed lightly to dispel the heaviness in the air. “I am sure I will see you again soon.”
He stood, walking toward her and pausing just out of reach. “Of course. Robert would not let you leave forever. Not now that he has his mother’s spirit and spice back in his life.”
“No,” she agreed. “Nor would I choose to leave permanently. I look forward to regular visits.” She gave him an amiable smile. “We shall remain friends.”
“Regular visits,” Nick repeated. “Friends.” He said the word as if he was trying it out on his tongue for the first time and wasn’t certain he liked the way it tasted. His eyes were fastened on her firmly and she found she could hardly breathe under his direct gaze.
She reached a hand for her bonnet, but he put his own in it instead, squeezing her fingers. She caught sorrow in his eyes and wanted to laugh at the absurdity. He had been so understanding before. What had gotten into him? “Really, Nick, I am only going to be a few miles away.”
“What do you mean?” he asked quietly, hope surging in his vivid eyes.
“You said you knew,” she reminded him, confusion drawing her eyebrows together. “I am only going to live with Mabel.”
