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He’s the opposite of me in every way, and it’s exactly what I need.
“You’re going to hate me tomorrow,” he whispers while I see my grief reflecting in his eyes.
“Like you said, there’s no need to worry about feelings getting hurt. Let me hate you so I can focus on it, instead of the despair eating away at me.”
He presses a tender kiss to my lips. When he pulls back, he stares into my eyes with so much intensity it sucks me in until I fade away and there’s only him.
Jaxson West - the enigma with the body of an angel and the soul of the devil.
“If that’s what it takes for you to deal, then hate me, Doc. Hate me if it helps you cope.”
Our mouths collide and as his hand covers my breast, and I’m touched for the first time, I don’t revel in the feel of it. Instead, I feed off the hatred I’m supposed to have for this man. I hate him because I need him more than the air I breathe.
I need him to help me stay sane.
I need him to ground me as my world spins terrifyingly out of control.
“I need you,” I whisper as he bites the skin beneath my jawline.
His hand trails over my ribs and stomach and slips between my legs. This time feelings flutter to life in my stomach as his fingers explore me.
He leaves a trail of kisses from my neck back to my mouth. As he pushes a finger inside of me, his tongue mimics the actions, causing ripples of pleasure and relief to wash over my body.
I bring my hands to his face, and I fall in love with the scratchy feel of his five-o'clock shadow against my skin.
When I feel him position himself at my entrance, a nagging thought hovers in the back of my mind. I shove it away with brute force, not allowing my reality to rear its ugly head.
He pushes the head of his cock into me, and the uncomfortable feeling is welcoming. It forces me to focus on what we’re doing.
Jaxson breaks the kiss, and our eyes lock as he pushes another inch inside of me. He clenches his teeth as my body fights him, and my inner muscles try to push him out.
“Fuck, Doc. You’re tight.” He grinds the words out as if he’s losing control.
His eyes hold mine as he thrusts forward, breaking through
my virginity. A sharp pain rips through my abdomen, making tears burn behind my eyes as I gasp for air. When he pushes in deeper, I whimper as the sharp pain increases. The physical pain is all I can focus on as tears spill from my eyes.
He thrusts in all the way just as I think I can’t endure much more of it. His body stills over mine, and I’m grateful that he’s giving me time to adjust to his size.
Everything is quiet as we stare at each other.
There’s no grief.
There’s no hate.
There’s nothing but this indescribable moment between us.
From the moment we met, Jaxson has only given me dark scowls and low growl filled insults.
Until now.
Now his eyes are gentle and filled with affection. He presses tender kisses against my mouth, accompanied by soothing words.
“You’re extraordinary, Doc.”
When a tear escapes his eye and drops onto my cheekbone, I finally break down and weep as he starts to make love to me. Our tears mingle with our kisses, and I straddle the thin line between hate and falling hopelessly in love with him.
“In another life, I could love you,” I whisper.
