AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Chapter 16
On Monday, Aja felt like she’d been run over by a semi. Her period had come with a vengeance, making her body feel weighed down by pain. Her head hurt, her back ached, and her stomach cramped all the way to high hell. It was so horrible that she’d used some of her sick days to take off work. Around noon she realized that she needed to tell Walker that she couldn’t make it to bingo.
She hated that she wasn’t going to be able to see him. She also hated that it had only been a few days since they’d been together and already she was missing him. She’d wanted to text him on Sunday. Ask him what his plans for the day were, how Ms. May was, what he’d had for fucking breakfast. Her curiosity felt like it was eating her alive. She didn’t know what else she could do with it but lean in. In a compromise, she told herself that when she called, she wouldn’t ask him any personal questions. She’d tell him what she needed to, take a little time to soak in the sound of his voice, and hang up.
Walker answered on the second ring, his slow, deep drawl warming her instantly. “What’s goin’ on?”
“Nothing, just laying here,” she coughed. “Uhm… I have to pull out of bingo tonight. I’m not feeling too well.”
“What’s wrong?” He almost sounded pained as he hurried the words out. “Do you have a fever? Do you need anything?”
“No, no. I’m OK, I just…” She was a grown-up. It shouldn’t embarrass her to tell another grown-up that she was menstruating, and yet, there she was, stumbling over her words. “I have my period and my cramps are killing me.”
Walker breathed a sigh of relief. “You had me terrified there for a minute. You sounded so bad, I thought I was goin’ to have to run over there and take you to the ER. Do you need anything? I can stop at the store for you or bring you some food or somethin’.”
Aja opened her mouth to deny him but stopped herself. Later she’d blame her decision on her hormones—even if that level of bad decision-making was completely unprecedented for her, fluctuating hormones or not.
“No, I don’t need anything, but… you could come over if you wanted.” She threw her arm over her eyes, completely unable to focus on more than one of her senses as her heart thumped. “You know, just to hang out. Only if you’re comfortable with that…”
It never failed to shock her how easily she could flip-flop between the different parts of her personality with Walker. One moment, she was unsure and anxious, tripping over her words. The next, she was full of confidence, completely at ease and sure that he desired her, that she was desirable. Both feelings were intense, but she could never really predict which one was going to show when.
“I’m absolutely comfortable with that,” Walker rushed out. “I can be there in about twenty minutes. Are you sure you don’t need anything? I can stop and get a pizza on my way over.”
“No, I already have some turkey wraps prepped for lunch. You can have one too if you’re hungry.”
She could almost hear his smile. “Sounds good. I’ll see you in a bit.”
Walker ended up making it in fifteen. His knock was so strong against her door, it startled her out of the show she’d been watching. She fought the urge to fall into his arms the second she opened the door. He had on a pair of black track pants and a faded gray T-shirt that looked so soft she wanted to rub her face against it.
“Hey.” He looked down at her with soft eyes.
“Come on in.” She opened the door more for him and stepped aside.
She became keenly aware that this was the first time he’d been in her apartment. Actually, this was the first time anyone aside from the maintenance staff and her landlord had been in her apartment. She watched as his eyes took in the space, becoming hypercritical of herself for not doing any extra straightening up.
Greenbelt didn’t have a ton of free open real estate. When she’d made the decision to move, she’d snapped up the first thing available. The first thing had turned out to be a studio apartment with a little alcove in a four-story apartment building built in the ’60s. Honestly, she had very little to complain about. The pipes were old and noisy and the heat and hot water couldn’t run at the same time, but everything was sturdy and functional. Plus, it was nearly the same size as her tiny DC apartment for a third of the cost. She used the alcove as her office space and storage area, creating some work and life separation. She’d turned most of the main space into a living area, complete with a comfortable love seat and television. As for her bed—well, she’d taken the doors off the only closet and shoved the top of her queen-sized bed into the space, letting the rest jut into the room.
She liked her place. But she wasn’t in love with it. If she planned on staying in Greenbelt much longer, she’d need to find somewhere with a lot more space. But it worked for the time being.
Walker made a strangled noise in the back of his throat as he eyed her bed. Aja figured it was constrained lust rearing its head. But when he turned to look at her, she saw that it was something else entirely.
“Why do you have that in there?” He pointed to the bed.
“Uhm,” her mouth gaped. “In the closet you mean? Or like… on that side of the room?”
Was he about to insult her interior decorating skills? Was she about to be the first woman in the world to invite a man over only to have him storm out because he thought her furniture didn’t flow well together? Honestly, that would be just her fucking luck.
“Yes, in the closet.”
Her relief was audible. The question of why she kept her bed halfway in the closet was easier to answer than why she’d gone with a weird-looking green duvet cover.
“Oh, well, I like sleeping in there.” She shrugged. “I know it’s weird. With my anxiety you’d think I’d be claustrophobic, but I’ve always liked small spaces. Closets, bathtubs, the inside seats on planes, stuff like that. Being closed in makes me feel safe. Obviously I couldn’t get the entire bed in there, but even just being surrounded on both sides of my head helps me be less anxious at night.”
Walker stared at her. That look, the one she still couldn’t name, stuck on his face so long she feared he’d never be able to look at her any other way again.
“When I was a kid, whenever I was scared or I felt unsafe or anxious, I’d crawl into the back of my closet until I felt better again. It made me feel secure, defended, like nothin’ could hurt me because nothin’ could get to me.”
“That’s…” Aja had no idea how to articulate the way their admissions made her feel infinitely closer to him. There she was again, seeing him and being seen by him in ways that were completely new for her. With the loss of her words, something else in her chest moved perfectly into place.
