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I studied her as she considered and then shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. I’m being nosy.”
She sighed. “It’s…complicated.”
“Gee, I wouldn’t have guessed that,” I said.
She smiled, but her face quickly turned serious again.
“But I can tell you that there is nothing that any of them—any of us—wouldn’t do for you or Crystal,” she said.
“I know that,” I said. “I have to know that. I have my baby back, but…”
“I know. It’s an adjustment,” she said.
“Now who’s the queen of understatement?”
She smiled then went quiet, studying me.
“You love Davit,” she said.
“I do,” I said.
“That wasn’t a question. It was a statement. I know that you love him. You wouldn’t have made it this far if you didn’t.”
“Is that enough?” I asked.
“Only you can answer that question, Amy. But I will say this. It’s not just a matter of you loving him,” she said.
“What does that mean?”
“It means you may not see it, but you can deal with this. All of it. Do you know how many people would have run screaming by now or gone into witness protection?”
“Yes,” I said.
“And you haven’t. And even more than that, you seem happy.”
She went quiet then shifted and turned to look at me.
“I’m not going to pretend it’s not a lot. It’s a lot. And when their father comes back…” She trailed off, then let out a deep exhale.
“That’s a conversation for another day. But don’t ever for a moment doubt that you can do this. I think in a lot of ways, you were made for it. I don’t know you well enough to say for sure, but I don’t think you see how strong you really are.”
“Strong? I’m crying and trying to figure out if I need to buy a wipe warmer for myself. All of which clearly denotes strength, right?” I said.
She laughed. “Don’t worry about the warmer. I’ll make sure we both have one. But yeah—you, as best I could tell, found out the truth about Davit, which was something no one else managed to do. Hid from him for four months, which I can assure you is something no one else has been able to do. You protected your child. And you’re still here and still sane. That’s pretty freaking strong, Amy,” she said.
“Yeah, I guess I am kind of a badass,” I said with a laugh.
“There’s no ‘kind of’ in it. So I know this isn’t conventional, and I don’t give advice. But you can handle it,” she said.
“You sound sure,” I said.
“Because I am,” she responded without hesitation.
I didn’t answer immediately and instead shifted the now-cold wipe from one hand to the other.
Davit believed in me.
Kayla believed in me.
The question was, did I believe in me?
