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Thirty
Amethyst
“Crystal’s sleeping?”Davit asked when he entered the living room.
I nodded but didn’t say anything else.
He didn’t either.
I knew where he had been, could guess at what he had done, and I was waiting for the fallout.
I listened as he moved in the apartment, showering, stopping in Crystal’s room, no doubt to check in on her as I found myself doing so often, and then returning to the living room where I sat.
Other than tending to Crystal, I hadn’t really moved from this spot since he’d left, feeling a mix of both anxiety and calm that made it impossible for me to focus on anything else.
He stopped to stand in front of me, his chest bare, the shorts he was wearing showing off his muscular thighs.
I reacted as usual, the sight of him instantly pulling me in.
I followed that impulse, stood, and took two steps to stand in front of him.
He looked down at me, his eyes almost quizzical.
It was an expression I had seen little of from him, and I wasn’t sure that it was one that I liked. I didn’t want Davit to be confused, not when it came to me.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
In an instant, I understood.
That hesitation I had seen in his expression was clear in his voice, and I liked that even less.
“Are we okay?” he said.
I didn’t answer immediately, and as the seconds ticked by, I could see the tension building in him.
Saw the way he clenched his fists, something I suspected he wasn’t even aware he was doing.
Still, I couldn’t bring myself to speak.
Because as much as I wanted to think otherwise, as much as I maybe could have pretended, there was no way to do so now.
What he had done, what I was happy for him to do, was something that could never be undone. Not that I wanted to be, but before I could pretend, I could say I was unsure.
Could brush away how my ex, Keenan, had tried to kill, could pretend that Davit being responsible for his death didn’t matter.
Pretend that violence wasn’t a part of Davit’s life.
Ourlife.
I had no such recourse now.
But as I stared at him, I thought of so many other things.
The way he made me feel. Not just about him, but about myself.
How, in the short time I had known him, he had changed everything, had proven things to me about myself that I hadn’t believed possible.
How, despite knowing who he was, what he had done, and what he would do in the future, he made me happy.
