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Chapter Ten
Foreboding hung inDash’s carriage like the heavy fog that wafted in from the Thames, turning the night into a surreal dream. Dita couldn’t stop shivering. She swallowed and willed herself to gain control. Her body, like her mind, careened in and out of panic mode. Dash’s arm was around her, pressing her tight against his hot body, but it made no difference to the icy chill pervading her body and spirit.
Emmy sat stone silent, her lips pursed in disapproval of the impropriety of Dash’s jacket and arm draped around Dita. Dash and Emmy had the foresight to take Dita out the garden gate, saving her from providing a spectacle for tonight’s guests.
“Did Lord Beauvoir accept your fabrication? He doesn’t seem like a man easily hoodwinked by someone of your reputation.” Emmy rarely used her stern vicar’s daughter’s tone in Dita’s company, but she wielded it as well as Dita did her sticks and knives. And it currently was aimed directly at Dash.
“No sane man would question my word, Miss Rothsby.” Dash’s harsh voice lashed in the small space as did the wind that was picking up. The tension in his stiff posture and clenched jaw filled the airless carriage.
“Because you will meet them on the field of honor if they do, my lord?” Emmy asked sweetly, pushing her glasses up her nose.
Why was Emmy baiting the bear? Dita was too overwhelmed to join in the skirmish.
“Lord Beauvoir should have been the gentleman to escort Dita home. There will be speculation about your part in this drama.” Emmy gazed out the carriage.
“I made sure that everyone heard that my good friend Lord Clifton had entrusted me to escort his sister home after Lady Perdita had received distressing news about her dear cousin. It will be spread through the ballroom.”
“You are very skilled in dissembling, my lord.”
“Dearest, I care not about the talk. Roddy is in trouble.” Dita hated that her voice quivered. Hated that she wasn’t in command of herself and needing to lean into Dash’s heat and strength. She had been handling everything on her own, and practice over the years had made her very good at it. But tonight, she didn’t have the reserve or the will to fight. Maybe it was because she had spent the last days ignoring the rising fear that something was amiss, hoping that her instincts were wrong.
A great weight had been lifted by Dash’s exit of Haversham’s this morning when she believed that Roddy, too, was at the club. If she hadn’t run to avoid public discovery, she would have not wasted the day on frivolities instead of continuing the search. She had to believe that she would know in her heart if Roddy was dead. If she didn’t have that hope…
“What if Lord Beldon’s conjecture that Roddy has a new mistress is correct, and all this worry is for naught? I must consider all possibilities if I’m to protect you and your reputation.”
Dita stared into her dearest friend’s eyes, seeing her own worry and fear reflected back at her. Emmy too cared about Roddy and was upset. Emmy reverted to the vicar’s daughter, not knowing how else to be of help.
Dita had to pull herself together for both their sakes and for Roddy. But panic had settled into her being and couldn’t be shaken readily. Roddy had been her savior in her childhood, as was the man whose muscular thigh was pressed against hers. Both men had been her knights in shining armor, breaking the monotony of a succession of governesses. And tonight, like in the past, Dash’s presence helped Dita not to feel alone.
“Emmy, I wish it were true, but my feelings…” She shook her head, struggling for words to express the twisting in her stomach and the bone deep knowledge that Roddy didn’t have a mistress. She wasn’t a woman given to flights of fancy. She hadn’t a childhood spent in girlish daydreams and fanciful play, but rather, hours spent with Alfie in the stable or in the field practicing her skills with the stable boys.
“I’d celebrate any woman that has kept my brother from home. Either he was set upon by footpads when he went to Haversham’s or his work for the government has endangered him.” A vision of Roddy lying injured in an alley sent a shiver cascading through her.
Dash patted her hand as if he knew her disturbing thoughts. “There is a chance that Roddy might have been called away for a secret government meeting.”
Dita appreciated Dash’s attempt at comforting her, but he hadn’t been able to hide his shock and alarm when he learned of the note. He quickly regained control of himself though repressed restlessness radiated off him. His chin thrust and taut neck conveyed all he didn’t express.
“I must search his desk once we arrive at Clifton house for any communication he might have had with Hawkesbury or Sidmouth. Have you spoken to his man of business? He might know of a planned meeting that you weren’t privy to.” Dash rattling off his thoughts was another sign of his shock.
“Yes, I’ve spoken with Mr. Potts, his secretary, and he knows nothing that would take Roddy away. And he hasn’t spoken to him since Roddy received the note. But if it were government business, Mr. Potts might not be informed.” Having to focus on what actions she had taken and still needed to be done kept dread from engulfing her.
“I’ve already searched his office. There is nothing which gives any hint of what he was working on. Of course, a set of fresh eyes will help, but I believe his office in Westminster may hold a key to this business. His secretary wouldn’t allow me access to his office without Roddy present—after he recovered from his shock at my appearance at the male bastion. But I’m sure you’ll be able to get past his secretary.” Dita relived the embarrassment and powerlessness she felt under Roddy’s secretary’s scrutiny when she requested to remain in Roddy’s office until he returned. She wanted to search the office and hadn’t wanted to alert anyone that Roddy might have returned to gambling and womanizing with his dissolute friend.
“You went to Westminster? And wherever else have you gone risking yourself?”
She resented his tone that she was somehow at fault.
“It is not unseemly to visit her brother at his work. I accompanied her.” Emmy was like a ferocious watch dog, ready to attack for her mistress.
“Did you find it unseemly for Lady Perdita to be at Haversham’s this morning disguised as a servant?”
“My goodness. Was it only this morning?” Dita waded between the opponents. “I also sent messages to White’s and Gleason’s Boxing Club knowing I would never gain admittance. Roddy didn’t respond to either note.” Roddy had also been educated in the arts of self-defense by Alfie. Of course, Alfie refused to tutor her seriously in boxing. Only women of lower classes were allowed to strike each other in the face. Not that Dita had any desire to hit anyone but right now… there was always tomorrow.
*
Upon arrival athome, Dash blasted out of the carriage, lent a hand to Dita, and then to Emmy. His need for action resonated with Dita. She too wanted to do something and not just be a shivering mess.
“Lady Perdita?” Reese stood with the door open. The butler, like Totty, had been with the family since she was a little girl. His mouth was agape at Dash’s jacket around her shoulders. “Is anything amiss, my lady? Should I summon the physician?”
