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“Not everyone has connections.”
“That’s true, but that doesn’t mean they make it on their own. I didn’t have a connection, but I had my mother. She saw my potential, and she helped me achieve it. If she hadn’t supported me by paying for music lessons and driving me to venues, I wouldn’t be where I am today.”
I’d never heard her talk about my grandmother that way, and it touched me. I’d always wondered how my sweet grandmother had raised such a coldhearted woman, but perhaps I was just as guilty of misunderstanding my mother as she was of me. “How come you’ve never talked to me about any of this?” I asked.
“I don’t like talking about it because frankly, it’s uncomfortable.”
For the first time, I realized my mother was emotionally stilted. For as much of a head case as I could be, she had her own issues, just on the opposite end of the spectrum. “I’m glad we had this talk,” I told her. Part of me was tempted to go around the table to hug her, but I nixed that idea. She’d never been a hugger and only did so on such obligatory occasions as when I graduated college.
“Right.” The relief on her face was obvious, and it made me smile. “If we’re done, can we invite Stan and Emily back into the room now?”
My mother and I would never see eye to eye, but I was beginning to understand why, at least, and that made a difference.
I nodded and called for my sister.
Georgia and Walter made it to the final episode ofSing Battle. There were three contestants left, and one would be declared the winner. I put on my big-girl panties, pulled them up high enough to touch my nipples, and booked a flight to LA. Georgia had made it that far without me, proving she didn’t need me, but I still wanted to support my friend.
My emotions rolled right along with my stomach as the plane touched down at LAX. The last time I’d made that trip, I’d had stars in my eyes and hope in my heart. This time, the stars were gone, replaced by a clarity I hadn’t had before. The hope was there, though, but I was hoping for much different things. I had three hopes in particular, but I tried not to think about any of them too much, lest I jinx myself.
Unfortunately, the hotel where Georgia and I had stayed was fully booked, so I had to stay down the block. I had wanted to see her before she had to report for the final reveal show, but my flight had gotten delayed. As soon as I dropped off my luggage, I spruced up my face, changed my clothes, and ordered an Uber. It was a serious case of déjà vu, only I didn’t have knots in my stomach. My future wasn’t on the line—I was merely there to support my friend.
No one’s entire future was on the line. DidSing Battleoffer an amazing opportunity? Hell yes. But it wasn’t the only opportunity, and to treat it that way was shortsighted.
I’d been myopic in too many ways to count. I was trying not to beat myself up over it, but it was difficult, especially considering that I didn’t know yet if I could redeem myself.
Walking into the auditorium as a spectator instead of a performer was odd. As I took my seat, I waited to be filled with bitterness and resentment, but to my relief, that didn’t happen. I was still a work in progress, so I hadn’t been sure how I would feel.
I wished I could have made it to the performance in addition to the results show, but I’d promised Emily I’d take her to a rock concert that had been that night, much to my mother’s chagrin. I was enjoying being a bad influence on my little sister.
Evan took the stage to introduce each pair, and a montage of their entire season showed on the massive screen. I wondered what clips they would have chosen for my montage with Trenton if we’d made it that far. The thought made me a little sad but mostly happy because we’d made a lot of good memories.
I could only hope they wouldn’t be the last.
Evan held a large shiny envelope. Finally, it was time to learn who had wonSing Battleand the recording contract with Wind Shine Records, and he seemed to enjoy drawing out the suspense. “This season has been a roller coaster. I’m a little sad to see it end, which it will as soon as I open this envelope. So perhaps I’ll hold off a few more moments so we can enjoy—” He stopped at the sound of the audience booing and chuckled. “Okay, okay, I’m just teasing. The first ever duet pair to winSing Battleis… Carlita and Linus!”
My heart sank as the first of my hopes went up in smoke. I watched Georgia for signs that she was devastated, but the smile stayed on her face, and she cheered for the winners, even putting her fingers in her mouth to whistle in an obnoxious way incongruous with her Southern belle appearance. She whispered in Walter’s ear, and he laughed. I was glad to see that he, too, was smiling. That was something, at least.
After the show, the audience filtered out the back doors, but I headed toward the stage. I showed my pass to the security guard, but that wasn’t necessary because he recognized me. “What happened to you was a damn shame,” he said. “You could have been on that stage just now.” Iwouldhave been on that stage along with Georgia and Linus—I knew it in my soul—but somehow, I wasn’t bitter anymore.
“Thanks, Brian,” I said, quickly reading his name tag, “but everything works out the way it’s supposed to.”God, please let that be true.
I found Georgia outside our old dressing room with Walter and Brandon. She squealed when she saw me and wrapped her arms around me in a bear hug. “I’m so happy you’re here!”
I laughed. “I’m sorry I didn’t make it sooner.”
“No worries, girl. I’m just glad you made it at all. Stupid flight delays.”
“You’re telling me.” I was exhausted. While it was only ten here, because of the time change, I felt like it was one in the morning.
She grinned. “Want to help me out of my dress for old time’s sake?”
“Of course.” Once in the dressing room, I gripped her arms and really looked at her. “Are you okay or are you putting on a brave face?”
She kept her gaze locked on mine. “I am one hundred percent okay. Any of us would have deserved to win.”
I believed her. Nodding, I released her. “Okay. Now turn around so I can unzip you.”
She complied. “This dress is fantastic, isn’t it? I begged the costume department to find something similar to yourPhantomdress, and they delivered.”
