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Chapter 16
As Louisa sat in the carriage on the drive home from Isaac’s house, she could not seem to stop her hands from shaking. No matter what she did, she could not stop re-playing the few moments before the kiss as well as the kiss itself. It simultaneously felt like a dream and a nightmare; it was both better than she could have ever imagined, and the worst thing that could have possibly happened.
She made herself look out the window, attempting to become distracted. It had started to rain just as she was fleeing from the Quince estate, and now the rain was coming down in buckets. Unlike most people, Louisa actually found rain to be quite calming. She zeroed in on the rain droplets running down the carriage windows and tried to focus only on that.
When she was able to do that for about thirty seconds, she finally found that her breathing had begun to return to normal, and her whole body had stopped vibrating from the excitement of the kiss.
Though, of course, when she gave her mind a moment’s break from looking at the rain, the guilty thoughts flooded back in.You fool! she cursed herself.Now you know for certain the way that Isaac feels for you, and he believes that you have confirmed your feelings for him. This will only make your betrayal of him ten times worse, and he may never recover from something like this.
Louisa was suddenly jarred from her thoughts when the carriage came to an abrupt stop. Louisa looked around to see where they were and recognized none of the landscape. She was just about to lean out the door and ask the driver what had happened when the door to her right swung open, and Stephen Strandmere let himself into the carriage.
“Hello, my dear,” he greeted her gleefully. “What an unexpected pleasure to have stumbled into you on this road leading from Isaac Quince’s home to yours. Driver? Continue!”
Stephen banged on the front of the carriage twice, and the driver continued at his previous pace. Louisa shrunk as far as she could away from Stephen with a grimace upon her face.
“Mr. Strandmere. What is it that you want?” she asked frankly, affording him none of the social pleasantries that she had been forced to in front of her parents. Stephen had dropped by unannounced a few times this week, and Louisa had been obligated to introduce him to them. Naturally, she did not inform them of the plan that they had been forming, but it still made her uncomfortable to know that her parents were now becoming acquainted with this vile man. His visits would also make their engagement seem less surprising to Louisa’s parents, for better or for worse.
“Can I not simply surprise my fiancée-to-be on her way home?” Stephen asked innocently, unsuccessfully trying to brush some of the water from his jacket. “Why do we need to discuss our little scheme at all of our meetings?”
“Because otherwise, we have no reason to be acquainted,” Louisa said coldly. “If you have something to say to me, do it now, and do it quickly, for we are rapidly approaching my home, and I do not wish my parents to see you travelling with me.”
Stephen raised his eyebrows and leaned back onto the seat, crossing his hands and placing them on his stomach. “Well, well, look at you, Missdemanding,” Stephen said condescendingly. “Isn’t that adorable; you think that you have any choice in the way that I treat you. I shall not adhere to your wish of being unseen by your parents, but I shall get right to my point of dropping in on you like this. What price have you driven your home up to now?”
Louisa felt the panic that she had just managed to control, beginning to bubble beneath the surface once more. “Almost ... double what it was before,” she lied, not meeting Stephen’s eye.
Unfortunately, Stephen could see right through her. “That is a flagrant lie, and I will not have that!” Stephen slammed his hand so hard against the seat that a cloud of dust filled the air in front of Louisa and made her cough. “If you do not adhere to our plan and my wishes, then I shall call everything off. You will not only be left penniless and disgraced but the Quinces, the only family held in high regard in town who currently wants anything to do with you, shall abandon you as well for leading their son on a fool’s errand. Is that what you want?”
Louisa, having recovered from her coughing fit, stared determinedly out the window and did not say a word to Stephen. She could feel his eyes boring into her, but she did not care; he was behaving like a petulant child, and she was not going to be a part of it. Finally, when she thought she had given him enough silence, she gave him an answer.
“Mr Strandmere. I understand that you think that you control every aspect of this situation, but you sadly cannot. I am the middle man in this situation, and I am suffering dearly for it. You continuously ask me to draw out the process of selling my family’s home to ask for more money, and yet you have not once thought about the fact that my father has not worked for some time, and so we are in rather desperate need of assistance. I cannot draw this out any longer, and I cannot ask for more money; we need the money from the sale of this housenow.”
Louisa finally looked back at Stephen and expected him to be still fuming after his explosion. However, he now simply looked upon Louisa with pity. “Oh, you poor thing,” he said patronizingly. “You’re that desperate for money? Why did you not ask me, your soon to be dearly beloved. I shall take care of you.”
Louisa felt as though she might be sick. “No,” she said firmly, standing her ground. “My family’s name has already been dragged through the mud for making foolish errors. I shall not take money from you until we are married. I will not do anything more to risk my reputation.”
Stephen laughed cruelly. “Miss Louisa, I shall say this one last time and make myself perfectly clear: you will do as you are told. I am sickened by your lack of gratitude for my generosity, and you are almost making me regret my decision to offer to marry you. But in the end, I know that it will be worth it. And I can always supplement you with a mistress or two.”
That was all that Louisa could take. She banged twice upon the front of the carriage, and it ground to a halt. She jumped from the wagon, looked around, and saw to her great relief that she was close to their home. She could hear Stephen shouting something from behind her but did not reply. She turned to the driver on her way past and said, “Please deliver Mr Strandmere to his home and then return the carriage, thank you.”
The driver nodded and turned the horses around. She could now only hear the muffled tones of Stephen, as the door had been closed on him when the horses turned. All that mattered now was that her feet were pounding against the road, the rain was in her face, and she was within sight of home. She did her best to erase what Stephen had said from her memory and decided that no matter what Stephen said, she would meet Isaac tomorrow to finalize the sale. She would deal with the consequences of that when the time came.
She decided against writing to Isaac to warn him that she was coming, enjoying the idea of surprising him. Louisa still felt a massive amount of guilt for having kissed him when she knew what she had to do to him, but she also needed to have a few small delights to keep her going, and so the thought of surprising Isaac remained.
She spent the rest of that evening caring for her father while her mother struggled through making dinner, and Sophie had the night off. Louisa could not have been more grateful to have Sophie around, especially now, and she hoped that even though the family could not be more generous to her financially, she felt appreciated through their verbal gratitude. Louisa was also thankful that Sophie had pressed no further about what had been on her mind the night that she had caught on to her ill mood. Sophie was wonderful like that.
She decided to set out for Isaac’s home early the next morning while her family was still in bed. She did not want them to enquire about where she was going, as she had been trying to keep her visits to Isaac’s home a secret. She knew that if her father were to become aware of any sort of continuation regarding negotiating the house price, he wouldn’t be able to rest.
He was already being stubborn enough now about remaining in bed while Louisa took care of the household affairs. Doctor Abbott had been by to visit a few times (and of course, the Quince brothers had kindly already taken care of his fee) and was really helping Archie to recover, but Archie was anxious for his recovery to move even faster. Louisa hoped that she could keep his concerns about the house at bay for long enough that she could handle it.
Louisa took the family’s horse and rode to Isaac’s estate. It was so early in the morning that there was still mist coming off of the fields as she rode past. The sunlight was just beginning to sparkle through the trees, and the dew that had collected on the foliage was now encouraging the light to twinkle. For once, Louisa allowed herself a pleasurable ride where she did not once fret over what would happen when she arrived at Isaac’s estate.
She took her horse inside the barn when she got there, and then entered the house through the servants’ entrance. She felt very scandalous entering the house without knocking or being welcomed, but she so hoped to catch Isaac off-guard and surprise him to see what his genuine reaction would be to her.
Louisa knew she could always make up some excuse as to how she had entered the house; her main concern was seeing how Isaac truly felt about her when he saw her unannounced.
She walked through the main hall, past the dining room and the first sitting room, and then was about to go down the long hall towards the garden when she passed the library. There was a figure sitting in a chair with his back to the door, and from the blond tuft of hair she could see poking out above the top of the chair, she knew it was Isaac. She took in a deep breath and gently knocked on the door.
