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BEAU
The next morning, I woke up lying on my bed amongst the crumpled clothes. I couldn’t be bothered to tidy up the night before, too exhausted to do anything. Exhausted and heartbroken that I’d not only lost the locket and wedding rings left to me, but knowingdeep down that the only person who could have taken them was Megan.
I should have noticed she’d got worse over the past few weeks, staying out at night and when she did come home, she was tired and glassy-eyed. I should have realised Kevin was around more often. Realised I was slowly losing her to the drugs and was powerless to stop it.
I walked to the kitchen area, sifting through the debris on the floor for an intact mug or a cup, something I could at least make a cup of coffee in. Finding nothing, I sat on the floor, surrounded by what felt like the remnants of my life. This was literally all I had to show for my hard work: broken, mismatched plates and chipped cups. It was pitiful, really, when I thought about how long I’d worked. Every penny went to this flat. I helped Megan as much as I could with food and clothing. If I gave her money, it would only end up in her arm or up her nose. In reality, she was sucking me dry, draining me of energy and money until I had nothing left to give.
The longer I sat there, though, the more I realised that wallowing in self-pity wouldn’t help. It was time to get back on my feet and fight for what I wanted, fight for what I knew I deserved, but a part of me was tired of fighting, tired of being this person. I needed to start helping myself. I’d spent so much time looking after Megan I’d forgotten about me.
A hammering on the door and a shout from Megan to let her in had me standing, pulling my shoulders back and striding over to the door, opening it just as far as the chain would allow.
“Come on, Beau. Let me in. It’s fucking cold out here.” She looked cold, her nose red, eyes puffy.
“What do you want, Megan?”
“I want to come in, get some coffee and go to bed.” She laughed, a little too nervously.
I shook my head. “You’ll be lucky.” I took the chain off the door and flung it open, revealing the mess inside. “If you can find an unbroken cup, you’re welcome to it. I’ve been looking for the last ten minutes, and there’s not one to be found.”
I watched her closely as she stepped into the flat, looking for any sign that she might know what had happened, but her expression gave nothing away. A slight frown maybe, but that was it.
“Who did it, Megan? We had nothing worth taking, nothing to sell.”
“I, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” And there it was, that flicker of doubt in her eyes, the stammer in her voice. She knew exactly what had happened.
“Who did you give the key to, or who did you let in? Because I’m telling you now, Megan, I’m fucking raging, I’m bouncing, and if I find out who did this—” I couldn’t finish my sentence. I was so angry with her. My temper and voice rose with each word.
“I lost my key. That’s why I asked you to let me in.”
“Lost it or gave it to someone? Because whoever had the key took or broke everything we owned.” By now I was shouting. “We have nothing. I don’t get paid for another week, so how are we going to eat? Eh, Megan? What are we going to eat off? Drink out of? There’s nothing left.”
I turned away from her, but not before I saw the tears in her eyes, the scars around her eye blanching as she cried.
“Honestly, Beau, I lost my key a few nights ago. That night when you found Kevin here. Maybe he took it.”
I was surprised she remembered anything from that night, but I supposed he could have taken it from her. What got to me, though, was the fact they knew where to look for the jewellery. I thought I’d hidden so well, but she must have seen me hide it away.
God, I was stupid sometimes. You’d think I’d have learnt my lesson with the amount of times I’d found her searching for stuff to sell to fund her habit.
But I had to deal with this, deal with her. I took a deep breath, bringing my temper under control. Should I give her the benefit of the doubt? Did I believe her?
I turned back to look at her and watched as she, too, sifted through the debris on the floor with her foot.
“There’s nothing left. Why did they do this?” I heard her mutter under her breath.
“Who, Megan? Who? I know you know something.” I grabbed her hand, forcing her to look at me.
“I don’t fucking know. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.”She began to sob, collapsing into my arms. “They said they just wanted something to sell.”
“And you told them where the jewellery was.” I spoke quietly now. I didn’t think shouting was going to get us anywhere.
She nodded against my chest.
“You know we have nothing left of them now, don’t you? Those were the last things we had of Mum and Dad.” My anger started to grow again.
I struggled to hear her response but heard a soft, “I know.”
I knew deep down it was the truth but to hear her admit it, here and now... I pushed her away from me.
