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“Get the fuck out, Megan.”
“What? I haven’t got anywhere to go.” She looked at me with pleading in her eyes, and just seeing those scars, I almost caved, but I couldn’t keep giving her what she wanted. At some point, she needed to stand on her own two feet. I’d let her take advantage of me for the last time.
“Why don’t you go find Kevin? Pretty sure he’d have somewhere for you to stay. But I’ve had enough.”
“You can’t do this, Beau. You can’t just kick me out.” The pleading in her eyes was replaced with cold, hard anger. “This is all your fucking fault. It’s your fault I look like this.” She gestured to the scars on her face and her leg. “If you hadn’t been so stupid that night, the accident wouldn’t have happened.”
“Shut up now, Megan, before you say something you can’t take back.” The anger was back, and I knew this was a pivotal point in our relationship. “Don’t you think I don’t know that? How long have I tried to make amends, to help you get off the drugs? And every time you’re straight back on them. We go round and round in circles. This has to stop, Megan.”
“You have no idea what I’ve gone through. The pain, the strange looks. Is it any wonder I’m the way that I am? And it’s all because of you.”
I did know, though. I’d been with her every step of the way, every day for the past however many years. I’d laughed and cried with her, but more and more, she’d pulled away, and now I wasn’t sure who she was anymore.
“I can’t keep doing this, Megan. It’s killing me inside. Watching you do this to yourself. I’m done, and I really think maybe you should go.” This was the hardest thing I’d ever had to do, but I couldn’t keep doing this with her.
“You know what, Beau? Fuck you. Fuck you and the self-righteous shit you spout every fucking day. Whiter than white Beau. Beau who’s selling himself to his boss because he’s too pathetic and weak to say no.”
Her words spurred me into action, and grabbing the sleeve of her coat, I marched her towards the door, pushing her through it.
“When you’re clean, you can come back, but until then, we’re finished.”
I slammed the door in her face, almost laughing at the look of shock on her face; it was comical, but now, I felt drained. I needed to get to the money I knew she’d never find, but to do that, I needed to leave the house. I wanted to change the locks so there’d be no chance of them getting back in.
It was only 11 a.m., and after the morning I’d had, I was going out tonight. I was going to Level, and I was going to see Kwan.
I didn’t want to go on my own, though, so I called the one person I knew would come to a club with me, and that was Ziggy.
Grabbing my phone from the bedroom, I dialled his number, waiting for him to answer.
“Hey, Beau.” I heard the rustling of sheets in the background and realised I might have interrupted something. He and Marc had become inseparable since his accident, and he’d recently moved in with him. I couldn’t have been more pleased with the outcome. It’d been touch and go for a while with him, but he’d pulled through with Marc’s love and support.
“Hi. I just wondered if you had any plans for tonight. I’ve been invited to a club in Liverpool, but I don’t want to go on my own.”
“You’re a big boy now, Beau. Do you need me to hold your hand, though?” I heard the laughter in his voice, and I knew he was teasing. Ziggy would do anything for a friend, and we’d become close friends after his ‘accident’, as he liked to call it.
“Yeah, I know, but I don’t know the club and—” I paused, not knowing how much to tell him. “I want to go and see a guy, but if it doesn’t work out, I don’t want to look like a dick.”
“I’m always up for a night out. Marc’s working anyway, so it saves me being home alone. Just don’t let me drink shots. I can’t control my mouth when I drink those.”
I’d had first-hand experience of Ziggy and shots, and with how Marc had threatened me last time we went out, I wasn’t going to let that happen again.
We made arrangements to meet outside Level at nine and ended the call with a promise to Marc that we’d behave. Before I could chicken out, I found the piece of paper with Kwan’s number on it and texted him to let him know I’d be there and to look out for me.
I spent the rest of the day cleaning the flat and managed to find one intact cup, so I made myself a coffee with a jar I found tucked at the back of a cupboard. I’d got to my stash of cash and replaced the locks on the doors. No one would be getting in tonight while I was out.
At seven thirty, I started to get ready, going through the few clothes I had, when there was a knock on the door. Wary of who might be on the other side, I slowly opened it, leaving the chain on.
“It’s only me,” Ziggy said from the other side.
“Fuck, Ziggy. You’ll give me a heart attack,” I said as I removed the chain. He entered, a clothes bag slung over his shoulder.
“I knew you’d be panicking about what to wear, so I brought some stuff over. Some of it might be too big, but I reckon we can find something for you.”
He knew me well, knew that I didn’t have a whole lot, just my uniform for the bar and a few pairs of jeans and T-shirts.
I sifted through the clothes and before long, had on a tight-fitting black button-up shirt and a pair of dark-blue jeans. He styled my hair, applying some gel, and stepped back to admire his handiwork.
“That’ll do. Whoever this guy is you’re trying to impress, he’ll be knocked on his arse when he sees you. Now, you can tell me all about him on the way.”
