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Though there is a line of us, he bypasses the other three immediately, coming straight for me. I feel a warm, sturdy presence against my back that makes me feel even more out of sorts. I dimly note that somebody next to me has fallen to their knees, begging in supplication, and another one whimpers, but I am frozen, entirely unable to do anything but feel.
He embraces me, running sharp nails lightly against my side as he breathes against my neck. Instinctively, I cant my head slightly to the left, giving him better access. I don’t know why I want him to have an easier time getting to me, I only know that I need it. His warm, rough hands skim to the front of me, fondling my breasts and cupping them, testing their weight. He lets out a breathy groan as I tremble, needing something I have no word or explanation for.
Something sharp grazes my neck and then immediately, he disappears, almost as if he were on a rope and suddenly pulled away. I hear him growl and a shudder works its way methodically down my spine, flooding every part of my nervous system. I don’t know why I feel mournful as my back goes cold, missing his presence, or why his keening cries make me want to run to him, but I do. My heart feels pain and my body restless, that I’ve been left here when he has gone elsewhere.
The candidate that had fallen to her knees and was begging now openly weeps as we hear inhuman sounds and what I can only call a growl, this godly manifestation enraged at being controlled. There is a different feel to the room as the sounds cut off abruptly, leaving me bereft of anything from him, save a faint trace of cinnamon that seems to linger on my body where he touched me. A scent that is triggering something in my brain.
My body expels more blood, and it itches as it traces its way down my thigh, but I dare not move even the smallest of my fingers.
Great Mother comes and removes everyone’s blindfold, and I am struck anew when she backs up and offers a bow to me. The rest of the sisters in the room immediately do so as well, forming a circle around me and offering their respect for being chosen. It feels surreal to have the roles between Great Mother and I so blatantly switched, when it is normally I that does the bowing while she deems me worthy or not of a conversation.
“Ernyu has chosen swiftly today, sisters. He shows us great favor, selecting Cala for his bride.
“To offer you distinction, I award you now with your fifth letter. Let it be known that Cala, becomes Calai. We celebrate you, chosen vessel.”
My sisters step forward and kiss my hand one by one, and then they file out at Great Mother’s signal. When the room is once more empty, Great Mother leads me out behind them, linking our arms together like we’re equals. It doesn’t feel real being awarded such an honor, but I am now trembling in anticipation, readying for what happens next.
Great Mother leads me through the compound on the heels of the sisters that were not chosen, and as we pass, others quit their tasks to join us in our procession to the gathering space.
Once there, Great Mother lifts our now-joined hands for all to see. Though there are hundreds within this echoing room now, not one dares to speak. I feel as though I can barely breathe, still in withdrawal from the personage taken from me earlier, my body longing for something I don’t understand; yet I am on display for everyone, made to stand like a performer while everyone looks their fill.
I have signed away the rights to my body by participating in the choosing, and so my clothes have not been returned to me like they were for the others that now stand amongst the throng here to witness this. I should maybe feel a little embarrassed or self-conscious, but instead, I feelpowerful.
Blood still slowly drips down my thighs, but when Eln makes eye contact with me from across the room, my aches and cramps turn into something heavier. Something needier. I can feel the attention Dara is also bestowing her, her fists curling as she realizes she won’t ever get her now. I’m ready to shout my claim, to pull her under my protection so she won’t suffer such glances again. It makes me feel very…possessive, to see others look at my Eln the way Dara is.
When everyone has looked their fill of me, Great Mother finally begins her announcement. “Cala, now Calai, makes us all proud. He Who Watches has chosen her, emphatically, to be his bride. This will be a time of change for all who live here, as we prepare to create another nameless to induct into our clan. Calai has a long road ahead of her and needs every one of us supporting her and ensuring that the babe she will grow flourishes.
“To aid you and comfort you, Calai, you will be granted a boon. One companion of your choosing, to be your shadow. She will be expected to care for you and anticipate your every need, to keep you calm and ensure you remain in a good headspace until the babe comes. Once named, it will not be undone. Who do you call for?”
I take a big breath, letting the air fill my lungs completely as my head tilts a little higher, pride suffusing throughout me. I’ve waited so long to be able to offer this to Eln, the one who deserves so much more than she’s been given so far. Our private moments won’t need to be hidden anymore, and she will be safe from the Great Mother’s harsher punishments. Once named, she isn’t to be touched physically, because she will become an extension of myself.
“I choose Eln, Great Mother.”
She nods, likely expecting this answer. “Eln, please step forward to accept or deny Calai’s request.”
The space between us is too much as Eln makes her way through the parting crowd, every step made carefully as she draws ever nearer. Our eyes stay on one another even as she comes to stand before me, barely sparing Great Mother a curtsy before she is once again fixated on me as I am with her.
“Do you understand the severity of this arrangement, Eln? If you accept, you and Calai become one unit. What she needs, you will provide. You will be intimate and supportive, emotionally, and physically. You will be by her side during the procedure and for the entire length of gestation. When the nameless comes, it will be your job to guide her through her labor and ensure she remains as comfortable as possible. Do you accept?”
“I accept with honor, Great Mother.” Eln kneels before me, eyes still locked with mine, but her breathing is getting heavier and heavier.
“Just so. Let it be known that Eln is not to be touched by any of you. Anything she requests from kitchen or laundry is to be handed over without question. She is the sole caregiver here on out for our chosen vessel and will be treated with the utmost respect or you will receive punishment. Anyone that seeks her out for harm or is found with intent to harm, in regard to either of these sisters, will be thrown into the canyon.
“Eln, do you vow to guide Calai and nurture her, to stay by her side while she carries the young, to pamper her body and treat her as a goddess?”
“Yes, Great Mother. I do.”
“Prove your devotion, so all may see your vow. Sisters, watch our vessel find her pleasure so you may all receive the blessing of her fertility.”
I block out everyone else that exists in this room, my vision seeing only Eln as she rises to her feet, so our faces are on the same level. She takes a purposeful step forward until our bodies lightly brush against each other, closing her eyes just as mine flutter closed. Our lips meet and it’s thrilling to be doing this so openly.
She kisses me hungrier than she ever has, taking control of it. Normally it’s me that leads our kissing and couplings, but I find I enjoy letting her do as she pleases with me. She’s got to still be sore from yesterday’s punishments, but I also know she won’t let anything stop her from doing what she sees as her right and duty.
As her mouth parts, her hand traces along my side, over my breast and around my nipple before cupping me. My breasts are far too large for her hands, but that doesn’t slow her down. Her other hand winds around me to pull my hips flush with hers, and my breathing quickens, my body still hyper-alert from the ritual and the being that grazed me. I find my neck aching, needing pressure there somehow.
Eln breaks from kissing me to nip at my neck, making me gasp when I realize how sensitive I am right now. Reading my signals, she lingers for a moment, kissing and sucking at my skin before dipping her head to taste my nipples. They’re firm and tight, proudly erect, begging for attention. Her mouth feels too small, but I enjoy it still. Her tongue is hot and wet, tracing me like she knows I enjoy, both hands aiding her to massage my breasts.
While one hand falls lower on my body, dipping into the place I bleed, I moan encouragement as my head falls back. Eln’s thumb finds the one place that feels better than the rest, pressing against it and releasing the pressure, over and over again before she slips two fingers as deep inside of me as she can get.
