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“Stop calling me that, Marsh. Take your daddy kink elsewhere and go away.”
“Why do you have to be such a bitch?” He seethed through clenched teeth. I could see smudges and fingerprints on his sunglasses. “I love you. No one will ever love you like I love you.” He stepped closer, his body getting closer to mine. “Just let me love you, like I always did.”
“No, Marsh.” I turned back my back to him, nervous to unlock the door with him breathing down my neck. Marsh was so close a nervous sweat break out across my skin. I set my pack next to the entrance, reaching into my pocket to find my keys.
“Fuck Lana, it was mostly just the one time. It’s not that big of a deal!”
“Marsh, I’m tired and just want to rest. Please go.” I felt the keys in my grip, sliding two of them between my knuckles. They were sharp and filled me with a new sense of calm, Hayden’s words coming back to me. With a shaky breath, my voice seethed between my lips. I said the words clearly and laced with venom, “I want you to leave.”
Marsh huffed, his agitation clear and the look in his eyes was pure hatred. I knew that look. He was going to be mean. “What happened to that hike of yours, anyway? You couldn’t finish it, could you?” He spat at the ground near my feet. A hint of dark tobacco scum. “You can’t do shit without me. Elaine, you’re such a waste. You need me, so stop being such a stuck-up bitch.”
My patience broke, and I could feel a war brewing in my chest. He’s right. My mind reeled. He’s always right. Then Hayden’s words resounded deep inside me, like a distant rumble of warm thunder.
You are strong, Lana. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Fuck Marsh. I am strong. I am brave. Defiance “What did she call you that night?” A cold settled on my skin in the scorching sun. “What did she call you, the pretty lady server? Tell me again, Marsh. Refresh my memory.”
“What the fuck do you think you’re playing at?”
“Butterbuns, was that it?” I turned again to see Marsh flushed, his face bright red, a scowl written in bold his face. He opened his mouth to rage at me but I held up my iPhone, recording since I had left the car. “Better not say it, Marsh. Leaving is your best decision.”
He stood still, shoulders tight and teeth digging at the inside of his lip. Marsh clenched a fist and raised it. I clenched my own, ready for his blow. But I would not go down without a fight. I would not let this man belittle me again.
“Hey Lana!” A deep voice called from the driveway. “Good to see you back safe!” Bounding up the driveway was a very welcome face.
William had a good-natured smile and muscles for days, making each of his steps seem as if he was walking on air. He skipped up to the front door and slapped his hands to his cheeks with an exaggerated gasp. “Well, look who it is! If it isn’t Marshall Langley, Captain Butterbuns of our local degenerates! How have you been, buddy? Still humping the dive bar lady?”
Marsh glared knives and squared his broad shoulders. No matter his stance, he was outranked by the ex-mma fighter turned martial arts instructor. His enraged demeanor cooling to an embarrassed sizzle under the eyes of the hulking man. “Both of you can go fuck yourselves.” He pushed past the beast of the man and hurried into his truck. Leaning out the front window, he called to me with fury laced in his voice, “It’s not fucking over Lana! Your fag won’t be around all the time!” Marsh pulled out of the driveway with a squeal. We both listened until the sound of the truck was in the distance.
Will spoke first as he stared after the truck screeching down the street. “What an outdated insult. Well, he’s not invited to our pride party, that’s for sure.” Looking back at me, Will’s eyes filled with sudden concern. He set a hand on my shoulder, warm and comforting. “You okay? He arrived and sat outside not long before you came. He seemed to case the place.”
“I’ve been better.” It was the truth. Seeing Marsh again rattled me with his angry determination to win me back. I thought back to Hayden and wished he was here by my side. I wanted to throw myself into his arms and drown in the scent of pine on his skin.
“I know you told me not to but, next time, is it okay if I call the police? Marsh is too slimy to let free-roam.”
I shook my head, getting the images of Hayden out of my mind and bringing myself back to the moment, “No, he’s harmless. He’ll get what’s coming to him soon enough, I am sure.”
With an understanding nod, Will gave my shoulder a firm, reassuring squeeze, “We are here for you any time you need it. Okay? Call me or Javier any time.”
“I will, thank you Will.” He gave a charming salute and jogged back across the street to his and Javier’s large house and long driveway. He stopped halfway to turn and wave back, making sure that I got safely into my home.
I gave a small wave back and pushed inside, dragging my gear across the floor. I was tired, but not physically tired. The exhaustion dragged at my soul and pulled at the back of my eyes.
Why did I feel this way? Why did my heart ache and my skin itch when thinking about Hayden?
I promised myself just that once, just the one daring time to be free from the rules of society. But now I was stuck here, in a daze of sorrow and desire, remembering his grin, his body, his...
Stop, stop!Goodbye, Hayden Storme.That was the deal, just the one time. No strings attached.
Why did he have to say that he wanted strings? Why did he have to ask me on a date?
The thoughts make me shiver in the heat and darkness of my living room. I sprawled across my sofa, hands in my hair, thinking.
I needed to get back to Yosemite, finish that hike. I would not let Marsh’s words get to me. Once the hike was over, I would be back in the real world, actual work, and my genuine job. Yes, that is what I would do. Finish the hike to prove it to myself and let go of these feelings about Hayden.
Listening to the silence of my home gave me too much room to think.
And I think I made a mistake.
