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“I see myself fine."
“Yes, love." She stepped forward, taking my hands. “You see yourself as smart and capable, which obviously you are. You're a badass. You are a Rogues agent."
"Not a full-fledged one."
She pressed her lips together firmly. “You don't need anyone to tell you that you're great."
"Like you said, I'm smart and capable."
“Yes, but you’re also beautiful. And deserving of love. And more than just one thing. You're sexy and stupidly stunning without even trying. The fact that you don't even wear makeup is just like shocking to me."
“I'm not the sexy one. That's a fact."
"No, you feel that way because you've been dealing with men who aren't worthy and cannot see the inherent sexiness in you being you. Like it or not, Lachlan King saw it, and it hurts now that he's forgotten that night. And it's okay for it to hurt. That just sucks. But again, you didn't do anything wrong."
Hearing her saying that to me, I knew she was right. “It sucks."
“I’m sorry love. He’s not just pretending not to remember. Those memories of you are actually gone.”
My idiotic heart squeezed. He wasn't going to suddenly remember. That memory was gone and forgotten, and it would be better if I forgot it too.
Besides, he was a trainee. And Rogues agents weren't allowed to fraternize. So whatever the hell feelings I was having on the topic, they were a moot point. Nothing could happen either way.
Lachlan king wasn't for me.
* * *
Saffron
The following morning,I was still reeling from what Tabatha had told me. It should have been easy to let it go and move on. But here I was still thinking about it. About him. Obsessing over every whispered caress.
I’d been hands-off with him because I was hurt. I’d thought he was an average fuckboi who shagged so much he didn’t remember me. Then I’d thought he was lying. Then possibly a plant by Gabe. When in truth, we had done this to him. Wiped me clean from his memory.
I’d been treating him like shit. In my defense though, he’d been flirtatious and I’d thought he was fucking with me.
I was so busy trying to put Lachlan King out of my head that I wasn't paying attention as I walked down the training hallway, and a hand clamped around my upper arm as another hand slammed over my mouth, and I was dragged into a medical supply cupboard.
“If you scream, we're both dead."
I glared up mutinously at the very same idiot I had on the brain. Lachlan.
“Do not scream," he repeated.
I narrowed my eyes, but I nodded. Slowly, he released my mouth. The moment he did, I spat out, "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"
“I could ask the same of you, sweetheart." He didn't put the requisite amount of space between us. I could feel every single one of his tensed muscles thrust up against me, and fuck me, my nipples were hard.
I swallowed hard as I glowered up at him. “You're in my house, arsehole."
"Might I add that's not entirely of my own free will. I heard what you said the other day about refusing to train me. My understanding is it's your job. And you just need to train me, or I'm going to die in the field.”
“You seem to be doing just fine without me. You did so well at your last training module that we don't actually have any need to train together.”
The thing was, I had already decided to train him properly. Because he was right. If he didn't get refined one-on-one training, something bad was going to happen in the field. The fact that he made it this far was a testament to his natural ability.
" You really want me to go to Gabe with this?"
“Going to run off and tell, are you?" What the hell was wrong with me? Feeling him this close to me, his sandalwood musk wrapping around me, the way I could feel his warm breath against my cheek… How dare he stand in front of me looking so good while trying to force me into training him? Yes, I’d already been assigned, but I had planned on taking my own sweet time about it.
