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Never sleep with a man more than once!
He takes a step toward me. I step back. He stops. I gather every ounce of sass I own to clear my face of any expression and will my body to move, creating more space between us. Spinning on my back foot, I turn my back on him and lose myself in the crowd. I pretend the attraction rippling between us doesn’t exist.
A few backpackers come to stand by Max and I. Two of them are guys from Sweden, and hot in that blond and sun slathered way. They’re the type I usually hook up with, just for a little entertainment. It’s never more than that. I don’t need more than that. Wanting more than that is bad news.
“Boys, meet Simmi,” Max says, introducing us.
Leaning in, she whispers, “You could use the distraction.” She strolls off to light a special fag.
Fuck!
Two pairs of ice-blue eyes stroke my face, breasts, and thighs. Any other time, and we’d be heading for their place and a night filled with sinful debauchery. But oddly, I’m just not feeling the usual zing of lust and excitement. Well, not toward them.
“Hi, I’m Simmi.” I reach out a hand and shake each of theirs.
Their gazes grow hungrier. Perhaps they are what I need to get him out of my system?
“I am Jurgens, and this is Sven. We like to share.”
His comment causes my insides to flip, but not in that dramatic I’m so down for this sort of way. I push the odd sensation out of my head. I try to convince myself that a thorough, sin-filled fuck will cure my woes. Then I can forget the one who’s ruined me for all others. I need a night to top all the ones I’ve spent with him. There has to be an antidote to this eternal fretting, needing, soul-riveting tsunami which crashes over me whenever I think about him. Which is every damn moment of every damn day!
My eye catches movement behind the sharing buddies. It’s Jay. His circling like a lion on the prowl. His expression is anything but friendly. He’s made no secret of how much he wants more of me.
But I can’t. He’s not just another distraction. Being with Jay is like shifting mountains, and I won’t fall for him. I can’t. Love is a fable, a lie you tell your daughters so they’ll settle down into a life of unhappiness. Mom and Dad are my everyday reminder of how love is bullshit.
