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Maintenance Inspection stares back at me in green marker from inside the square with today’s date. I let out another breath, this one less steady. I had forgotten about the apartment complex’s yearly inspection. The building has a new maintenance man after Roger retired, and I haven’t met him yet.
I hate having to interact with new people, especially strange men. It's the worst kind of hiccup in my routine. The doorknob feels cold in the sweaty palm of my hand, but I force myself out of the house anyway. My heart is beating hard in my chest as I make my way into the heat of a Southern California morning.
It’s far too bright, and the dry sunshine washes over me in shimmering waves. One foot in front of the other, I set off towards the elementary school where I work. It’s only a three-block walk. Usually, I enjoy the solitude and sounds of the city waking up. Today, every sound is too close, too loud.
Halfway to work, I turn around, defeated.
I pull out my phone, my thumb hovering over a familiar contact. Penelope is my best friend and the vice principal at Thorn Street Elementary.
"Pen," I start talking as soon as Penelope's voicemail chimes. "Can you arrange a substitute for kindergarten, please?"
I swallow hard, trying to think of the best way to explain that today was just too hard. In the end, I decide she knows enough about me to understand.
“I’m sorry.” I hang up quickly
It's not quite seven-fifteen when I reach my front steps again. According to my schedule, I should be unpacking the morning's art supplies and getting ready for circle time. Instead, I'm already done for the day. I feel a little untethered without the routine to guide me.
A landscaper I’ve never seen before waves at me as I pass. The giant hedge clippers in his pudgy hand don’t do much to ease my rattled nerves. Relief floods my over-stimulated mind as my apartment comes into view.
“Hey, guess who’s home early—” I stop, my keys in hand as I reach for the door.
The solid slab of my front door is open, sitting slightly ajar. Every lock and deadbolt is open.
This was not in today’s plans.
