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JACKSON
PRESENT DAY…
Sitting in the parking lot of the high school, waiting for the Valentine’s Day dance to start, I’m mindlessly scrolling through video after video on YouTube. At first, this was something I had not planned on attending. Especially since I never have before. Hawk Bend is a sleepy town, and the kids are pretty good. Nothing more than normal teenage stuff ever happens here. But on Friday, the principal caught me just as I was heading out and asked if I could help chaperone. It appears one teacher had to bail out because of a family emergency. And since I’m a sucker, this is where I’m spending my Saturday night.
A couple of cars park, and I see Lyndsey and a few others make their way inside. After a few minutes, Rory pulls her Jeep into the spot next to mine. I watch as she messes with her hair before applying some lip gloss. She looks out her driver’s side window and smiles at me. Waving at her, I exit the truck and walk over to open the door for her. Rory’s wearing a long sleeve red shirt that has the word love written across her chest in white. She’s got on my favorite pair of dark denim jeans, the ones that fit her so well you’d swear they were painted on, plus red and white Converse. Rory catches me looking at her shoes and points her foot at me, giving it a little wiggle.
“Adam would freak out if any of us showed up in heels. The kids are one thing, but he expects us to know better.” She wags her finger and drops her voice a few octaves to mimic the PE teacher.
“I was only going to point out how festive you look,” I reply, truthfully. She looks cute, yet sexy as hell at the same time.
“Ah, I see. Maybe my festiveness is only noticeable because you are looking very formal dressed in uniform.”
The two of us walk side by side toward the school. “That’s because I’m technically on duty, even if I am off the clock.”
“I’m sorry you got talked into this. We literally couldn’t get anyone else to agree to chaperone. You were our last resort before we had to call parents. You know no one wants their mom or dad here.”
“It’s fine, really.” Honestly, there are worse places I could be.
We walk the hallways in a somewhat comfortable silence. After leaving the bar, Rory and I have seen each other a handful of times. But since that night, I’ve had a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach. I know exactly why Rory got pissed off at Brad. She’s always been a very independent person and can’t stand feeling suffocated. So him showing up out of the blue is possibly the worst thing he could’ve done. But it felt like there was more to it.
The look on Rory’s face told me her anger wasn’t just over his surprise. She looked genuinely unhappy. Despite my feelings, I’ve always tried to remain neutral regarding the men she dates. As long as they treat her right, I accept them. What else can I do? All I’ve ever wanted is for her to be happy, even if that means being with someone who isn’t me. But now I’m torn because I think she’s about to make a huge mistake this time.
“Minor crisis,” Lyndsey announces from across the gym. “Rory, I need you.”
“Now what?” She sighs. “See you around the punch bowl.” Rory squeezes my elbow before walking away.
After being asked to carry out the plastic folding tables for the refreshments and helping the DJ carry in his equipment, the dance is finally underway. All the chaperones are strategically spaced out to make sure nothing inappropriate happens on the dance floor or otherwise. God, sometimes I really hate being the adult. It feels like only yesterday it was me out here with my friends, dancing with whichever girl I had asked to be my date.
“Do you ever get déjà vu?”
I’m so focused on keeping the kids in line that I hadn’t even noticed Rory standing next to me.
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. Sometimes, when I walk these halls with you or Lyndsey, the memories are just so real. It’s as if we’re still sixteen ourselves.” She looks out over the dancefloor and wrinkles her nose. “Then one of these actual teenagers calls me ma’am and ruins the entire fantasy.”
“Being at a dance with me can’t be giving you déjà vu.” Rory’s eyes meet mine and she knows exactly what I’m talking about. “You and I never got to do this.”
Homecoming senior year, the day was supposed to be a big one for me. The college scouts were there to watch me play, and Rory and I were going to the dance together that night; only, things didn’t go as planned. During the fourth quarter, I got hit. Hard. My body was thrown one way and my left knee went the other. Both my ACL and MCL were torn. They carried me off the field, and I was having the first of two surgeries within hours. That day, my entire future changed. No more football, no more college. In a split second, everything I had been working toward was just gone. I spiraled into a depression that sometimes even Rory couldn’t snap me out of. For years, I watched as everyone around me lived while I dwelled on what could’ve been.
“Yeah, you did little dancing the rest of senior year. But you bounced back.”
“Took me long enough.”
“All right, Hawk Bend,” the DJ’s voice carries over the sound system. “This is the last slow one of the night. Make it count.”
Holding my hand out, palm side up, I look down at Rory. “Can I have a do-over?”
“Hmmm.” She wrinkles her nose at me, unsure. Then she smiles. “Ok.”
Eagerly, she places her hand in mine, and I spin her before pulling her into my arms. The top of Rory’s head rests chin level on me, and I can’t help but breathe her in. She smells like marshmallows, just like she always has. All these years and she still uses the same vanilla scented products. I rest my chin on the top of Rory’s head and pull her closer to me. Out of all the what-ifs in my life, she is my biggest regret.
The two of us sway in silence as if we’re the only two in the room. I notice a few of the kids watching us and giggling, but I don’t care. Having my best girl in my arms is all that matters.
“This song is kind of sad,” Rory says.
I pull away from her slightly so I can see her face. “I’ve never heard it before.”
