AllFreeNovel
Share Us
My parents share custody of my little brother now, and while Gaten still lives in our old house, Dave’s moved out. I’ve been calling Gaten monthly since I left for Duke, but I can’t bring myself to visit him—not if it means seeing the house I grew up in empty. There used to be so much love in that house. So much life.
Now, there’s just… quiet.
“You should take it,” I say. Dave nods, and Jesse takes the hint, getting up to allow him to pass.
“You go on without me. I’ll be right back,” Dave promises and heads out of the restaurant.
Realization slams into me as soon as he walks away. “Wait… If you’re my father, then that means you and Bex…”
“Had sex?” Jesse completes my sentence, his voice dripping with shame. “Yeah.”
“Hey, I’m not judging you. It’s just… you were so young. How did that even happen?”
I can practically see the memories unraveling before his eyes. “It was the night she tried to run away. Before I even knew that our foster dad was abusing her. I found her packing her things while everyone was asleep. I was just a kid, but… when I saw her with that bag… Jesus, I thought I was going to die. I couldn’t imagine staying in that home without her. I begged her to let me come with her, but she wouldn’t let me. She said I was too young. That one day, I’d be eighteen and I could get out of the system, get a job, a life. She said I’d be throwing all that away by following her. She knew she’d most likely end up on the street, and she wanted more for me.”
“Then what happened?”
“She was about to leave, and I just… panicked. I couldn’t find the words to make her stay, and I was so desperate, I didn’t even realize what I was doing. I’d been in love with her since we were two kids telling each other stories in an attic, and I told her in the only way I knew how. I kissed her, and she… she started to cry. I pulled away and apologized, but she asked me to do it again. I didn’t understand it in the moment, but I think she was in disbelief. That pig had convinced her that she’d never have a choice. That human contact would always be a miserable experience. Things just… escalated from there.”
My throat feels like it’s coated in razor blades.
“Afterward, I begged her to stay, and she did. For nine months, that is. I told myself she was staying for me, but I think she didn’t want to be out on the street while she was pregnant and vomiting every half hour.”
My mind is racing. She must’ve known that as soon as she gave birth, her time was up.
“When did you know? That she was pregnant?”
Guilt clouds Jesse’s features. “I caught her puking her guts out in the bathroom one day. She lied and said she had a stomach bug, but when it didn’t go away, I told her she needed to ask our foster parents to take her to the doctor. The look on her face when I mentioned it. You would’ve thought I’d just asked her to sacrifice a bunch of kittens on an altar of fire. She was horrified.”
Poor girl probably thought she’d get in trouble if anyone found out she was pregnant.
“She refused, but I was so worried about her I didn’t give a rat’s ass. I told her if she didn’t do it, I’d ask them myself. Then she just burst into tears. Told me everything, including what the bastard had been doing to her. She was convinced he was the father.”
She waited until she had absolutely no choice but to tell him. How a fourteen-year-old girl could carry that burden alone for so long is beyond me.
“What did you do when she told you?”
“Nothing… at first,” he says, and judging by the way he nibbles on his bottom lip, he’s not proud of what happened next.
I give him some time to gather himself.
“A few days later, I tried to smother him in his sleep. Problem is, he wasn’t really asleep.”
I can just see it. A twelve-year-old boy, hopelessly in love with his best friend, too young to understand what it meant but old enough to know he’d do anything to protect her.
“Then he broke my ribs,” he adds. “Usually, when I’d piss him off, he’d starve me for a few days or lock me in my room for hours on end, but he’d never laid a hand on me before. I could barely walk by the time he was done with me.”
I’m speechless. Jesse used to say he envied me. That he’d do anything to forget the years he spent in that hellhole. Now I know why.
“Did your foster parents know that she was pregnant?”
“Not at first. She managed to hide it with large clothing for a while, but it eventually caught up to her. By the time they found out, she was too far along to get an abortion. And trust me, they would’ve made her get one in a heartbeat if that had been an option. They took her out of school and moved her into the basement. They wouldn’t even let her eat at the kitchen table with the rest of us. They treated her like she had the plague or some shit. When our foster siblings started asking questions, they claimed she’d gotten knocked up by some guy she went to school with. They knew that they could never tell the truth without incriminating themselves.”
“Wait… They? As in, your foster mom knew her husband was abusing those girls?”
A hateful laugh rips from Jesse’s throat. “Of course she knew. Who do you think gave him the idea?”
Nausea rolls through my stomach.
