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Staring at myself in the mirror, I can’t help but wonder what the hell is wrong with me. I’m so messed up, I can’t even think straight. I fucking slept in Cohutta’s bed last night. Actually slept there, without bouncing the hell out after we were finished. I’ve never stayed like that, not since Zayan. I’ve never wanted to.
Cohutta feels safe.
Then Marnix came busting in, like he was ready to burn the world down. As soon as he saw us together, he looked like someone had punched him. He looked betrayed, hurt, and angry as hell.
My smart mouth just couldn’t help itself either. I was still feeling the sting from his shitty comments, and how he didn’t even stand up for me when I was being treated like garbage.
I shouldn’t have fucked Cohutta last night. I know that, Cohutta knows that, but the magnetic energy coursing through us every time we’re in the same room just couldn’t be controlled. I was mad at Marnix, and desperate to forget about it all. I was still hurting, and I needed a place where I could just be myself.
Fuck.
I fucked up. We all fucked up, and now this is a giant, chaotic mess.
I need to get away from this house, to get some space between me and all the bullshit going on around here lately. I know just the place to keep my mind occupied.
I give myself a once-over, making sure my hair and makeup are perfect. To be honest, my mind was racing so fast as I got ready, it’s like I was on autopilot. I don’t remember putting on eyeshadow at all. I barely even remember leaving Cohutta’s, that’s how deep in my own head I’ve been.
“Ready to go?” I grab my phone and walk toward where Rush is standing. He’s wearing his typical all-black attire, and the sleeves of his shirt are clinging tightly to his thick biceps. I have to resist staring at them.
I’ve got fucking issues. I need to stay away from all men.
“Ready. I’ve let Nix know where we’re going,” he says formally, like he has to be professional around me. He’s got a gun, which is barely noticeable unless you're looking, strapped to the inside of his waistband.
“Did he need to know?” I groan, knowing that he’s just as pissed at me as I am at him. If I thought a few days ago there was going to be anything salvageable between us, that seems pretty much dead and gone now.
“I know you don’t like having me around all the time, but it’s his rule that I inform him of where we are at all times.” He’s just doing what he’s supposed to do; I can’t be mad about that. No matter how much I want Rush on my side, he’s Marnix’s employee and always will be before he’s my friend.
“It’s not that I don’t like you around. He just doesn’t always need to know what I’m doing.”
Instead of answering me, he just gives a curt nod, knowing this argument would probably go on forever with no end if we let it. He ushers me outside, and we approach the car with him opening the back for me.
“Nah, I’ll sit up front with you.” I try to shut the door, but he holds it firm.
“You can’t,” he protests.
“Is there not a seat up there or something?” I tease, but he’s not smiling back at me. Apparently, this is a bigger deal than I expected.
“You have to sit in the back. Nix wouldn’t like it.”
Marnix doesn’t like anything. I’m sure this has something to do with the reason he has a driver in the first place. It’s all about appearances. I’m sure having your wife sit up front in a vehicle isn’t appropriate for rich assholes, but I’m also pretty sure having her work at a restaurant on the West Side would be frowned upon as well, so this argument doesn’t seem valid.
“Well, Marnix isn’t here, so I’ll sit up front.” I move around Rush’s body, pull open the front door, and stand there with my eyebrows raised, waiting for him to argue.
“So damn stubborn,” I hear him grumble. He looks at me like he’s torn between letting it go and fighting me on the issue. He’s trying to decide whose wrath will be worse—mine or Marnix’s.
“Get used to it, double-oh seven.” I slide in and shut the door behind me, cutting off anything else he might have to say. He rounds the hood, shaking his head, before getting in and starting the vehicle.
The drive to Star of India is quick, and the moment I see the worn-down building, my heart feels a little lighter. This is my happy place. No matter what threats Marnix throws my way, I will do whatever it takes to make sure this place stays open, and my parents’ legacy lives on.
The restaurant is operating in full swing when I step through the door. We’ve been open for about an hour already, and there are a few customers scattered around. I see Rachel talking to some regulars, so I head back to the kitchen to check out how it’s going. Rush follows me inside, but he sits in a booth in the corner, giving me the space I need to work.
I get right to helping Rachel with tables, cleaning up where I can, and honestly just getting lost in the routine so I don’t have to think about my current predicament.
After we’re all caught up on customer orders, I decide to head on back to my office to look over the books. Looking over to Rush, I see his eyes are already locked on mine. He hasn’t stopped watching my every move since we’ve been here. He takes his job seriously, not wanting me to be out of his sight for a second. I give him a nod, and he stands, following me to the back office.
“Bored out there?” I ask. I imagine staring at me all day can’t be that thrilling.
“Not at all. It’s interesting,” he says thoughtfully.
