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PROLOGUE
Reaching over, I grab the knife and grip the cold metal tightly in my fist. This is the answer I was searching for. His mistake is a sign I need to end this, even if it causes me pain.
I can do this.
I am strong enough.
He won’t get what he wants.
Flipping the blade open in front of me, I stare at it longingly.Don’t back out now. He’ll take your life if you do.I run my finger across the cool metal before angling the handle so the sharp edge points down. My heart jackhammers in my chest, trying to psych myself up for what I have to do. No turning back now. I need to make sure he can never ruin another life.
If I don’t do this, he will. He’ll kill me eventually, and I don’t want to give him the power over me or anyone else. If I’m going to die, it’s going to be at my hands not his.
Zayan Pravesh, you won’t get the chance to ruin me again.
With all my might, I slam the knife into my stomach, twisting it as deep as it will go, letting blood pool around the blade.Fuck. Fuck. It hurts so bad.A shocked gasp leaves my body as pain ricochets through me. Sucking in large gasps of air, I have to remind myself that the pain will stop eventually, that it’s temporary. Maybe it will allow me to drift off into bliss instead of consuming me, but at least he won’t be able to hurt another innocent life. The sick part of me can’t help but feel relieved by what I did. Warm blood pours down my sides, quickly escaping me, but I smile. He won’t be able to hurt me or the possible little life growing inside me. I never want to hurt an innocent life, but it’s what must be done. It’s the only way to save us both.
He can’t get what he wants most in the world if I’m not able to give it to him. I plunge the knife deeper for extra measure trying to make sure I destroy every single thing he desires.
He’s not getting a baby from me.
He’s not going to control me.
I’d rather risk a painful death than live a second longer in this Hell.
On the drive to Tara’s parent’s, the tension surrounding Nix and Tara seemed less like murder and more like lust for once. They seemed to be less at each other's throats, calmer, and actually having a conversation without fighting. No matter what’s going on between her and me, it will be nice to see those two finally giving in to what everyone else can see. It’s clear they have feelings for each other. Feelings other than hate lean more toward love, but neither of them can pull their heads out of their stubborn asses to recognize the shift in their relationship.
I can’t know for sure, but Tara seems to have affection for all three of us, Reilly, Nix, and me. I should have a problem with that, but strangely, I don’t. Nix is like a brother to Reilly and me, and we’ve gotten even closer since Tara has been here so sharing her with those two doesn’t bother me.
She’s the type of woman who I’d give anything to just have a piece of. I might not have known her for all that long, but that’s the thing about her. The moment I met her, even after she tried to beat me up, I could feel that she was special and could possibly be important to me. Something about her instantly captivates you and makes you feel welcome, like coming home after a long day.
Tara is a conundrum.
She has an air of ease about her. She’s easy to talk to, easy to be around, and so laid back. She can capture the attention of anyone in a room. She’s easy to fall for, but the moment you break her trust, there would be no turning back.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, and she’s a firecracker on a good day.
Fuck, I know she and Nix have their problems, but there’s always an air of amusement between them when they go back and forth. I can’t imagine what she’s like when she actually hates you.
The only thing I’m unsure of is how Nix will react when he finds out how I feel about Tara. I don’t think Reilly would have a problem sharing, but Nix is… well, Nix. He’s controlling, demanding, and doesn’t like to be told what to do. Now that his relationship with Tara has developed into more, I can’t imagine he’d be okay sharing hiswifewith two other men—even his close friends—but maybe I’m wrong. I’ve noticed a shift in his lifestyle; he’s been doing things that have surprised me since she’s been around. Like coming home from work at a reasonable time, cooking, and he’s just overall less of an ass. One can only hope that he’d be open to the idea of sharing.
Hell, I don’t even know if Tara wants that, so I’m not sure why I’m imagining us all being hers. If she decides she only wants one of us and it’s not me, I’ll be gutted. The thought of not being with her sucks, but on the other side, I want her to be happy. Hopefully, it doesn’t come to that.
The sound of a door slamming snaps my attention to Nix coming out of the small home.What the hell? He wasn’t even in there long enough to have an entire dinner.He pauses for a moment, seeming to hesitate before walking toward me down the sidewalk. His steps are calm, almost too calm, but I see the anger slipping through the cracks of the mask he’s trying to keep on his face.
He’s trying to hide that something has pissed him off by covering it with a deceptively cool demeanor, but I can tell something’s bothering him. He’s acting the complete opposite from when he went into the house; gone is the seemingly carefree man. Something happened, and I plan to find out what the cause is. “Where’s Tara?” Anger radiates off his body no matter how hard he’s trying to keep it under control. He’s vibrating with tension.
“Get in the car,” Nix growls, stopping in front of me as I lean against the side of the car. He tries to go around me to get in, but I block his path to the passenger side door.
“Where is she, Nix?” I demand. His blue eyes spark with rage at my resistance as his chest heaves up and down.
“Rush, get in the fucking car. We’re leaving. Now.” His hands bunch into fists like he wants to punch me but knows better than that. He knows I can knock a man out with just one punch, considering it’s how he found me in the first place. I won’t hesitate to throw a hook to protect myself, even if it’s at him, and he sure as hell realizes that.
“What about Tara?” I push harder, trying to get him to tell me. After everything she’s told me about Zayan, meeting him, knowing how obsessed he is with her, and the threats from the fucking Draaks, it’s not safe for her to be alone. I can’t risk her life like that just because Nix is having a tantrum. I needed to tell him about Zayan, but she asked me not to. I understand it’s her story to tell, but the fucker is dangerous. For fucks sake, he used to rape, drug, and beat her until she almost died from an overdose. She needs to be protected from a monster like him. He seems like the type that won’t give up until he gets what he wants. She’s a possession to him, he’s abnormally infatuated, and I don’t doubt he’ll try to get to her any way he can. Even her parents love him because he’s got them fooled that much. She never said anything to them so they think he’s a fucking god walking among us.
“Jesus, fuck. Do as you’re told.” He huffs angrily, his jaw ticking with anger. “Who pays you? Who is your fucking boss?Meorher?” Something about the condescending tone in his voice and his dickish comment snaps the last thread of control I have.
Reaching out, I twist my hand into his shirt, spinning us around and slamming him against the car so hard it nearly knocks the wind out of him. His eyes meet mine, filled with a hint of surprise by my actions. “What the fuck is your problem, Nix? What happened in there?” I growl, pressing him harder against the car. Manhandling him is only serving to piss him off more, but it’s hard not to when he’s being a prick.
