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When we got home, we spent hours exploring each other’s bodies, taking it at her pace. She said earlier that she was ready, but once we got to the room, she decided she wanted to wait longer. I’m okay with going at whatever speed she needs, although I can’t wait until the day I’m going to have my way with her, and Reilly is itching to do the same.
Silently slipping out of bed, I throw on a pair of shorts and a hoodie and head outside. Just like I expected, Nix is leaning against the wall outside her door. I’m not sure when the last time he actually slept in a bed was. His gaze snaps to mine when I open the door, and I watch as the hope quickly drains from his face when he sees it’s me.
Nice to see you too, fucker.
“Hey, what are you doing up?” he whispers, trying not to wake the others.
“Couldn’t sleep.”
“Same,” he sighs.
“Since you’re awake, could you watch the cameras? I just need a few minutes.” A few minutes alone with my thoughts.
“Sure.”
As I head to walk away, Nix grabs my wrist. “You okay?” Genuine care shines in his eyes.
“Not really.” My reply is honest. I’m not sure how I feel right now, but I don’t have the energy to lie to him.
He nods. “If you need anything, I’ve got you.” It’s enough to let me know he cares about my well-being without pushing it too far. I’m glad he isn’t trying to pry because I don’t have the desire to get into it with him right now.
“Thanks.”
He lets me go, and I head outside without another word. I can finally breathe once the cool night air hits my skin. Closing the sliding bay door behind me, I lie down on one of the comfy-ass loungers by the pool trying to expel the chaos inside my head.
My mind goes from Jenny to Tara to Reilly and finally back to Jenny. I’ve been going to her grave ever since she was buried. Hell, I was even at her funeral. I stood in the back, hoping no one would notice me, but I was there. I watched her family and friends cry as the priest gave his speech and her aunt sing hymns.
I did that. I was the reason they had to go through that.
I was the cause of their sadness and misery.
I killed their daughter, sister, niece, friend and whatever else she was to the many people crowded around her casket.
Scott and his parents were there. Even though Scott set it all up and played me, I still felt like I should’ve been locked up, not seeing the light of day ever again. But I wasn’t. I was walking free while that young girl never took another breath. She was getting buried six feet under while I wished it was me instead.
The authorities had enough to probably put both of us away if they wanted. Nevertheless, they chose to push it under the rug for a hefty payday. They wanted to keep it quiet because of their status and fucking elections coming up. They even paid off the girl’s family. The sick part is that Jenny’s family accepted the bribe because they’re just as money-hungry as the Talbotts.
At this point, I might be the only one who cares about her and I’m the one who took her life. I don’t go to the grave as much as I used to, but I went there every day for over a year. I never once saw any of her family. Not a single one.
I’d change out the flowers about once a week. It wouldn’t bring her back, but it showed her that someone gave a shit.
The squeaky bay door causes me to jerk up as my heart pounds in my chest. All I can think about is how Tara might be in danger.
“Woah, calm down there, killer,” Reilly jokes. I hate the nickname because he has no idea how true it is. I’m relieved to see it’s only him coming out and no one else. I’m surprised though, since he was just sound asleep next to Tara. “I thought I’d come to check on you. Noticed you weren’t in bed anymore and I couldn’t sleep any longer either.”
“How long have I been down here?”
He smirks. “A few hours.”
Shit, I must have really been out of it. Letting out a deep breath, I sit back down on the lounger. “Damn, I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Mind if I sit?” Reilly gestures to the empty space beside me, and I nod. “What’s going on? If you want to talk about it.”
I’ve been getting closer to Reilly since Tara arrived and he deserves to know who he’s associating with as well.
“I killed a teenage girl a few years ago… it’s been eating at me lately, and I told Tara about it tonight.” The words rush out of my mouth before I can stop them, leaving me waiting for the surprise or disgust from Reilly, but it doesn’t come. He just sits there like I told him the sky is blue.
My eyebrows shoot up. “Got nothing to say about me being a murderer?”
