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Theo squeezed my thigh. I told myself to shut up. Stupid nerves.
“We’re on our honeymoon,” Theo added. “As you can imagine…”
Dr. Gonzales laughed. “Yes, yes. All right, let me see if the nurse has your results. The IUD will start working immediately upon insertion, so you won’t have to worry about that. I’ll be just a minute.”
When Dr. Gonzales disappeared, I loosed a breath.
“You’re doing great,” Theo said in the chair beside me.
“How hilarious would it be if I’m pregnant,” I guffawed. Theo cut a look at me saying,don’t you dare put that out into the universe.
“I’m kidding,” I said, taking my turn and rubbing his shoulder.
Dr. Gonzales returned, and the nurse who did my admittance tests was with him, pushing some contraption on wheels into the room with us.
“Mind if we do a quick ultrasound?” he asked. It was in the same tone he greeted us with, which meant normal people wouldn’t take issue with it. I, however, went on high alert.
“Why? Is there something wrong?”
“Not exactly.” Dr. Gonzales continued his chipperness. The nurse smiled kindly. “We may not be able to do the procedure. The urine analysis says you might be pregnant.”
My jaw dropped.
Theo popped off his chair like he’d popped off a gun. “Excuse me?”
“Indeed.” Dr. Gonzales clapped his hands. “Let’s take a look and confirm, shall we?”
I turned to Theo like he could somehow snap his fingers andpoofus out of there, but he returned my stare with just as useless a look. For two people who got themselves into and out of sticky situations with the flair of the lucky, in this moment we were buffoons.
Before I knew it, my legs were splayed, a white sheet draping over my thighs. What looked like a dildo with warm goo smeared over it was gently inserted into my hoo-ha. The nurse dimmed the lights and I automatically went in search for Theo. He spotted my flailing hand and grabbed it, keeping close to my side and squinting at the small monitor in front of us.
“Mmk,” Dr. Gonzales muttered. “Here we … this won’t take a minute. My silence doesn’t mean anything’s wrong, it just means I’m taking a look and assessing.”
“Okay,” I said, but it was more of a question. Was I meant to be worried at his silence? Which was more anxiety-inducing, finding a fetus or finding something else?
“Uh-huh, there we go. See?” Dr. Gonzales pointed to the screen, his glasses flashing against the light as he looked from it to us. “A heartbeat.”
“Holy motherfucking Jesus Christ,” Theo said.
Both the doctor and nurse jolted, and I didn’t bother to smooth out the situation. I was just as gobsmacked as him.
“Yep and let me see … oh yes.” The doctor moved his hand to show another part of my womb. “Both of their heartbeats are going strong.”
I froze. “I’m sorry.Both?”
“Sure as sugar, dear,” the nurse chimed in. “You’re having twins.”
“They’re about seven weeks along,” the doctor added. Two tiny lima beans were showcased in black and white on the screen, what seemed like lights inside them flickering in-and-out in a rapid-fire rhythm. Heartbeats.
I looked at Theo. It was unclear if I still had the capacity to blink. Theo looked like a hornet had stung him between his eyes.
“Darren…” I said.
He closed his mouth. Then opened it. Then closed it. His Adam’s apple bobbed. “We’re having twins,” he repeated. Much slower.
“We’re having twins,” I seconded. “Identical?”
“I’m seeing only one placenta, so yes. Identical twins. We can’t discern the gender via ultrasound until about twenty weeks, however, unless you want to do a blood test in a few weeks to find that out. Congratulations!” Dr. Gonzales smiled broadly, made more garish when the nurse switched the lights back on.
The spotlight was on me, but instead of flinching back, I found myself tracing my stomach, picturing a rounded curve and the tiny fireflies fluttering around inside.
Theo bent and laid his lips on my forehead, murmuring, “we’re fine.”
“Fine,” I echoed and met his eyes. “As in, our family will be fine.”
There were no windows in the examination room, no natural wind or puffs of air. Yet, a single rose petal fell from the bouquet and landed on the spot on top of my heart.
Start over with these new sisters, Letty. I’ll love you forever.
* * *
