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I can only imagine how Caleb is feeling now. I wonder if he can see us, see this and see the past and what happened to Nathan. The guilt he’s probably feeling worries me. It’s not his fault. Just like it’s not Nathan’s fault.
“Why didn’t you?” I ask, wondering when we’re going to take that last step.
“I knew he’d kill him. As troubled as our relationship was, we were still brothers. My brother had a temper.” One which I only witnessed once, when he threw plates against the wall. I can’t even remember what that argument was about, but I remember being scared and him instantly calming down. “He beat our father up pretty badly when he was only fourteen.”
“What?”
“It was bad. My father had attacked my mum, but Caleb gave up after that because she still wouldn’t leave him and she chose him over us. I knew then that if Caleb found out what our grandfather had done, he would definitely kill him. So I never told him and our relationship got worse from there.”
I rest my head against his shoulder and close my eyes. The fresh air blows across us both, bringing me a little comfort as we take that final step.
“I don’t like this,” Nathan whispers and I open my eyes to see him looking at the thin layer of sand and grass beneath our feet. “But I’ll do it… for you.”
“Don’t do anything you’re not ready to do,” I tell him, taking another step forward.
His chest expands as he inhales a heavy breath and we take five more steps, stopping at the edge of the garden with our toes buried in the sand.
He grins, clearly proud of himself, and I grin right back at him. I’m proud of him too.
“I have something for you.” He digs into the pocket of his jeans and turns towards me. I gasp at the sight of my old necklace, the one I threw away when we first separated. Something shiny winks at me as the sky begins to glow orange. I stare at the object beside the flat patterned disk with the single tiny red gem and tears spring to my eyes. “I remember a while ago I told you that you needed to let him go.” His hands move around the back of my neck and he quickly fixes the clasp of the necklace. “I was wrong. He’ll always be a part of you, of Dillan… of us. Because of him, no matter what happens, we’ll always be connected. I’m grateful for that.”
A sob escapes me as I touch the engagement ring that Caleb gave to me so long ago. It hangs beautifully by the flat disk that Nathan made just for me.
I close my eyes, trying to calm myself as his thumbs brush the tears from my cheeks. “Thank you Nathan.”
“I want to marry you Gwen,” he adds softly and quietly and my eyes spring open.
He pulls my hand away from the necklace, smiling when Dillan tries to grab at it. Seconds later I feel something cool and slightly heavy slipping onto my ring finger.
“I want to die with you when we’re old and grey and have more grandchildren than we can count.” He runs his finger over the single diamond that’s surrounded by a cluster of smaller, more colourful stones. “You don’t have to say yes now, what with everything that has happened.” His eyes come back to me and his forehead rests against mine. My body shakes with emotion so I press it to his. “I understand if you’re not ready.”
“I am,” I breathe, pressing my lips to his. “I am ready.”
His tongue pushes into my mouth and his arms wrap around the three of us, Dillan, myself and the foetus in my womb.
He smiles, his eyes glistening, and he kisses Dillan’s open mouth before kissing my trembling one. “Tell me you love me.”
I laugh once and nod. “Always. I love you. You know I do.”
“Always,” he repeats, smiling even wider. Then he drops to one knee and places his lips against the skin of my navel.
I thread my fingers through his hair, softly stroking his scalp before he stands once more and claims my lips again. “Don’t give up on me. I don’t think I’ll ever be normal… but without you I’m broken.”
“Never,” I promise, lacing our fingers together as Dillan manages to grab my necklace and shove it in his mouth, making us both laugh and battle to pull it away.
I settle in Nathan’s arms, my cheek against his chest, and stare at the orange horizon. There may not be a setting sun, but it’s still beautiful, and in this moment it’s just perfect.
EPILOGUE
“DAD!” I wince at the sound of Emily’s screech as she comes in through the front door and quickly duck into the kitchen. There is no way in hell I’m getting involved with this one.
