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I twisted to Ryan. “Did you try it on with her before she decided?”
Ryan puffed out a breath and nodded. Ryan annoyed me for what he did, but... shit...
Kane loved Lacey. Did he just say that?
Then I remembered back to the conversation when Lacey was having x-rays and now it all made sense.
“But everyone needs to get over it like Lacey said. It’s done,” Kane said.
“I tried it on with Lacey that night and to be honest, I think that was why she ended it with us all,” Ryan said with a resignation in his voice but it still surprised me he was admitting to it. It was as though he felt he needed to get it off his chest. “I suppose it annoyed her that I tried it on with her and then owned up about my ex.”
I blew out a breath.
“And I’m shocked it was Kane, but I’m fine with it,” Ryan continued. “After the fallout, I never expected her to pick me, anyway.”
I gave Ryan a smile and shook my head. “Ryan, you’ve got it wrong. Lacey likes you as much as any of us. That’s why she ended all of us, because it upset her she lost you. I doubt it had anything to do with trying it on with her.”
I looked around the table. “You all thought this was about me and Lacey, and I was implicit in helping you think that. But none of you see how she is with each of you.”
I quietly seethed at the time she was spending with Ryan, laughing with him, meeting him to do mundane university work. Just being herself with him. Lacey and I had the most unique connection, much bigger than the others, but I still felt I had an uphill battle with the other men in her life. Angel Raphael warned me he would do it and it was hard that he had, but this could also be a blessing. More men to fight the Dark King, and a greater chance that this life would work.
“But we all see how she is with you, fun and flirty. It makes me jealous because I don’t want to be the one just helping her study,” Ryan countered. “You and her have this happy thing going on. You are both very touchy-feely with each other. Do you know what that is like to watch when I get to help her study?”
“You've got more than me Ryan. I’m her ex-boyfriend, and we have nothing yet. You’d think she’d have forgiven me by now,” Carter grumbled.
“That might change once she sees her real memory, but one thing I’ve realised is don’t piss off Lacey because she can hold a grudge,” Ryan said. “Oh, and maybe stop being all possessive with her. Making her think all you want is to bind with her and nothing else.”
Carter laughed and Kane cleared his throat.
“I know you all hate me now. But my feelings for Lacey have been there for a long time.” he cleared his throat and glanced at me. “Since I fought her, and that was over four years ago. I didn’t know who she was at the time but there was something about her, I never forgot her.” He laughed a little. “Then I finally saw her again at the ballet school. The feelings came hurtling back, but the plan was for us to help Carter win her back. When all the time I struggled because I was fighting my attraction to her.”
“Her attraction to you was there at the beginning,” Ryan said. “I saw the way she looked at you the very first time we saw her. The trouble is you both treated each other the same way.” Ryan hesitated. “Maybe you’ve both been fighting something. I’m glad it was you, Kane.”
I nodded, but for me, Kane being the one was sweeter than anyone would realise. Because each life before it was always me and each life before she died.
We died together.
This life was already different.
“Yeah, me too. At least you weren’t a dickhead about it,” I said, and waggled my eyebrows. “I’m not into virgins anyway, she’s got a little experience now.”
“You’re the dickhead, Seb,” Kane said, staring at me for a beat, and I still wasn’t sure if he remembered.
Carter stopped whatever was going through Kane’s head. “I’d have preferred it was me but, I agree and it could have been worse.” Carter said and hesitated. “It could have been Jack.”
“Or Blake,” Kane and I said together.
Chapter 46
Lacey
Istaredatmyreflection in the floor to ceiling mirror, my hands clenched into fists and emotion clogged my dry throat as I decided if I should storm downstairs and give the guys the full information about my true feelings for Kane or if that was a discussion for another time.
But it wasn’t just Kane. I knew my feelings for all of them were getting stronger and the reason I ended it before was because of how strong my heart beat when any of them were around me. Losing one of them was hard enough. I couldn’t cope losing any of them anymore.
I didn’t want to feel the same loss I felt from losing my parents. I wasn’t strong enough to feel that pain again.
But now it was harder because now I chose them to be my knights. I don't know when things changed but somewhere along the road, I let my guard down. Not sure at what point that was. Was it when the demon tried to kill me, maybe earlier than that?
