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Her face drops for a second, as if her mask has slipped. A moment later, she turns Jenya and herself toward me.
“The orange dress from the last store was better on Jenya, right?” she says.
I peer at them both, struck for a moment by their resemblance. Their hair color, their slightly big foreheads. The shape of their eyes and the shape of their noses. They’re all the same. Tanya’s face is more lined, marked undoubtedly by the horrible years under Penelope and Valerie’s rule of Lavender. And yet…
“Ben?” Tanya prompts.
“The orange dress was better,” I say reluctantly. I don’t want to go back, but it’s true.
After Tanya has paid for her blue dress and some underwear for Jenya, we head out, and I do my best to be inconspicuous as I look for the guy in the baseball cap and his partner.
I see him near the entrance, scrolling on his phone as usual. As we go into the previous store, he doesn’t follow us, and I relax a little. Maybe it was my imagination.
“So, what do you think about the clothes of this world?” I ask Jenya ten minutes later, while Tanya is at the cash register, paying for the orange dress.
“I like that there are shirts that sparkle and skirts that have flowers on them. There are some clothes that lack fabric and show too much, or are very tight, but the opportunity to try on and reject them is fantastic.” She beams, but her smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “You’re taking me to the other children after this, right?”
“That’s the plan,” I say in a jolly voice. My happiness is not reflected in her eyes. “Isn’t that what you wanted? To join the children?”
“Well, no. Yes. I did. But that was because I thought this world was completely different, and that there was no one like me.” She glances at Tanya, and for once I think I’m able to decipher the feeling. She’s found a role model.
“Uhm, Tanya can’t commit to a longer relationship probably. You’re still a minor,” I mumble under my breath, trying to sound as inoffensive as possible.
“What is a minor?” Jenya’s brows furrow.
“Let’s go to the cinema,” Tanya says as she joins us, and I’m spared from having to explain.
Jenya’s attention shifts quickly to Tanya’s summary of what the cinema is, and I tune them out as I look for Baseball Cap Guy. He’s nowhere to be seen, though I do spot his partner trying on sunglasses from one of the knick-knack shops. He’s already wearing the jeans he tried and bought before, so my suspicions ebb and flow again. It’s bizarre. Maybe I should call Ivo?
No. I’ll just stick to Jenya and Tanya like glue. It won’t be difficult considering we’re going to be in the cinema for the next couple of hours. I’ll keep us all safe.
Chapter 20
“It’s dark,” Jenya says in between deep breaths. She’s trying to calm herself down.
Tanya reaches over and squeezes her hand.
“It’s a safe darkness. No danger and no punishments. Like a big TV, you’ll see,” she says in a voice that carries her smile across. Jenya nods and exhales a shaky breath.
The film Tanya picked is a cheesy romantic comedy. I’ve watched a few, courtesy of boredom and the free streaming service at the Arcana Headquarters, and they’re all carbon copies of each other.
“Spoiler, they’re going to get together in the end,” I whisper in Tanya’s ear after the two main characters have met in a bakery and the woman has spilled some coffee on the man.
“It’s not about the outcome, but about the journey,” Tanya whispers back, unknowingly injecting hope into me that everything will be fine between us too. We’re just in the middle of our tumultuous journey.
I’m sitting between her and Jenya, making sure they’re both within arm’s reach. As we were shuffling in the dark room, I was watching the crowd like a hawk. There was no one suspicious.
“This will be good learning,” Jenya says to me, louder than comfortable. “The women in our village would never behave this way. Or look this way. Or—”
“Shh.” Someone behind us is unhappy.
“We have to be quiet in the cinema so other people can enjoy the movie too,” I whisper.
“Oh, like prayer time.” She nods and sits back, her hands touching in a prayer gesture.
I’m not religious and have never been, so I can’t comment on how close the two activities are, but I hope watching people fumble their way into love is more entertaining than mind-projecting your desires into the universe.
In any case, I’m a bit bored. I glance at Tanya again, a crazy, inappropriate idea forming in my mind. Her forearm is on the armrest, the pale skin of her fingers inviting me to entwine them with mine. The big diamond ring she used to wear in Lavender is missing.
