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“Please!.” I’ve never whimpered for anyone before. Never begged them to relieve me like this. My shame is a whisper, drowned out by the roaring current of electricity channeling between us, though. I’m so delirious that I pay it no heed. “Please. Please.Please!”
Theo is relentless. There’s no mercy in him. He leans back, his golden-brown eyes locking onto mine, and his grim look of determination tells me that begging is futile. He’s set his mind to this task, decided how he’s going to make me purr, and no amount of pleading will change that. Again, and again, he repeats his actions, and with each repetition, I feel a little more of myself whittled away, my consciousness plummeting into the depths of insanity.
“Fuck. Oh my god. Please!”
He slams himself in deep once more, and an impossible heat kindles between my thighs. “FUCK, THEO! I CAN’T—OH MY GOD, I’M GOING TO—” I lock up, my blood a raging inferno in my veins, fire licking at my insides…but I don’t come. I almost burst into tears when he starts rocking himself into me again, not enough, too shallow, rubbing against the spot inside me that wants more.
“Shh. It’s okay. It’s coming. It’s coming,” he murmurs breathlessly. “I’ve got you, Kid. It’s coming now, I promise.”
Theo Merchant doesn’t break his promises. At least not this one. When he drives himself into me for the last time, the explosion of sensation that tears through me leaves me incoherent and screaming. It overcomes me all at once, detonating everywhere, in what feels like every cell of my body. I can’t breathe. My vision sways and for one heart-stopping moment, goes black. I don’t even fucking care. I gasp, arching off the bed, an unimaginable ecstasy coursing through me, crashing down on me as Theo pumps himself into me.
He lets out a tight groan, shaking against me, and I feel him emptying inside me. The knowledge that he’s coming does something to me that I’ve never experienced before. I cling onto him, desperate to be as close as possible, and this time he gives in and lets it happen. He collapses against me, blowing hard, his heart thundering in his chest so fiercely that I can feel the rapid-fire beat of it against my breasts, through both of our shirts.
“God, Kid,” he whispers breathlessly. “You’re gonna be the death of me one of these days.”
A strange thing to say right now. But hell, my brain isn’t working properly, either. My mind is filled with a high-pitched ringing sound and not much else. We lay tangled together for a long moment, and gradually both our racing hearts slow. Theo breathes into my hair and my neck,hishair tickling my nose, and the smell of mint and winter air bathes my senses. He draws small, light circles on my collar bone with shaking fingers, and I stay as still as possible, concentrating on this moment and this moment alone.
I know what’s to come.
Any second now, the guilt will arrive. It’ll show up gun’s blazing, staggering me with the force of its power, and I will hate myself. Nothing on heaven or earth will allow me to forgive myself for this act of betrayal. In letting this happen, I’ve doomed myself to a lifetime of misery. Rachel—
Rachel.
The mere thought of her name sets the wheels in motion.
“You need to go,” I whisper into Theo’s hair.
“Sorrell—”
“No, Theo. Please.” My voice is choked with tears. “Just go.”
14
SORRELL
I wake to a pounding headache.I can’t see the wound on the back of my head no matter how creatively I angle my makeup compact and the mirror on the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. I can feel it, though, and the two-inch long gash is swollen and hurts like a motherfucker to touch. I shower and get ready for class, wincing at the brilliant shafts of sunlight that lance through Toussaint’s stained-glass windows as I make my way toRosewood—typical that the one day the weather picks up around here is the one day that heavy cloud cover would actually be a blessing instead of a curse.
Everyone is talking about Sebastian hurling that stupid soda can at my head. I hear them whispering about it as I sit at my desk, rummaging in my bag for a notepad and pen. I’ve barely given the incident in the hallway any thought myself—I’ve been too preoccupied with what happened in my room last night to think of anything else—but it seems as though the rest of the school hasn’t been thinking of anything else.
“Are you okay?” Ashley asks, sitting down in the seat next to mine. “I heard about Seb. I know he feels terrible about it.”
I laugh bitterly, cutting her a dour sidelong look. “Does he? Really?”
“Yeah. He does. I saw him this morning at breakfast and he was pale as a ghost. He was just so pissed about being stuck here, and the party being ruined, and—”
“And he hurled a projectile at me to make himself feel better?”
Ashley frowns at me like I’m being difficult. “You don’t understand what it’s like here sometimes. You’re…” She huffs, frown growing deeper as she appears to search for the appropriate word. “You’re new. We’ve been stuck here a long time. Sometimes it feels like we’re never gonna get the hell out of here. Resentment builds.”
“I’m sorry, why are you even talking to me right now? I wasn’t under the impression that we were friends.” I called her bestie out on some pretty dark shit, my first day here. She saw how disgusted I was with the shit that was going down at the First Night party. She—
Goddamnit.
My head hurts too much for this.
I slam a black ball point pen down onto my desk. “Look, Ashley. Tensions run high. I get it. This is also high school, and no matter how excellent a person’s breeding and how wealthy their parents are, I know that doesn’t stop them from being dicks and acting like children. I didn’t snitch about the party. I don’t know why Ford didn’t call me up to perform in the auditorium, but I promise you, I was not the cause of the sanctions Ford placed on us. I was as bound and restricted by them as everybody else. Now please go back to your own seat. I have a banging headache and I can barely see. I just wanna be left alone.”
She looks like she wants to argue, but when she opens her mouth, nothing comes out. She shakes her head in what appears to be frustration, then grabs her bag from under the desk and moves back to her usual spot by the door on the other side of the room.
