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“It is but you know what?” Clara sat forward. “That same boy found me years later. While what we had in high school will never happen again, we’re friends and honestly, that’s enough for me.” She shrugged. “I like Luna. I know she was shocked to find out that it was me you were supposed to go on that date with, but I also know that if you told her that date never happened, she’d believe you. Because she loves you.”
“I did tell her that it never happened.” I pulled back the rest of the water, wishing it was something stronger. “I can’t believe I let it get this far.”
“Listen.” Clara placed her hand gently on my arm. “Luna will forgive you.”
“I doubt that,” I mumbled. I wasn’t even sure if I could forgive myself.
“She will. I saw the way she looks at you.” Clara shrugged. “It would have happened if I wouldn’t have stopped it. Wouldn’t it?”
“Probably. But…” I looked down at my lap. “I think it would have been a lot of convincing my body to go along with it.”
“Yeah. Sorry, Zach. I like you and I consider you a friend, but I’m not attracted to you. Sure, you’re hot but that’s about it. And I don’t fuck guys I’m not attracted to.”
“Now I feel like an even bigger asshole because I’m not attracted to you either, but I wanted…”
“You wanted to fuck Luna out of your system,” Clara finished for me.
I nodded.
“I get it.” Clara took another swig of her beer. “What are you going to do?”
“I need to talk to her, but I already pushed her away. I don’t think I can handle it if she does the same to me,” I admitted. It was the first honest thing I had said all night.
“That’s understandable.” Clara threw back the rest of her beer and stood from the table. “I think you should either take some time to cool off, go work out or something, or go talk to Luna. But I would probably give her some time.”
I stood from the table. “Thank you. And again, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it, Zach.” She went to turn away when she paused. “Oh. I should ask though. Are you going to tell her about this?”
“Yeah.” Fuck, that was a conversation I was not looking forward to. “I am.”
“Good.” Clara went to the fridge. “Now leave so I can get drunk by myself.”
I chuckled. “Have a good one, Clara.”
I left her house, feeling lighter. The razor-sharp edge of the previous rage rushing through me had turned into a dull roar. I needed to see Luna. I just wasn’t sure if she would want to see me. If ever again.
***
(Luna)
It had been several hours since Zach left. Since he tore out my heart and stomped on it, leaving me a shattered mess. The girls and I got drunk off cheap wine, stuffed our faces with Meadow’s delicious desserts, and now I was lying in bed, wallowing in my own self-pity.
My head pounded but with as much wine as I had, it didn’t mask the feelings of hurt and anger I had toward Zach. How could he listen to my father after everything we had been through? How could he love me and push me away at the same time? I should have fought harder. I should have gone after him. I should have done something. Anything. But instead, I let him leave and got drunk instead.
I groaned, rolling over onto my stomach. The room spun. Looked like the buzz was wearing off and quickly. Turning onto my back, I let out a hard sigh.
The scent of musk invaded my nose, another smell following right along with it.
Sex.
My stomach twisted.
Sliding out of bed, I pulled the covers off of the mattress and tossed them on the floor. I was still wearing my black dress; the dress Zach had helped zip up. The dress that he loved every time he saw me in it.
Hooking my fingers in the hem, I ripped it up and over my head, tossing it to the floor. Pulling off my bra, I threw it aside and did the same with my panties. I stood in front of the bed, naked and alone.
My chest ached, my head throbbed, and I was tired. So damn tired.
