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And then he leans down, opens my robe, and makes me forget anything exists but him.
* * *
I’m deliciously sore when I make my way into work the next day. Normally Mondays feel like they drag forever, but the day passes quickly. I head to my last meeting of the day, and instead of dreading it like I had been when I saw it on my calendar on Friday, I’m now excited to talk about the Rapturous Intent documentary.
“So, Fletcher says that editing is on track and they should have the preview ready for us next week. From there, execs will decide if anything needs to be changed, or if it’s good as is,” Simone says.
“Is there concern it’ll need another round of edits after the preview?” I ask.
She gets a conspiratorial smile on her face, “Well, Becka, they are rock stars after all. I’m sure the camera caught some things that weren’t exactly aboveboard. You can’t have rock ’n’ roll without the sex and drugs.”
She turns to the rest of the group and continues while I sit back in my chair and process her words. “Of course, since we’re a subscription service, we have a lot more wiggle room to show sex and drugs. We just need to make sure it’s classy, and if it crosses the line, we’ll cut it. We don’t want to ruin these guys or no other celebs will ever want to work with us.”
Everyone nods in agreement, and the energy in the room has definitely gone up. We’re all eager to see how it turned out, but my excitement has dimmed in the aftermath of Simone’s words.
Am I going to have to watch Trent with other women?
We never talked about what happened on tour. We were a little busy doingotherthings. It didn’t even cross my mind to ask how many women he’d been with in the past eight months. My stomach swirls with nausea at the idea. But what right do I even have to be mad? I’m the one who ignored him. Of course, he’d hook up with other women. He was single.
But still, I feel a little heartbroken because I couldn’t even think about having sex with someone else in all the time we were apart.
By the end of the meeting, I’m relieved that it’s my last one of the day because my head is a mess, and all I want to do is talk to Trent. We already have plans, and he should be at my place by the time I get there. The whole drive home I keep going back and forth on whether or not I want to know.
When I pull up and see his handsome face break out into a huge smile at my arrival, I decide I don’t want to know. What good will it do? None. It’ll just add to my long list of insecurities, and I don’t need any help in that department.
He greets me with a passionate kiss that leaves my panties wet and my heart beating rapidly in my chest. I don’t know how he does it, but just being in his arms soothes me. I lean my head against his chest, wrap my arms around his waist, and hold him tight. I need to let this go and move forward with him. The past doesn’t matter.
“You okay?” He murmurs against my hair, his arms wrapped around me.
“Long day.”
“You sure that’s it?”
I pull away just enough to look up at him and see in his eyes his concern for me. “How’d you know something was bothering me?”
He smiles his cocky grin, and I’d roll my eyes if I wasn’t so curious. “I know you, Becka. Obviously more than you realize. So, you gonna tell me what’s up?”
“It’s nothing. We were just talking about the documentary today at work, and it made me think about our time apart…and you on tour…”
He squints, waiting for more, but I remain silent. “Uh-huh. Go on.”
I shrug my shoulders, and then finally roll my eyes because I feel ridiculous that I’m letting this eat at me so much. “And how many women were constantly around you.”
His piercing gaze never leaves my face, and I wish I knew what he seems so intent on finding in my gaze. He finally brushes a stray lock of hair from my face and tucks it behind my ear. He lets his hand rest there cupping my jaw and making sure I’m still looking at him. I feel immensely vulnerable right now, like he can see into my soul, but I don’t dare look away. I’m too mesmerized by his ocean-blue eyes.
“I was on the road for months without you, thinking nothing could happen with you. You want to know how many women I slept with?”
A surge of adrenaline blooms in my chest, and my heart constricts painfully as emotion clogs my throat. Is he trying to punish me for all the months I gave him silence by making me hear this? “How could you possibly think I’d want to know that?”
I step away from him, but he grabs my upper arms and holds me close, not painfully, but securely so that I’m still forced to look at him. “None.”
My breath freezes in my lungs, my heart stops, and the silence that follows that one word makes me question if I heard him right. “What?”
“None, Becka. Not a one. I didn’t even consider it. All I could think about was you. None of those women came close to tempting me because none of them were you.” He brushes his thumb across the apple of my cheek. “You’re the only one I want. I know you’re worried I’ll be tempted or leave you, but you’re stuck with me now because I’m hooked. I already gave you up once, and it was torture. I can’t do it again, Becka. I need you.”
I want to believe him more than I want my next breath.
I don’t want to be this girl who lets her daddy issues ruin the best thing she’s ever had—a friend and a lover all wrapped in one. A man who’s seen me at all the various stages of my life and never judged me. A man who after eight months of silence still returned to me, his heart in his hands.
