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“Are we going to Sauvie Island?”
He gives me a look that basically shouts that I’d ruined the surprise, “Maybe… Okay, fine. Yes.”
“The nudist beach?”
He laughs, “No, but damn, I can’t believe I didn’t think about that. What a great excuse to see you naked.” He looks over at me, smirking. “We’re going to the place where we had our first kiss.”
“The lighthouse?”
“Mhmm.”
I smile and squeeze Jack’s hand, which is resting on my leg. We went on a field trip in 7th grade to the lighthouse on Sauvie Island. I tripped on a log – I’m always so graceful – and Jack caught me. But after he caught me, he continued to hold my hand. He kept looking at our hands for at least a few minutes before he suddenly looked up at me, leaned in, and kissed me briefly on the lips. It was one of the first times where I wondered if we might end up together, if maybe someday we’d be a real couple. But neither of us ever said anything after that kiss, so I assumed it wasn’t a big deal to him. I honestly thought he’d forgotten all about it.
We park, and Jack pulls out a picnic basket and several blankets. We smile at each other, and then he entwines the fingers of his free hand with mine. We walk down the empty beach laughing and talking until we reach the lighthouse, and he sets up the picnic in a secluded spot. I’m so impressed to see all the little details that he thought of. He made me my favorite sandwich – ham and Swiss on a French roll– and even brought sparkling cider and champagne glasses.
My heart swells in my chest as I watch him set everything up. He’s always so thoughtful and sweet. I want to kiss him so badly, so I lean over and gently place my soft lips against his. He moans at the contact and slides his fingers through my hair to keep me close. I slowly pull my lips away but keep my forehead rested against his. The connection is sweet and familiar.
He looks at me softly, “What was that for?”
“For everything you do for me.”
“I just want to make you happy.” He seems so vulnerable when he says it.
“You do make me happy. So happy,” I whisper before leaning in and kissing him again. The kiss gets deeper, our tongues sliding across each other before he pulls away.
“Let’s eat before I totally lose control. I want this to be romantic for you.”
“This?” I ask.
“Yeah, this.”
He grabs my hand, turns it over, and kisses just inside my wrist. He looks at me, and I can see the desire and need in his eyes.
“Oh.”
This is happening. He brought me here so we could… we’re going to… holy shit, I’m freaking out a little bit, but in the best possible way. I’m ready. I’m more than ready. I’ve been thinking about losing my virginity with Jack more times than I can count.
“Is this okay?” He asks. He seems unsure of himself.
I kiss him again before whispering, “It’s perfect.”
Twelve
I’m way more nervous than I thought I’d be. I’ve heard all about sex in the locker room, and I’ve been endlessly hassled for not sealing the deal with Paige, yet, but I didn’t want to rush her. It’s become pretty clear that how I feel about Paige is different than how the other guys feel about their girls.
I didn’t expect to feel so nervous, though. I’ve been thinking about this almost non-stop since we started dating, but not once did I think I’d be the one trembling, with a knot in my stomach that’s all nerves and excitement.I really want this to be good for her.
Paige is smiling with her eyes closed, her head pointed up towards the darkening sky. The sunset behind her outlines her silhouette with a soft glow. She’s never looked more beautiful.
She takes my breath away.
My chest hurts at the thought that in one short month, I won’t get to see her every day. It feels so unfair that I get this taste of heaven for six months, and then it’s going to get taken from me.
Okay, maybe that’s a little dramatic. But still. I’m realistic enough to know that 16-year-olds can’t usually make long-distance relationships work. I shake my head slightly. I need to stop worrying about the future. I have Paige sitting right here looking more gorgeous than ever and she’s all mine. I need to enjoy these moments while I still have them.
I slide my fingers through her silken brown hair. I’m mesmerized by her and endlessly fascinated with the feel of her soft strands as my fingers glide through them.
Her eyes still closed, she lets out a soft little sigh, “I love when you do that. It feels so good.”
