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My body aches in ways it never has before. My legs are sore, my arms are sore, everything is sore, and I can’t stop crying. At this point, I’m pretty sure there is no water left in my body with all the tears I’ve shed.
I turn slowly in Lucas’s hold, grimacing at the sharp pain it brings. “Hey, you okay?” His voice is groggy but still full of concern.
I nod, then realize he probably can’t even see me with all of the lights off. “I’m just… sore.”
Before he can reply, his bedroom door creaks open. My body goes rigid and tight like it’s ready for a fight even though I know I’m in no shape to be kicking anyone’s ass. A large figure stands shadowed in the doorway for a moment before they speak. “What happened?”
Comfort and ease wash over me when I realize it’s only Julius. I’m not sure what it is, but I’ve always felt comfortable around Julius. Maybe it’s because he’s so quiet or because I know I have nothing to worry about when he’s around, but regardless, he brings me ease.
“Julius.” When his name leaves my mouth, a new wave of grief washes over me.
As much as Lucas makes me feel safe, I still worry about what Teddy will do if he found us like this. It’s something I shouldn’t have to worry about considering how he left me, but I can’t help it.
I stand from the bed and pad to Julius slowly. When my feet stop in front of him, I look up into his eyes. I think maybe he knows I don’t want to talk about anything and just need to be held because he reaches down and wraps his arms around me.
Silent dry sobs rack my body of their own accord, but he doesn’t turn me away. “I’m going to take her with me.”
It’s always a startle to hear his voice since I don’t hear it often, but something about this moment—me in his arms with my head pressed to his chest—brings me salve in the vibrations of his deep baritone.
Without speaking, I can see Lucas nod out of my peripheral, then lock his eyes with Julius. They almost mirror one another with every feature they have, but this time, Lucas wears a concerned look while Julius seems almost tranquil. More unspoken words are exchanged before Julius scoops me up and goes back into the hall, then into his room.
Where Lucas’s room is dark with deep wood furniture and no color, Julius’s is the total opposite. A gray platform bed sits directly in the middle while dim bulbs splash light onto almost every surface. Vintage posters of pinup girls and classical cars adorn the walls, and white bedding sits messed up and lazily on his bed and the armchair in the corner.
“You don’t have to tell me what happened if you don’t—”
“He raped me, Julius.” The words slip out too easily.
I can see him flex his hands over and over while they hang to his sides, but his face and tone stay placid. “Okay.”
He guides me toward his bathroom, but nothing else escapes his lips before he walks to his closet. When he returns, he hands me a plain T-shirt and some boxers. I take them with a shaky hand. “Lucas already gave me a shirt.”
He nods. “I know, but I figured you would want him off of you. I’ll wait here while you shower and call Dr. Kelly.”
He turns to go back to his bed, but I catch his arm. “Please don’t call him. I’m fine. I don’t need him.”
He inhales through his nose. “Charlie, we need to make sure you’re okay.”
I flash him a weak smile. “I’m as fine as I can be. Please don’t make me face the embarrassment of telling someone else. Please,” I beg.
He reaches up and rubs his eyes, then takes in another sharp breath. “Okay.”
We stand on the threshold of the bathroom in a weird, awkward silence. At least it’s awkward for me. I’m sure he’s used to it. “Will you sit with me?” I’m not sure why I ask, considering all of the events of tonight, but I do.
He nods and follows me further into the bathroom. I set the clothes on the counter as he walks to the tub, a tub much smaller than Teddy’s, and starts the water.
“I won’t look,” he remarks as I dart my eyes around the room, gripping the bottom of the shirt Lucas gave me.
He turns his back to me and lets me undress in peace. First I slip off Lucas’s shirt, sucking in his smell left lingering on it, then pull my dress down and let it bunch up around my feet. When I step in the water, it is warm and consoling. Easily I sit, then lean back, letting it circle around me.
“You can turn around.” I pull my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them.
Julius completely ignores my naked body, and I’m thankful. He grabs the detachable showerhead and starts letting the water run over my hair. I lean my head back and close my eyes. “Why do you care about me, Julius?”
I can hear the smile in his voice when he answers. “I care about you at this moment because it reminds me of a time with my mom. A little morbid, I know, but my dad was never really good to her. He did this—” He motions to my body instead of saying the word. “—and so much more. I was the one who helped her. Lucas too.”
I open my eyes and turn my head as he lathers shampoo in his hands. “What happened to your dad?” I want to change the subject from myself and his mom and all the bad shit she and I seem to have in common.
“We killed him.” His face never falters, and his voice stays calm like he’s telling me the day of the week or some other pointless shit.
You’d think I’d be surprised, but I don’t think anything could surprise me at this point. Everything just seems like some sort of fucked-up acid dream.
I try and push the thoughts away as he rinses my hair. Once he’s done, he stands and grabs a towel from the wall, then opens it. I step into it, letting him wrap me up before he leaves the room.
Once I’m dry and have the clothes he gave me in place, I walk out of the bathroom feeling a little better that I’m clean. That Teddy is off me and washed down the drain with all of the dirt and grime.
Julius comes to my side and puts his arm over my shoulder to lead me out of the room. As he opens the door, he leans down and whispers in my ear. “Don’t worry, Charlie. We’ll protect you.”
