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“And what? That’s it. I didn’t know her.”
He looks at me silently, demanding I continue without even saying the words.
I push my hair behind my ears and take another sip. “My dad boxed up everything that held a memory of her. I never even saw what she looked like. All I have is her last name.”
“Why?”
“Why’d he do it?” He nods. “Because he’s heartless, I guess. He said it was too hard, but I think there is more to it, but I never figured it out.”
“And you just left it at that? You never asked questions?” He seems shocked. “You’re so fucking feisty and demanding and you just let that go?”
I laugh and look away. “Knowing who your dad is, you should be the most understanding. I didn’t want to know because I was scared… Scared he would blame it on me. It’s clear he holds resentment toward me, and I didn’t want to have to face it. His actions are enough to remind me how much he dislikes me.”
“You know it wasn’t your fault though, right? Shit happens all the time.” He squeezes my knee, reassuring me.
I give him a tight smile. “I appreciate your pity, but it technically was my fault. If it wasn’t for me, my mom would still be here.”
“He really fucked you up, huh?”
I turn back to him. “What?”
“Your dad. He fucked you up.” It’s a statement this time and not a question.
I let out another laugh. “I’m reminded how I’m not enough by him constantly. Maybe he doesn’t outright say it, but he shows it. He’s never home, and when he is, all we do is argue. For some reason recently, it’s like he’s trying to change, but the damage is already done. It’s hard growing up craving affection from someone you admire just to be shot down all the time. So, I gave up.”
“That’s why you met me, isn’t it?”
I stare into his eyes. “I just needed to feel wanted. You made me feel that.”
“By chasing you,” he adds.
I nod and drop my head, too ashamed to even look at him. This was supposed to be about him. Him and not me. How it all flipped so quickly I don’t even know.
“Look at me.”
I squeeze my eyes together for a beat and take a deep breath before bringing my stare back to him. “Can we not do this?”
He smirks with a chuckle. “You wanted to know all there is about me but can’t talk about yourself? That’s not how this works, Carmen.”
I shake my head. “It is because I say so. You’ve already taken me against my will, so let me at least have this,” I beg.
“You know, you could have been gone already. The whole trying to run away and letting me catch you act doesn’t fool me. You’re faster and smarter than that. I may have taken you, but you’re here because you don’t want to leave. You’re the one who said I made you feel wanted, and that feeling is too intoxicating to give up, isn’t it?”
I bite my lip, trying to think of anything to say to tell him he’s wrong, but when he reaches out and gently tugs it from my teeth, my skin warms up. Fire ignites in my veins and travels through my bloodstream. I feel my cheeks get hot and my core start to clench with that one simple touch.
“Cyrus…” I start, ready to tell him to stop, but the rest won’t come out. I don’t want him to stop.
“Say it again. Say my name.”
“Cyrus.”
A smile graces his lips. “I love the way it sounds rolling off your tongue.” He leans in, and my body freezes. His lips brush the corner of my mouth, and I swear I melt.
I’m nothing but a fucked-up, needy puddle of lust. Part of it is me, but part of it is the liquor. At least that’s what I’m telling myself because I can’t want something like this from someone like him, can I? Regardless of our whole conversation, he’s still a murderer, a hired one at that, and a kidnapper. But he’s also so pretty to look at with his taut muscles, shaggy hair, and deep brown eyes.
“Maybe we shouldn’t,” I finally whisper.
“Why not? It’s nothing we haven’t done before,” he replies, trailing his lips to my neck.
