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“I told you I didn’t have anything to do with his shit! Jesus, Asia, I knocked the prick outfor you. I allowed you retribution,paybackand now my crew is screwed up over it. Now my name is mud!”
“Why fucking bother if you dislike me so much?” I ask, but he talks over me, raging now.
“And after all that, you still chosehim.”
I laugh. I can’t help it. I laugh so hard that tears of mirth, or maybe hysteria, spring from my eyes. “Really? I wouldn’t have needed to seek Ford’s help if you hadn’t set Monk on me. He’s had my back this whole time. Whilst you… you forced my hand. I hadno choice. None.”
“How many more times do I have to say it?”
“Stop with the bullshit, Camden. Admit it, you set Monk on me.Youdid all of that!”
“No.”
“You’re a liar!” I scream, not giving a shit now, as if I ever did before.
Camden flinches and despite the marijuana his body is tense, wound tight. He’s the complete opposite of relaxed now. Blowing out a long steady breath, Camden does something that surprises me. He reaches up and cups my cheek, brushing the pad of his thumb against my bottom lip. He’s gentle, so very gentle and I don’t know what to make of it.
“When I heard you were sent here, I contacted Monk. I might have told him to make sure you knew I was watching, even from afar.” His topaz eyes flash with anger even though his touch remains gentle. “But Iswearto you. Monk went rogue. What he did; hunting you down with his wolves, fucking with your art, that wasn’t down to me.” His hand drops away, his shoulders hunching over a little.
“And yet Monk’s still a part of your crew. He’s still gunning for me, despite everything. At least Ford had the courage to cut Red and Bram from hiscrew for what they did…” I breathe heavily, shaking with anger. “And fucking with my art? What have youjustdone, if not that? A tag is sacred. You know that better than anyone.” I push against Camden’s chest, forcing him backwards against the wall I’ve rubbed clean. He doesn’t try to stop me. When his back hits the brick, I do something really fucking stupid, I press my body flush against his. Despite everything, my skin heats immediately, just the same as the spot on my face where he’d been touching me.
“I don’t have a choice about any of this.”
I bark out another hysterical laugh. “You’re their leader.Youhave a damn choice even whentheydon’t.”
“You don’t fucking get it,” he retorts, both anger and regret lighting his topaz eyes. “It’s not as simple as that. Not for me.”
“Then explain it to me.”
He presses his eyes shut, nostrils flaring. “I can’t,” he rushes out.
“I thought you were the leader of the gang? I thought you held all the fucking strings,” I mock him, repeating the words he said to me all those weeks ago. “What fucking gives, Camden?”
“We’re all owned, Asia. Including me.”
There’s a truth to his words and a part of me wants to delve deeper, to offer him the opportunity to open up and tell me what he meant by that. A bigger, angrier part wants to chew him out. That part wins.
“I don’t fucking care! You took my best friend from me and you’ve destroyed a family. Tracy needs Eastern, Braydon needs him. You fucking ruined them, then you tried to ruin me with this bullshit tag because your jealous of myfriendshipwith Ford.” My nostrils flare, my hands reaching for his top as I scrunch up the material in my fists. Just like before, we are both caught in the moment. Neither of us backing down. Neither of us winning. This feeling I have inside expands and grows. I hate him, yet why do I suddenly want his lips on mine?Why? “Haven’t you done enough?” I whisper.
One beat.
Two.
Three.
Four…
Our eyes meet, his gaze is just as ferocious as mine. We’ve been here before, he and I.
“It’s enough,” he concedes, his arm wrapping around me now, pulling me tighter against him. “For what it’s worth,I’m sorry.”
“You admit responsibility?”
“I admit that I’ve not been the man I know Ishouldbe. I admit that it kills me to watch that prick Monk get away with what he’s done and that Ican’tdo more. I admit my poor imitation of your tag was a low fucking blow. I admit that my jealousy is making me insane…” He breathes out heavily. “I admit that I can’t do a thing to change any of it.”
I’m panting hard, my breath coming thick and heavy. My body trembles with the anger, from the feeling of his body flush against mine and his arm wrapped firmly around my back.
“But it won’t stop…” I say, knowing it to be true.
