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After Jules gave me a ride home, I took a shower and then a nap. Waking up, I felt a little bit better but still not one hundred percent. In my mind, all I can hear is Ana’s voice. All I can see is my name sprayed on the walls of the school. It kills me that we’re doing all of this in secret. The one thing I never wanted to be is the one thing I’ve become. I won’t be his dirty little secret. I won’t. Something has to change.
Trying my best to get my emotions under control, I make myself a cup of coffee and sit down in the living room. I should paint or draw, or do something, but I can’t. Five minutes later, I hear Sebastian’s jeep pulling in the driveway.
As soon as he enters the house, a calm overtakes me. It’s like his mere presence has the power to soothe any ache or pain from my body. The front door opens, and I hear him depositing his stuff on the dining room table.
“What’s going on, Lily? I’m worried about you, baby.” He practically growls as he stalks into the living room and over to where I’m sitting on the couch. When I look up at him, there are tears in my eyes.
Stupid emotions. His hazel eyes soften further, and he looks at me like I’m a piece of glass that’s about to shatter, and maybe that’s because I am. I’m about to break, and I don’t know if Sebastian will be able to piece me back together again.
Without even a second thought, he takes me into his strong arms, pulling me into his chest. My hands fist at his shirt, and I inhale deeply into the crook of his neck. We’ve done a lot of things. He’s seen me in a couple of low times, but he’s never seen me this broken. Carefully, he sits on the couch, never letting me go and positioning me on his lap.
“What happened? Are you okay? I will kill whoever hurt you. I swear to God.” Though I don’t think Sebastian would ever hurt a fly. I know he means it. The warmth of his body seeps into me, and I lift my head from the crook of his neck and press my lips to the throbbing pulse beneath the surface.
I can’t give him up.
“Tell me what happened, Lily, because I’m about two seconds away from losing my fucking mind.” Sebastian tenses, and that angelic jaw of his turns to stone.
“Earlier, I was in the library with Delilah, we were studying, and…” I don’t know why it’s so hard to talk about. Why the words get caught in my throat, but they do.
Those hazel orbs I love so much flicker with rage, “Who hurt you?”
“No one hurt me,” I answer finally.
His shoulders sag with relief, but the tension in his body isn’t gone just yet.
“If no one hurt you, then why are you crying?” His voice is low and reaches somewhere deep inside of me. It causes an ache, a different kind of one, to pulse deep in my core. One of his hands comes into view as he cups me by the cheek and forces me to look up at him. “What happened, Lily?”
Licking my suddenly dry lips, I spill the beans, “There’s a rumor. Someone said that they saw us together.”
“What?” Sebastian blinks, and his eyebrows shoot up his face.
“Okay, bad wording. The rumor is that you’re sleeping with a student. The person spreading said rumor doesn’t know who the girl is, but that doesn’t matter. Someone saw us together. Someone knows.”
The way Sebastian is looking at me right now has me confused. He looks, well he looks like he’s not all that concerned, and that bothers me. It bothers me a lot.
15
Sebastian
I don’t know what’s worse, seeing Lily cry over this or knowing that I’ve kept the secret of someone knowing from her. Guilt from the secret I’m keeping burns through my veins. I can feel the words pricking against the tip of my tongue. I want to tell her that I already know but telling her won’t make things better. Not now.
It’ll just push her away, and I can’t lose her. Not now, not ever.
“It’s going to be okay, Lily. I promise you that nothing bad is going to happen,” I try to soothe, knowing damn well, that it’s a lie. I can’t promise her that we are going to be okay. Not when I have no idea what’s going to happen. This lie, the blackmailing, the rumor. It could all blow up in my face. It could cost me so much more than just Lily.
Lily stares up at me, her crystal blue orbs hold my gaze and remind me of the ocean. I want to dive right inside them.
