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Lexi
My heart is broken.
I cling onto Hunter as he slips away and the tears fall like acid rain. I can’t help the sobs that wrack my body as he slumps face down on the desk and I stroke his head with a tenderness that belies what I just did to him.
I know I don’t have long to say my goodbyes, so I press my lips to his head and inhale the earthy scent of the man I love. As the tears blind my vision, I run from the room and retrieve the small bag I left on the hall stand. By the time I get back, the pain is so powerful it is threatening to destroy me, so with shaking fingers, I take the syringe and plunge it into the phial. Then as I watch the needle slide home, I cry for the man I love and what I’ve done to him. It takes all my self-control to finish the job because this is the third hardest thing I have ever done.
The elevator door opening distracts my attention and just the sight of the first person through those doors makes me crumble. He races to catch me as I fall, just like he’s always done, and as I fall into my brother’s arms, they shut the whole world out. Voices surround me as the cavalry arrives and as I sob broken hearted onto Chase’s shoulder, he strokes my hair and kisses me, offering comfort to a person who doesn’t deserve any.
The apartment is full of Reapers who storm through it like a swat team. Each one doing the job they have trained for and as I pull back, Chase wipes my tears away with his fingers. I almost can’t bear to see the sympathy in his eyes as he smiles softly, “Good job, sis.”
Flash appears beside him and presses a kiss to my cheek as Maverick hovers uncertainly nearby. “You ok, darlin’?”
Taking a deep breath, I smile through my tears. “I’m fine, or at least I will be.”
I watch Tyson and Jet zip Hunter’s body into the body bag and say quickly, “Wait.”
Grabbing my phone, I place my finger to my lips, silencing them all, and press record.
“Here you go, Ryder, mission accomplished.”
I film Hunter’s body wrapped in plastic and say angrily, “Hunter Blake - deceased, now go fuck yourself, I quit.”
Pressing send, I imagine the image finding its way into the monster’s hands and the bitterness is a hard taste to swallow.
Gently, I press my lips to Hunter’s before standing back and saying abruptly, “Be gentle with him.”
I don’t miss the looks the guys share as I turn away and stumble from the apartment, where Chase already has my bags in hand.
Leaving the guys to deal with the mess I’ve caused, I walk with Chase’s arm around me, out of the apartment, without even looking back.
We take the short journey in silence and then as we hit the street, he says gently, “Are you sure you’re ok?”
I sigh, “Another day, another body, you’d think I’d get used to this.”
“It doesn’t have to be this way, you know that.”
I laugh. “I just thought I’d made my resignation speech perfectly clear back there.”
“Are you sure, sleep on it, take some time out?”
“It’s fine. I have a holiday booked—remember.”
He steps forward as we reach the small white rental parked in the alley and crushes me to him in a bear hug and I hear the emotion in his voice as he whispers, “I love you, Lexi. You did good back there. I’m proud of you.”
“I’m proud of me too.”
We smile and I feel so much emotion as we repeat the words we always have. Chase would never allow me to say I’m proud of him because he feels as if he let me down over our parent’s death. But I am proud of him, so proud it hurts, and now as I prepare to walk away from yet another man I love, it’s hard to take.
He kisses me softly on the cheek and whispers, “Keep in touch, you know I’m only a phone call away.”
“Same.”
Once again, I hug him tightly and he says firmly, “The burner phone is in the bag on the driver’s seat. It holds your passport, money and credit cards and a change of clothes. If we’ve forgotten anything, blame Carrie, she’s the one responsible for packing your stuff and remember, zero contact for the next two weeks. If there’s anything you need to know, I know where you are. Stay safe, sis, and remember I’ve got this.”
It’s so hard to remain strong when all around you everything is crumbling. How is it possible to remain standing when you haven’t anything left inside you to give? Somehow, it’s my past that shapes my present and determines my future every fucking time and as I hold on to my brother, it’s with the realization he’s only two weeks away.
So, as I take the rental and reverse it out of the alley, I don’t say goodbye. It’s never goodbye and as I leave New York far behind and head to the private airfield where a plane is standing by, I only hope shit gets sorted and real fast.
