Page 47 of Cocky Caveman


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I hear nothing of the sort, but I give the guy credit for trying to be smooth.

Then he looks at me, all traces of humor gone. “Look after my cousin.” An indirect threat, which I respect. He’s telling me not to mess today up. And he is still sticking to the farce of not calling her by her real name.

“You have my word.” And he does. I would never let anything happen to Ophelia—not counting what was out of my control.

“Hello, you two. I am here.”

I watched him with his wife and child yesterday. He has the dream. He protects what is his. I respect a man who isn’t afraid of caveman-ing-up and watching over the women in his life.

“Chance.” Ophelia tries once more.

He cocks his head to the side, again, as though listening. “Yep! There’s Aubrey. I best see what she needs, which undoubtedly is me.” He moves closer to her. “Go have some fun. I respect a man who cared for you and would’ve happily driven you to your front doorstep if you hadn’t fled the scene. Have a good time. We’ve got the morning covered or however long you need. We are here for you. Take a selfie while doing whatever you are doing, and call me when you are on your way back here. Give the guy a break. Aubrey seconds it because she knows you like him.” And with that last comment, she swiftly glances at me, and I smirk at her—because shelikes me.

Ophelia mutters under her breath, and I wouldn’t expect anything less of my little spitfire.

Chance walks away, waving a hand in the air more like a salute.

Hamlet swings back around to me, pushing her hip out, tapping her slipper on the gravel. “I donotlike you.”

Why does ”Green Eggs and Ham,” a Dr. Seuss favorite, come to mind?

I do not like you on my ranch!

I do not like you carrying me!

I do not like you driving me!

Hamlet, I am!

I’m grinning like a court jester because I could keep that up for another few lines.

“I donotlike you,” she repeats, poking me in the chest.

I laugh out loud because she’s lying to herself, but I can ignore it if she can and play along. “You’re looking much better, Hamlet.” And she is. She’s still got a shiner but no bump. Her stitches look good.

“How do you know where I live?” Her scowl is hilarious, but I can see I have to watch my step. If I blow it, then that will be a damn shame.

“All I will tell you is I am a guy who knows how to investigate the disappearance of the injured girl who flew the coop on Friday while her guardian angel was inside the rest stop buying her list of requests.” I put my hand over my heart. “And not even a goodbye. You wounded me, Hamlet.”

“Well, erm… I … um… apologize for leaving you like that,” she stumbles through, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “How did you find me?”

I can keep on dodging the question, or I can be honest and see what happens. “I got Shamus to put a tracker on Manny when my gut told me you were gonna do a runner on me at the rest stop.”

Ophelia stares at me, her mouth wide open.

I shrug.

“You didwhat?!” she whisper-hisses.

“You heard me.” I stand my ground as she digests how I outsmarted her.

“You are unbelievable!” There’s a storm raging behind her eyes.

“Now-now. Just remember, Hamlet, as a bounty hunter, you hunted down people with the knowledge you gained. As a private investigator, you tracked, stalked, and studied people for your client and then condemned them on the information you collected. I did nothing you haven’t done in the past to get the answers you seek. My case: the stolen leather jacket, and I also wanted to see with my own eyes you were well.”

“Stolen leather jacket?” she blusters, “I didn’t steal it.” She starts taking it off. My hand flies out, and I stop her, shaking my head before tugging the jacket back over her shoulders, then zipping it up.

I keep up the charade. “Well, how did I know that? I mean, it is a nice jacket, wouldn’t you agree. It is butter soft, and I bet you sniffed it, didn’t you? So you know it smells as good as it looks”—I wave my hand in front of the jacket—“and you did run from me with it on your person, and you are wearing it now. It’s worth nearly a thousand dollars, so you can understand the dilemma I faced.”I had to get a leg up here, so playing a little dirty will help my cause.

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