AllFreeNovel
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I’ve never been so sated in my life. My guys took me to new heights last night. Heights I didn’t know were possible, and I know I’ll only ever reach with these five guys of mine. Some might say I’m selfish, demanding, and an immature brat for wanting five guys. For not wanting to share them with anyone else. They would probably be right, but it doesn’t matter what they think. All that matters is what we think. And as selfish as some people might find me, I’m not as self-centred as the Rhys George that was roaming the earth a few weeks ago.
She was a taker. It could have been from the so-called addiction, or it could have been because it was the only way she could protect herself, but she wouldn’t have cared about her bed partners. Love them and leave them was her motto.
Now, though, I know I’d do anything these guys ask of me. If they ask me to never go to a sex club again, I will smile and say ok. Not that last night’s sex party should be classed as us attending since we stayed in the bedroom all night until the guys gave me my wish and fucked me until I passed out. Then I woke in Garrett’s arms as I was being carried through the trees that separate the Airbnb we are staying in, and the house Moxie’s party was in.
I’d panicked at the time, thinking I didn’t get to say goodbye to Ty, but he was following behind, still wearing his mask, and he helped the guys shower me, dry me, dress me in my Flyleaf t-shirt, and put me into bed.
We’d all had a deliciously rough gang bang, yet afterwards, they were so attentive. Their hands were gentle, with so much care with each touch. Their lips were soft, pressing love to my skin with each peck. And their words were filled with concern, compassion, and raw love.
It broke me. I started crying silently, and I had no idea why. Ty explained it’s like a comedown, and he’s right. It really was. My body was coming down from its high, and with it, my emotions crashed.
Even though the others had taken their masks off once back in the house, Ty kept his on, lying next to me on the mattresses lining the living room floor and telling me how much he’s missed me and how he longs for the time that it will be ok for us to be together. Then he left.
I cried some more, each of the guys laying with me and cuddling me, taking turns to give me attention while the others showered and ate before we all finally settled into bed.
I’m sore this morning. Like everywhere. My muscles hurt from head to toe. Kitty is feeling raw, and my arse feels deliciously tender. A grin tugs at my lips as I remember the feeling of being consumed by my guys. There is honestly nothing like it. I’ve spent so much time searching for the next sex high, putting myself in vulnerable situations in the hopes of finding what I was looking for.
I’ve finally found it. I didn’t know it was what I needed until these guys decided to show me. They are my ultimate in every way. My end game. And I finally realise that it has nothing to do with sex at all. It’s about the ultimate trust and acceptance. It’s about love.
With a full heart, I glance at Simon and Cass, who are still sleeping on either side of me, and I successfully slither myself out from between them without disturbing anyone. Garrett is sound asleep on the other side of Shaun, and Marcus is sleeping next to Simon. They all look like Sex Gods with their bare chests and tousled hair. Sex Gods sent to me to make me whole.
Jesus, my head is all girly and mushy right now.
I shake my head. I need a moment to myself.
I tiptoe across the room, heading to the toilet, before I slip into a steaming hot shower as my mind flashes with images of last night. The only thing that would have made it more perfect would have been if we were mask-free. I long for the guys to know exactly who Ty is. I know it will shock them and probably be a tender subject in the beginning, but when they come around and accept that what Ty and I have is serious, then I just know we can all be happy together. I hate keeping this secret from them. I hate lying to them about Ty’s identity. It feels so wrong to keep this from them. To keep anything from them. I’ve never felt like that with anyone before. I’ve never felt the strong need to reveal all of my secrets.
"You ok, Rhee?"
My eyes dart up to see Marcus hovering on the other side of the glass. I flick the shower off, and as I open the door, he grins, holding a towel out to me.
“I’m ok.” I smile. “You?”
He shrugs. “I’m tired but feeling ok. Especially if you are.”
Using the towel to wring out my hair, I step out of the shower and into the chill of the bathroom.
“I’m tired too. But in a good way.”
“Here, let me dry you.” My brows shoot up at Marcus’ words, and I let him take the towel from me, standing still as he glides it over my skin to soak up the water. I peer up at him through my lashes as he focuses on his task, and an aching pang hits me in the centre of my chest as guilt I have tried to bottle up rears its head.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, gaining his attention, and his dark eyes meet mine.
“What for?”
“What I did to you. How I treated you.” Heat pricks the back of my eyes, “I’ll never ever forgive myself for being such a heartless bitch. You deserve so much more than me.” My voice quivers with the emotions I’m feeling, and I notice Marcus’ eyes glass over, mimicking mine.
“You don’t have to apologise, Rhee. I understand now.”
I shake my head. “Just because you understand doesn’t mean what I did is ok. Every minute of every day for the rest of my life, I will ache with shame for how I treated you. I’m not asking for your forgiveness. I just want you to know howsorryI am. I’m not saying this to try and make myself feel better for the hurt I caused. I’m saying it because you deserve better and because I love you. I think I always did. I just didn’t understand it, and it scared me.”
Wrapping the towel around me and tucking it in the front, Marcus reaches up and cups my jaw, lifting my chin so I have no choice but to look at him. “I love you too, Rhee. Nothing will change that.”
I cringe. “Are you sure?”
He grins. “I am. You can’t deter me, Rhee.”
“Maybe when you find out who Tyler is, you won’t think the same way.”
